"I was very angry with my father." -Edward Lewis, Pretty Woman.

I am so pissed off right now. Ragingly pissed off.

The day started pretty fine and dandy. Went to the gym with Mom and found myself liking the treadmill after feeling at first like I was a hamster on a wheel. I was disappointed when she made me leave after a half hour and begged to return. Which now, isn't going to happen.

Lately Mom's been wanting a new couch, or at least craving new furniture, and the other day she dragged me into a new store and fell in love with a blue couch. Only, (a) it also came with a not-needed-by-us loveseat, and (b) it was the only one left. After the saleslady told her 2 others were interested in it (hah, if you believe that one...), she put a deposit on it. Now she has no idea what to do with all of the furniture. Though on the good side, she bought me a funky swinging chair I saw there (I've always wanted one). I think she did it to get a discount/not have to pay taxes/something or other deal, but I'm not going to complain.

And then we went home, and everything went to hell.

"Dad's eyes are racing back and forth," Mom said, and they were running off to the eye doctor, and then to the hospital for hours.

To save you a long pointless tale, "he probably has a virus or something. It might come back. Who knows." In the meantime, we are all to sit at home, NOT LEAVING THE HOUSE AT ALL (or at least I can't, because someone with a speaking voice has to be at home to wait for their call) until MONDAY. Because annnnnnny time between now and Monday night, the hospital might call to schedule a CT scan for Dad. And they do mean annnnnnnnnnny time. As in, "They could call you for an appointment at 10 o'clock at night!" So no more using the phone around here, except to tell Aunt Susie we can't go to her house for the weekend after all. I am definitely forced to use the parents' computer the rest of the weekend, with it's pain-in-the-ass settings and everyone coming in to peek at what I'm doing with the handicapped-extra-large-print that I'm not allowed to reset.

And I was REALLY LOOKING FORWARD to going to my nice aunt's, DAMMIT. Hell, I was going to get to go home on January 1 if I was at her house. But nooooo, not only can't we leave the house, not only can't we go, but if they don't fucking call before Sunday night, I can't go home because they can't so much as drive me to the train station. I'll have to use vacation days again to sit at home being trapped. For five long days. Because you know the fuckers aren't going to call until late Monday night. You know they can't make it easy and do something for tomorrow afternoon.

(And why, I ask, can't they call Mom's cell phone? I know damn well they have the number because while Dad was at the hospital someone from there called and asked for him here! And when I said "He's at the hospital, I can't put you on with him," they told me the cell number!)

I am so pissed off at my father. I know it's not his goddamned fault, I know he didn't meant to get sick in the first place or get "a virus" now, but everything revolves around him being sick and I am so mad about it.

I literally jumped up and down screaming, "I AM SICK OF HIM BEING SICK! I AM SICK OF HIM BEING SICK!" and banging on furniture and screeching nastier things than that after I got off the phone with Mom from the hospital. Yeah, I'm a real asshole, pissed off at her father for being sick in the first place and ruining the one thing I was looking forward to during the Christmas vacation.

When they came home, they wanted to eat. I told them I wasn't hungry and had already ate. I need to avoid Dad tonight, or I'm going to start screaming in his face.

And now I'm trapped here for five more days with no escape or release except once in a while getting to beg for the computer if nobody's in the bedroom.

I just want to scream some more at everything and everyone.

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