Chaos Attraction

A Week Of Short Entries

2014-10-17, 6:59 p.m.

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A Week of Short Entries:

10/13/14: Another day at work in which I was absolutely fried. All of the managers were gone at meetings and I was stuck with tons and tons of people with horribly complicated problems that needed managerial privilege. SO FUCKING DRAINING. I wanted to go home and drink, but I had class that night.

Most people in the tapping class feel like they are getting somewhere by now. I...am being my usual shitty self with a crapton of resistance and fear most of the time. Time is running out and here I am still being me. I wish I could get that to stop. I’m so sick of being lost and feeling lost and stuck and afraid to move, but I can never get past suspecting that I’d only make things worse if I took risks, either.

10/14/14: I have switched CC shifts this quarter because I wanted to take a class on Thursday-well, I guess I shouldn't have done that because I'm the only one signed up for it. Fuck. Plus it really throws my week off to have CC at the start rather than the end of it. But at least my people on shift are nice and fun to hang out with.

Last week the manager brought up that eating cheese on apple pie is a thing. The rest of us had not heard of this, so he said he'd bring pie. What he didn't mention about bringing said pie was that it needed to be cooked first...for an hour beforehand.... and this didn't come up until like an hour and a half-ish before the end of the shift. We had repeated conversations of “Hm, where’s that pie?” which I guess translated from him as “Someone else needs to cook it for me” and translated to us as “Dude, why don’t you get the already cooked pie out of the fridge?” AHEM. He did apologize. So we ate last minute pie and cheese. It was good, though. I also had a work class that afternoon (see later) that got out early, so I went out to Whole Foods to pick up dinner and tried the butternut apple soup while I was at it. It was delicious.

10/15/14: I have been flaking out on going to writer's group for about a month and a half-tapping class stuff keeps coming up and I keep doing that instead. It was good to be back. Got some new people and they were entertaining.

10/16/14: Short entry for today, because for once it wasn't a bad day! Wasn't too nuts at work, I had a class to take so I was out of the office for an hour and a half. Oh yeah, and we had a SURPRISE ASTRONAUT come to speak at our office. Total ambush on that one. Apparently one of my coworkers knows the guy. Sure, the one time I need to leave a meeting early and I don't WANT to....well, that figures. But I did get to hear about takeoffs and suits and the scariest thing he ever saw in space (“it was Halloween and everyone had on John Glenn masks…”) It was really neat and I am kind of a bit angry I couldn't stay longer at it. I hope he speaks around here sometime again somewhere since I gather he's moved back to the area.

I have been taking classes on conflicts this week because it is Conflict Week (I can’t make these things up) and hoo boy, have I had so many examples to share with the classes. Hah.

10/17/14: Work sucked.

I am tired of being UTTERLY SURPRISED and ambushed and thrown to the wolves-i.e. people come in and ask hard complicated things that I know jack shit about and fly over my head like Douglas Adams' deadlines. I feel totally stupid and unprepared and look horrible. I have been doing this job for 2 years and only found out today that “oh, we make a special exception for X, we totally do that.” O RLY? One person actually said they should not have made me work opening front counter on today of all days because I just don't know anything about what to do when all these people fucked up and missed the crucial deadline and now they are screwed. By the time I was dealing with the last idiot who just kept making whining faces at me and being all, “but I don't wanna go all the way over there, why can't you just fix it?” (and she was really incomprehensible to boot, we asked her like 4 times why she did something stupid and at no point could we comprehend the lack of explanation) , just...I want to die because that's my only hope of escape from all this. Between that and once again my coworkers and I were forced to spend a long ass time fixing other people's stupid...everyone wanted to go home and I was keeling over on the bus.

I have a jury duty call for next week. I AM SO EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!! You have no idea how DELIGHTED I am to get to go to jury duty and not have to go to work, especially on a front counter day that I can absolutely not show up for, muahahahah. I hope I get on a trial (should have good odds, they are starting 10 DAMN TRIALS on Monday!), and I hope it lasts a week and a half (probably not, this county is rinky dink and I might get out for most of a week) so I can be out until the Halloween party or so.


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