Chaos Attraction

"By Yourself"

2003-03-13, 8:44 p.m.

Well, we had the inevitable budget meeting at work yesterday. It can be summarized like this:

(a) Everyone has to come up with an "exercise" in cutting- i.e. make up a lowered budget for X percent "in the event of." My department is lucky as we only had to do that for 10%, whereas others are doing 20-50%.

(b) If we only have to cut 10%, we're fine, no layoffs, no hour cuts.

(c) Should they decide we have to cut more than that, "all bets are off." You know what that means.

The HOD is optimistic, and said he made a big deal in his "exercise" about not cutting staff. News won't be heard again until mid-May or so.


Months ago when the school year started, I went to some talk or other by a new vice something-or-other where they offered free food and a drumming performance. What the hell. At this thing, for some strange reason they had name tags galore spread out all over one table. I hate name tags- what if I feel like being anonymous, hello? and avoided checking to see if I had one (which I figured not as I'd been full time for a month).

Months and months later, I have now been assigned one of these name tags. Apparently EVERYONE is supposed to have one, even if you don't actually deal with the public in any way, shape or form. My coworker put it this way: "I have a graduate degree, why do I have a job where I have to wear my name on my shirt? All we need are uniforms and it'll be like we're working at McDonald's."


We got the notice about "please let us know your plans for next year" at the apartment complex, due start of April. Rent is getting raised a ton. I shudder to think what new people must be paying, or hell, what people must be paying at other complexes.

Dave is so definitely not moving in with me this year. I really don't see it happening. We admitted as much it won't happen, though he is not giving up hope. As for me, I get to beg the apartment complex to find me someone to live with. And Hill keeps going on about "get your own apartment." Right, and go broke so I can live alone. No thanks.


I now have a doctor's appointment scheduled for a Wednesday in mid-April. Whee.

I was going to try to get one for a Friday or so, so if I had to force Mom to take a day off work to haul my ass over, at least then they'd get me for a weekend. She suggested the Wednesday as she had the day off work to go to the doctor herself. Okay, fine, so I book my appointment then. Right after that, she gets the idea that I could have come home for a weekend and wants me to change it. Grrr. This led to a little fight about how I never come home for Important Family Days, and I caved and agreed to come home the first weekend in May.

Oh yeah, and she asked about our wedding plans. I said there was a lot of financial stuff we wanted to take care of first. "So you wouldn't be doing it for at least two years, then?" "Probably not." "Good, because a long engagement is a really good idea so you can, you know, get to know someone better." (insert eye-roll here). I told Dave this later and he said I was a lot more tactful than he would have been about that.


Still definitely getting the vibe from Hill about not having Dave over. Though I think for certain special occasions, I'm just going to say "screw her" and have him over anyway. At least for Picnic Day and Whole Earth, since those are special weekend events and he can actually go to them this year.


Sometimes I wonder if Hill and Mom are in some kind of conspiracy together against Dave or something.

For some reason, they are sure very concerned about me going on vacation. Honestly, even if I'm still employed and have the time, I doubt I'll actually go anywhere this year. Can't afford to go have fun somewhere else, really. If I do go anywhere, I have no problems with going sans boyfriend. If he doesn't like it, he can deal with it. (As for Dave, he gets no vacation time, so if we do anything together, it's not going to be for longer than a weekend.)

But does anyone you know, ASK about this kind of thing? No. Instead, I get these comments:

"Well, if you go visit your friend in San Luis, it'd probably be better if you went by yourself." -Hill.

"You should really take a vacation this year... by yourself." -Mom, just before saying that if I go on vacation with her and Dad, they will pay for everything. Okay, might take them up on that if I really need to get the hell out of Dodge.

My personal favorite for the obvious hint is also from Mom, "You should really visit your cousin, but I think it would be nicer if it was, you know, just the two of you together."

Coincidentally, my boss also asked today whether either of us had taken any vacation time lately. But at least she didn't tell me who to not go with.

I'm starting to relate to this thread all too well.

I'm almost about ready to go up to both of them and say "Look, why don't you admit that you just don't want him around? Because I'm really tired of these nauseating pussyfooting VERY OBVIOUS hints that you're throwing out all the time about it." Not that I will ever BE that confrontational about anything on earth, mind you, but this is irritating. Though oddly enough, I'm not getting any specific "We think he's an asshole" hints, which would be an entirely different situation. It seems to be a lot of "I'm not getting as much attention any more, so I don't want him around." Ugh. I'm coming home and I only see him every other month, people, and that't not enough for you? I didn't know so many people were so happy to have me single. It's been a long time, but I don't remember getting so many hints the last time I had a boyfriend, and lord knows the ex had a lot more objectionable qualities.


Scott called up Dave's MOM (not Dave, mind you) to tell her that "Oh, we'll be giving him a ride to work today." They then picked him up and dumped him off at the mall. Which is oh, on the opposite side of town from his work. Good thing they dropped him off two hours early. Sheesh.

Dave's brother and cousin have showed up at the house for the weekend, and its rumored that his son and child's mother will be coming also. Oh joy, ten people and one bathroom again, can't wait. I may end up peeing outside with the dog.


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