Unsex Me Already
2006-01-05, 10:24 p.m.
Man, I wish I still had one "entry in reserve" left to post up here, because I so don't feel like writing today and if it wasn't Holidailies, I'd skip.
Mainly I am just... in not the best of moods right now.
Without going into details, apparently the first week of school is Cute Boys Aplenty Week, and temptation is cropping up in places I didn't expect. Plus I will probably have to see the dude who liked me and got over it tomorrow, which bugs me and I'd rather avoid him.
I just wish I could unsex myself. Not quite the way Lady Macbeth did it, but somehow magically take away the hormones and desires. It's kind of ironic that mentally I'm very "ugh" on the idea of coupling right now, but I keep having man-chasing thoughts anyway.
And it's bugging the crap out of me. To the point where I have been trying to find some sort of anti-love spell- or in Buffy parlance, a "de-lusting" spell- online. Course, I've come up with NOTHING even remotely close to that. I suspect it's against Wicca/the Goddess/what have you to not want love in your life, or to try to do a spell that isn't all proactive and bringing something into your life. I want one to take stuff OUT!
I just want to be over having feelings, dammit. I can't afford to be having them until about 2008 or so, and I am terrified that feelings of horny will drive me someday to hopping into a relationship so I can get positive attention...and then my life situation will blow it up better than dynamite. I don't need to make my life messier than it already is.
So...yeah, normally I wouldn't post stuff like this, but I have nothing else whatsoever to talk about that's remotely interesting today.