Chaos Attraction

Too Stupid To Google

2022-02-24, 6:03 p.m.

recently on Chaos Attraction
Over Dirt - 2022-03-02
Sign and Shoe Drama - 2022-03-01
Two Stupid Walls And A Desk - 2022-02-27
The Quotable Steve - 2022-02-26
Home Alone - 2022-02-25

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Cast list as of November 2019

Today's all staff meeting:

They have once again thrown out all of the BigBoss candidates! They want to get better candidates! But um, there's a lot of job openings out there, and the more big shot Giant Org within an hour of us just lost their BigBoss, so um...it's going to be hard pickings, apparently? Meanwhile they are still job hunting for other office's Even Bigger Bosses and my boss is on some committee for this.

THEN Interim BigBoss actually says, "I have my own opinions on that. No one really cares." He proceeds to say openly that those who make the decisions don't care about what he thinks and they just involve a lot of people to try to please everyone. To which I was all, wow, I really appreciate your open honesty on this one. (Also, it's literally the most personality I've ever seen out of him.) Like I totally agree that nobody cares about what the peons think, but usually managers aren't allowed to openly SAY that. Respect, dude.

I had vaguely considered applying for a job in scheduling for like, a few hours the other week. I don't know why I bothered since I have low qualifications and didn't get it years ago when I tried, I think I just thought "hey, they've had 100% turnover, why not," and then I looked up the qualifications of the last girl who got it and thought, "yeah, I can't live up to 8 years of experience, never mind." They are now keeping it open for another week to get more candidates. They want well qualified and a lot of competition...hahahah. Still never mind.

They are going to try to get another temp to replace Hope.

They are doing YET ANOTHER FUCKING STAFF SURVEY soon. FUCK THAT. I am NOT going to be openly honest this go-round.

They noted that we have a lot more hybrid flexibility than most offices at other places, so there's that at least. They also noted that few people are coming in person on Fridays, which made it sound like they might close on Fridays, except HAHAHAHA SHYEAH RIGHT because "but what if there's an EMERGENCY?!?" was of course brought up. SIGH. Seriously, we're short staffed enough as is, goddammit, we could use some bodies shifted to oh, the phones.

And they are looking at getting chatbots. I winced at the idea, but apparently they just want them for "first tier questions," i.e. "how do I do X" easy crap that people refuse to Google for themselves. Seriously, you could solve your own problem in 10 seconds if you Googled instead of waiting days or weeks for someone to find your special email in the piles, and apparently a chatbot would do that, and someone said that the emails drop 40% if you get one of those. Well, in that case, bring it on. But seriously, why are people too stupid to Google? I asked elsewhere online and several techies said that everyone has always been too stupid to Google and a lot of people just want a human to hold their hand. SIGH. Dude, we're OUT OF HANDS.

Other than that, I got moved off BUT THE EMAILS today to go through queues, which made me happy. Mostly because another unit that shares one of them hasn't cleared out nearly 100 of their documents since OCTOBER and I could finally point that BS out. So the lady very nicely cleared them out, said it was fine for me to ask them to, and we had a nice chat afterwards about leadership, har har.

In other news, Ukraine "officially" got invaded (hello, seemed to have happened a few days ago) and that's very depressing, if not shocking after all of this. Sigh. I am not an expert in foreign policy, but it seems to me that nobody can stop him short of going to nuclear fighting, so....yeah, I got no hot take here and will shut up now.

I had signed up for a storytelling workshop today and it went almost very well, except at the end she wanted to do breakout rooms where you shared your story with a partner. And then people started dropping out of the Zoom, hahahahah. She was all "You don't HAVE to share, you can just say you don't want to," and tried to get people to hang around afterwards for coupon codes, but I thought "You can't do that. You can't just sit in the breakout room with someone who's eager to share and tell them, "I don't want to do this," they just get sad/disappointed/awkward and then awkwardness ensues for eight minutes. So I bailed too.

You know what, that's why I haaaaaaaaaaate small group/partner work in general: you're socially FORCED to talk and are very much On The Spot And Seen when you don't want to be, especially when you don't want to talk or have nothing to say. And frankly, the pandemic and things not going well with Scott have fucking BROKEN MY STORIES and I haven't been able to tell any in months. I am not going to most events because people ask you to tell and I got nothing. Hence why I took this workshop, which was about finding meaning in your stories, because that's an issue I need to fix.

Anyway, the workshop before that said that meaning is the point of your story and and what does that mean for you, and knowing the point changes how you tell it and changes you. She said to write down 4 moments, write down the details of one of them, and then write down (a) why it's important to you that you remember it, (b) what do you like about the memory, (c) have I learned anything from it, and (d) have I done anything differently in life because of this moment?

As an example, I decided to use bombing the audition for Urinetown. What I learned from this: (a) I was doing things wrong, (b) I need to learn how to do them appropriately, and (c) I need to lower my expectations, i.e. "all I'm ever going to be is ensemble with no named part." Which...isn't exactly a happy ending there, isn't it. And yet, true. I think you get why I didn't want to share this story as an official story. But seriously, all my stuff of late is going along those lines. Like "sure, I asked a guy out, but after years of hormones going off, turns out he wasn't actually interested! Or is having issues! Or both! Fuck if I know!"


Rehearsal: finished the end of the show, then did piecemeal dance/song rehearsal of various numbers. Worked on the dance ones, thank gawd, because I needed it.

Kimmie is limiting what props you use until Sunday. Sofia has to ask: "Yes, you can use the baby."

Steve: "I lost my notes, but I'm sure they weren't important."
"I do the worst stick figures, but they're funny."
"All I wrote was James."

When Amy and Karam, standing around like security guards, get compared to the Sopranos: "It's actually the altos."

"I want you a lot more snobby, snotty and condescending. You think your shit don't stink." -Steve to the rich people.
"We can do that." -Evan

Aren't you supposed to be off book?
"Well, I'm still going to call line. Line?" -Clocky.

Clocky to Paul: "You're a today guy, I'm a tomorrow guy."

Evan was incredibly graspy at the end in Arthur's direction (he was watching tonight). "Evan's going to freak out whoever's in that spot."
"I only did it because it was Arthur!"

Hugo grabbed waaaaaay too high on Paul's leg.
Steve: "Hugo, are you dating him? Because you grabbed him right HERE. That was so funny. Don't do it again."

Steve says we're going to use tea lights instead of phones in "Tell Her I Love her." Sarah's all "like the tea lights in Mary Poppins?" and Steve had no idea and both of us were all "You were there, Steve."
Arthur: "Sarah, he doesn't remember what he had for breakfast this morning."

Sofia to Steve: "Wedding invitation rescinded."

Steve to Clocky as he watches TikTok: "You are a sick human being, you know that?"

Sofia is all, "I didn't do falsies." She meant false eyelashes, but everyone else obviously interpreted this differently as the "chicken cutlets" variety of fake boobs. Steve told her to spell it out. "It's four syllables, it won't take up too much of your life."

"I'm dainty." -Paul "That's why he dies when he gets thrown off a building. The rest of us can take it." -Kyle

Fun facts: The place Amy gets her covid tests at is now putting up a flier and wants to see the show. The show drink will be called "Rum Bunny Run." Sofia pulled the baby out upside down and we laughed and laughed. Later Steve said to her, "No thank you, Mother of the Year."


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