Chaos Attraction

WandaVision and Bridgerton

2021-01-15, 12:25 p.m.

Work continued to be slow again today, so slow that I snuck onto another online craft party Claire threw from 3-5:30ish my time, still working for 2 hours of that. (Then after all my teammates were gone for the day, my boss, who was supposed to be out, sends me "Oh, go fix 75 complicated things"....SIGH.) Ah well, the craft party was fun times. Though I did found out that Claire is quarantining because her roommate got it, at a job where people were told not to tell that they got it, and her boss brought it in. SIGH. Oh well, at least Claire has her own bathroom in the place and can hide in her bedroom a lot. We had fun conversations about dating and relationships and whatnot, not to mention crafting things.

I also had some entertaining conversations with other coworkers, one who I was commiserating with about being a night owl. And the other one, and a third one, are my heroes today because once again, the client who wanted their Important Document ASAP and has been emailing me and literally everyone else they possibly can about it, every other day, started bugging the public service team about it. I started ranting about how the in-person staff are just literally not responding to me at all about this and as far as I know, the Important Document should be in office since the client said it was returned in the mail. This girl, my hero, said that someone else (other than the usual two) was going to be in the office today and asked her to find the thing, and the other girl did and said she'd mail it. WELL, THANK EFFING GOD THIS SHIT IS OVER WITH. Yaaaaaaaaaay.

I'm seriously wondering if I should bring it up with my boss that yes, I'm aware the in-house staff are super busy and overwhelmed with dealing with all of the physical mail twice a week and one of them has been out a lot, but seriously, taking two weeks to mail out Important Documents is causing our international clientele to have meltdowns and stalk me over the Internet because otherwise they will lose jobs. I'm not sure if they can get a third person in there on a regular basis or not--I only mention that because the night owl coworker said that her group got asked if anyone wanted to do in-person once a week--but god, that would help. I don't want to b a naggy bitch, but when people start emailing me over and over and over and over going "Where is it?" and nobody gets back to me EVER or

At Yarn Club lunch today, someone was asking if there was going to be a march for MLK Jr. Day. I was all "I hope not, under the circumstances," and upon reading my email later, nope. They will be too busy fending off armed insurrectionists for the next week and activities are banned. I warned my coworkers in Sacramento that taking a stroll over there might not be a thing they want to do this week.

I read my alma mater's newspaper the last few days and I must agree with them on several points:

(a) If campus is going to open back up again in the fall, is there any concrete plans about that yet? Hm, nope, I'm sure there are not. The editorial board wanted to know if everyone was going to be required to get vaccinated and I thought, "Welp, it'll probably be like the requirement where everyone had to get a flu shot: technically they won't require everyone, but if you don't get one, you can't come back to campus." They also mentioned that, given how things are going, what if most people still aren't vaccinated by fall? UH YES, GOOD POINT THERE. I would presume everyone will have to pivot back to online again at this point if that is still dragging on, though.

(b) Campus is offering $350,000 worth of prizes for some kind of Healthy Whatever Initiative contests, and the editorial board was like, "Um, that's like tuition for 24 people. Y'all claim you don't have money this year, but you have money to do THAT?!" Can't we use that for scholarships or paying for therapists for the students, which has been a horrible issue since last year and there was a scandal about it? Even more shocking was the announcement today where the grand prize is paying 3 months of rent for 20 people, about $2,500 apiece. DAAAAAAAAAAAAMN.

I suspect someone will say something like "Someone donated those Apple products to us, we didn't buy them," and "All those gift card were donated," and "This is money that is ONLY permitted for such-and-such-a-promotion," but still.

Tonight's viewing: WandaVision! Let's see how this goes? It sounds extremely weird! I've never been into Wanda and Vision seems nice enough, but they really haven't been given much in the way of character development before.

Episode 1: The 1950's Sitcom. She's a witch, he's a robot. She offers him a healthy breakfast, he says he doesn't eat food, she says, "I guess that explains the empty refrigerator, then." There's a heart on the calendar but neither of them knows what it's about. Vision works on 'computational forms" and he's like a walking computer and upped their productivity 300%, but he has no idea what they do all day. Nobody else does either. Ohhhhh, Mr. HART and the wife are coming over for dinner tonight! Too bad he didn't tell his wife, who assumes it's a romantic anniversary and dressed accordingly. Vision has to distract everyone with a sing-along while Wanda magics up dinner telekinetically...and she's not that great at it either. Finally, she gets dinner on the table. Neither of them can remember anything about their personal life, and then Mr. Hart chokes on some food and things get really weird. I suspect Mrs. Hart somehow, as they leave very quickly after that.
Naturally, our song will be "Yakiety Yak." Wanda magics up some rings. They declare that today is their anniversary. Awwwww! Though presumably someone is running their TV life from...somewhere.
The red/computerized credits are freaking gorgeous with this, I have to say. Clearly they used the movie tech for the credits here, I wasn't expecting that.

Episode 2: The Bewitched Episode. Welcome to Westview!
Wanda magics them into one giant bed. The credits go all Jetson on getting Vision dressed. Whoever is doing the credits here has to be having a lot of fun. They're going to put on a magic show.
Wanda is living in a black and white world--so how did she find a red helicopter in the bushes?
Wanda has to deal with the neighborhood queen bee. She meets Geraldine (or is it "Geraldine?"), who doesn't know what she's doing here either.
Vision attends the "Neighborhood Watch" meeting, which is more of a 'sneaking Danishes" meeting and gossip time, I guess? Vision seems confused. "I, too, have some top secret gossip to share. Norm here is a Communist." HAHAHAHAH. Vision chews gum and swallows it. OOPS.
Queen Bee Lady (Dottie) gets really weird about saying she thinks Wanda is up to harm people (?), and then "Help Me Wanda" starts playing on the radio, someone says "Who's doing this to you, Wanda?" Dottie breaks glass and bleeds red. Yep, this is weird.
Talent Show Day, and Vision is....drunk on gum? And staggering? Anyway, Wanda has to magic up the whole show as best she can.
"If only you all knew our secret!" Wanda says, bringing out some distracting mirrors.
"I've been feeling weirdy all day!" he yells after, and Wanda magics up his gum. Everyone loved their comedy performance and they win an award!
Wanda goes home and somehow turns up pregnant. Oh, sitcoms. "Is this really happening?" "It's really happening." OR IS IT????
Then a beekeeper emerges from a manhole. Wanda says "No," and reruns the scene back to the pregnancy. His head turns red, and everything else turns into color as well. Welcome to the 60's!
I feel like we should pay attention to the red in this show. JUST A HUNCH.
"Who's doing this to you, Wanda?"

Yup, it's weird. Interesting weird mystery, I suppose.

Bridgerton, Episode 7: Oceans Apart. Simon shoots and Daphne plays angry. Daphne wants to have her own bedroom, Simon says no.
"My brother seems to be embroiled in scandal." They leave.
Eloise hopes the scandal will delay her debut. She pities the Featheringtons, whose reputations have been ruined now for doing nothing wrong.
S&D start banging again anyway, despite being mad. These people make no sense. He goes down on her on the staircase, which looks uncomfortable. She suggests going into the bedroom and finishing, and he says no. He says if she's not pregnant, he will not darken her doorstep again. NO SHIT YOU DON'T TRUST EACH OTHER.
Daphne arranged for Colin and Marina to talk, with herself as chaperone. She had no choice, Marina says. He's still mad, and leaves. He says if she'd just TOLD HIM he would have married her anyway. AWWWWWW.
The Queen's Luncheon! She tells them she bet on pregnancy. "We have certainly been dedicating our energies to that endeavor, Your Majesty." Simon says with a straight face. The Queen asks Eloise who Whistledown is. Awkward!
Lady D invites Daphne to a Married Ladies Party.
The Featheringtons are here! Eloise drags Pen the hell out of there to check on her. "My mother says we are ruined." Eloise is hurt on Penelope's behalf about what Lady W said. Pen looks...kinda amused at that. Lady F tries to make up to Lady B, Lady B just gets fed up and walks off. Lady F and company have had their invitations REVOKED.
Daphne gives her mom shit for NOT GIVING HER THE TALK RIGHT. "You sent me out into the world no better than a fool." Lady D walks in, and Daphne huffs the Featheringtons' house. To apologize to Marina for misjudging her. She asks about George the babydaddy and offer to ask to have him found. "I am quite capable of doing more than you think."
Lord Featherington wants Will the boxer to throw a fight.
NOW THIS IS A PARTY. "Welcome to my den of iniquity," says Lady D. They're partying like men! "First, a woman takes her wedding vows, then gamblers take her virtue." The general's wife loves having a separate life from her husband and the kids don't miss the father they never see. Maybe he'll write back to YOU since you're not his wife, she says.
Anthony and Simon drink and Anthony asked what Simon did to piss off Daphne. They brawl.
Simon finally explains about his shitty dad. (Seriously though, if all his dad cared about was an heir, why didn't he remarry and try to create another one?!) Daphne is all "what about the vow you swore to ME" and "he's DEAD" and "we can't be happy together because of your dead dad?" and "I guess you hate your dead dad more than you love men, then."
The queen is ticked that her luncheon wasn't commented upon by Lady W. The queen is MAD.
Artist Guy tells Benedict that while he's in love with a dude, his wife is happy with her freedom. "I risk my life every day for love." Maybe you're just all talk, Benedict. FORESHADOWING!!!! (I've read the books.)
Eloise braggingly tells the queen her new theory that Lady W is a tradesperson. "Is that all?" The Queen fires her ass and says she hired Bow Street Runners instead.
"I'm not bound by the rules of society! Please don't tell Mother." Benedict, you are SUCH a go pick up the "French" modiste. Eloise sits there awkwardly. "How was your night, cherie?" "It was everything I expected. Horrible and terribly boring." ELOISE SUDDENLY THINKS SHE KNOWS WHO IT IS.
Marina tries to give herself a DIY abortion at home.
I'm still trying to figure out why Simon is sometimes trying to make up to Daphne. Didn't she rape him? And then, well, Daphne's Time Of The Month comes while they're at the opera. (Ain't that always the way.)
Penelope goes to check on Marina.. She's passed out.
I did not expect to watch a Regency lady getting her period, but here we are.

Episode 8, "After The Rain."
Oh, Francesca is coming home! Who the hell is that? OH, JUST THE EIGHTH CHILD WE NEVER BOTHERED WITH IN THE PLOT. Eloise tries to warn Benedict against Madame Delacroix. Marina thinks the self-abortion worked.
Daphne and Simon are "breaking up" in a few days, after they throw one ball and get their portrait painted. Poor painter guy having to deal with them.
Lady F wants an invite to Daphne's ball. Lady B is totally against the idea, but Daphne is forgiving. She perks up hearing the name "Crane." Alas, he's Phillip, George's brother. (Remember him for season 5, y'all.) He says George is dead. Marina flees. There was a half-written letter George was writing to pledge his love to her. Awwwww. Poor girl. "He had a perfectly reasonable explanation for not writing back to me." That doesn't happen too often to ladies.
Eloise visit Madame Delacroix and hints at who she thinks she is and warns her that the queen is out for Lady W's head. Madame is all "Lady Whistledown can take care of herself." Benedict, who slept over, is all LOCK THE DOOR.
"You are better off without me," says Simon, pretty much not saying exactly what his dad did to be shitty. EMO POUTY DUDES ARE IRRITATING. SPIT IT OUT, DUDE.
Lord F offers the deed to his house in wagering the rigged match. Even the guys he's trying to do that with don't think he should be trusted.
"Can one even WEAR a dress worn before?"
Phillip proposes to Marina. I don't KNOW him, I can't marry him, Marina says. Sigh. She also thinks she's not pregnant any more and won't get involved in any more schemes. This is depressing.
At the boxing match: Will "falls." Lord F yells that he won. Anthony and Siena bang under the bleachers again. WHYYYYYYY.
Daphne found all the unopened letters Simon wrote to his father as a boy and talks to Lady D about it.
Simon confronts Will about what he did. Lord F brags about his winnings. Lady F is all "we can pay the modiste!" even though she suspects something.
OH, FRANCESCA AGAIN. I can't even remember her, poor girl. Returning to five brothers is quite nice, Francesca says. Penelope comes over and Eloise brags that Madame Delacroix is Lady W. (Eloise also somehow thinks Madame is going to defend the F's in the paper?)
Phillipa had no idea she'd lost her dowry. When was it gone the first time?
Marina realizes that self-abortion didn't work. "As if that EVER works," the doctor sighs.
Anthony, still boinking Siena, wants to take her to the ball. He thinks he's untouchable now. Uh-huh.
I'll note that the painting of the Duke and Duchess shows them a LOT closer to each other than they were IRL. They have a brief laugh together.
It's Mr. Finch! The F girls flock. Lady F gloats at the ball. Lord F is uh... not doing so well. Colin apologizes to Penelope and tells her he's leaving town.
Eloise tries to talk to the Queen but is denied. She finds out that Lady W runs to the printer during balls and they're going to find her tonight. She tries to warn Benedict, who blows her off.
Siena has found a new boyfriend instead. No one else will ever look out for me, she says. "I tried," says Anthony. "You are lost, and I cannot allow you to set me adrift as well," she says. GOOD FOR YOU GIRL.
Elois lays in wait for Lady W. IT'S A TRAP!!!!!!!!!!
Lady D has a talking-to with Simon. "I know all." Violet says she and her husband chose to love each other every day. "You are a Bridgerton. There is nothing you cannot do."
The outdoor ball gets rained on during Daphne and Simon's one agreed-upon dance. Oh, England. Lady D declares the ball over. "Go. Out. At once." Simon apologizes. Daphne says she read the letters. "Just because something is not perfect does not mean it is not worthy of love." She can't keep acting any more, she loves him, even the dark parts. You can choose differently. She walks away.
The Featheringtons walk in and.... literally everyone is in the hallway. Your husband is dead. And the money is gone.
Simon wants to do this but doesn't know how. They boink again. He does not pull out.
The Season is over. Colin leaves, Penelope cries. Marina asks how Lady F dealt with marriage without love. You focus on other things. Marina goes off to marry Sir Phillip. Lady F looks unhappy at whoever inherits the estate. Anthony declares that he's going to find a wife now. Who are you going to marry? Does it matter? He's ruling love out, he says. FORESHADOWING.
Benedict says he and Madame D were off at a party last she wasn't Lady W. IT'S PENELOPE.
(I already knew, I read it years ago.)
Fast forward to Daphne giving birth with a large audience. It's a boy. That should get an A name, hah.

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