Chaos Attraction

Happy Anniversary

2008-01-21, 3:33 p.m.

Well, Saturday was THE FIRST ANNIVERSARY of Dad's death...and it went lovely, thank you. Going out of town was by far THE best way to handle the situation. Neither one of us sat around thinking, "At this time a year ago, I was sitting around the nursing home waiting." Heck, Mom only thought of that ONCE, and didn't even notice when the exact time of death occurred because she was shopping. I thought about it more than she did.

But it wasn't a sad day at all. We stayed at (la-di-dah) the Hilton there, which had the best beds EVER. Slept in. Went off to Rosine's for both lunch AND dinner- Rosine's being her favorite restaurant down there that she went to with Dad a lot, and it has a huge menu. Then we went to a ginormous antique mall for hours upon hours, where she bought a LOT of salt cellars (it's her weird little collectible thing). I think the entire staff of the place was amused that we'd been there so dang long after she got 15 of the little suckers. Then we went down to Cannery Row and poked around the stores there, got some candied apples and samples of cider, went onto the beach...It was a truly lovely day weatherwise, above 65 degrees, sunny, and I only had on a light jacket and a light shirt on all damn day!

VERY little crying went on, I am happy to say. So, huzzah!

On Sunday, we went to Pacific Grove and the monarch butterfly sanctuary. The weather was going back to normal for this time of the year, i.e. frigid, but it warmed up a bit while we were at the sanctuary, enough so that we actually saw butterflies in clusters in the trees flying around. A few flew by up close, I am hoping I can Photoshop the pics into something decently viewable later.

Then we hit Yet Another Antique Mall, where Mom bought MORE salt cellars, and I grumbled that I'd like to make it into Carmel before all the shops closed at 5. We eventually made it there by 4, but the shops we wanted to see HAD closed by 4. Sheesh. Mostly we ended up hanging out in a gallery, then going to dinner.

The place we ate at was kind of amusingly snooty. The gallery lady had said she liked the place and being that it was a Sunday night, we should be able to get in (Saturday night, no). We walked in at 5:15 and I'd say that oh, the front five or six tables were empty. The maitre'd claimed that they had a full night and EVERY table was reserved...except this little one right here. I was already privately rolling my eyes at this, but I especially did it when he said the same thing to the people who came in after we did without a reservation. A-HEM. Indeed, I don't think the entire restaurant was full up with "reservations" at any time I was in there. Had pretty good business, yes, but sheesh. But they seemed to be that kind of joint, the sort where they put your napkin on your lap for you and hover about and generally make you feel too unsophisticated to be allowed to eat there. (Really, why is that?) We both ordered gourmet pizzas and I kind of cracked up hearing the people next to us (2 20something couples) saying that they'd order the pepperoni and the five cheese.

Another lovely thing about Monterey and Carmel: there's lots to look at, but things are generally too expensive for me to have much interest in shopping there. I bought ONE item- a sun-color-changing shirt- and that was it. GOOD FOR ME FOR NOT BEING A SHOPPING WHORE FOR A CHANGE!

On Monday, I went to the dentist. This was about as bad as it always is when I go to the dentist (i.e. "You're awful, oh, and come back for many other appointments"), but they were at least nice to me about my ginormous gag reflex problem. More about that, I will not say (and really, would you want to hear it?).

As for resolutions...well, been busy this week, so little progress was made there. I finally finished finalizing my visualization sentences and am saying them twice a day now, setting my Palm to beep me to remember to do it. And after the dental visit, I'm thinking, "get and remember to use Listerine" should be added to the little daily/weekly goals list.

I found an interesting blog about shrapnel (yes, really) that had some interesting quotes about turning 30 on it. (I about plotzed when the dental hygenist called me 30 at the appt. I was thinking, "HEY, NOT YET!") I figured I'd mention them here.

"Thirty is a dangerous year for single women. Not precisely 30. Sometimes it is 31, sometimes 32. On occasion, a particularly proactive woman might start to become dangerous at 29. But normally, it is the years starting with the number three.

Thirty is the year a single woman wakes up and sees that one of these things is not like the others, that one of these things doesn�t belong�and that the renegade thing is she. Her friends have married, started popping out the papooses, bought houses and are settled down while she is still�well, what IS she doing?

That is why thirty is dangerous. We decide to search and figure out what, exactly, it is that we are doing. If we are not settling, it stands to reason that we should be doing something else.

Married women will tell you that thirty is dangerous for them as well. They will speak passionately about how they feel old, how they have reached the end of their youth, about how�oh, was that the baby? Their passion is reduced to a subdued whimper and they scurry off to do what settled people do. Do not get me wrong. Married women do get dangerous. But they get around to it later-say forty or fifty, once the kids start having lives of their own."
(Looking at my married friends, they seem to be working on dangerous right now. I am so proud.)

"But we single women? We are dangerous now. And we act on it.

Jennifer picked up and moved from Maryland to California. Renee picked up and moved from California to Maryland, and bought herself diamond earrings to boot. Amy entered the Reconstructionist rabbinical school and Rebecca entered an ultra-orthodox women�s seminary. Jennifer K. decided that 30 was saaaassy, and bought a house. Diane quit her job as a lawyer, sold her house, and traveled around the world. When she came back, she started on a new career in public radio.

What did I do? I moved to Israel."

Okay, I think it's highly unlikely that I'll haul up and move this year (no matter how many times Mom asks me if I'd like to move back home, SIGH), or go back to school no matter how many times someone nags my ass to go to grad school (sorry, still not interested like, at all). I can't really think of anything drastic I might do yet.

Of course, I've still got oh...till about February 1/2 to think about it. Maybe inspiration will hit in ten days?


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