Chaos Attraction


2019-03-12, 9:05 p.m.

Quotes from today do not involve GQ--let’s give some others a go:

Coworker A: “I’m not going to be here forever. You know that.” --to our boss during the morning group meeting.

Coworker B: “I use my brain so much it hurts when I get home.”

2IC: referred to our office as the “last bastion of accuracy,” I busted up laughing, thinking of all the stuff I have to go back in time and correct within the next few months that is currently not accurate, due to reasons way beyond my control. She was all “bear with me...”

A card was sent around for our disappeared retiring coworker. You may think you get to leave without saying goodbye, but clearly someone can mail a card to his house. I wrote down what I would have said to say goodbye to him, so that’s done, at least.

I am absolutely loving this college bribery scandal. It has made me laugh all day. This is the funniest bad thing in years that hasn’t involved the Trump administration.

Someone at the CC told me that this exists. I dunno about watching it, but it sounds odd. Someone else also pointed out the existence of an animated movie called “Food Fight,” which took so long to make that people like Charlie Sheen are still in it. Christopher Lloyd is also in it as a terrifyingly animated character.

I haven’t mentioned this one yet, but if you remember our shooting a few months ago: we now have a local rabblerousing idiot who usually works at my giant org and has apparently gone on Twitter for years advocating that all cops must die. A local reporter decided to bust him on this and when idiot refused to apologize whatsoever and instead doubled down on his remarks (which as we all know from the current administration and evil empire and Kevin Hart, always goes well!), decided to get a hold of every higher up he could find and ask “why hasn’t this guy been fired yet?” The higher-ups in turn were pretty much all “we don’t like the cop killing advocacy either, but uh, free speech for liberal arts, man.”

This story has made a bit of the mainstream media here and there but so far has yet to blow into full blown media scandal, somehow, which surprises me given that this sort of thing should be catnip in our society. Maybe all the other dramaz are more important right now, I dunno. I am kind of glad it hasn’t gone full blown memes from hell yet like the last time my org made the world media...or the time before that when my org made the world media...

But eventually the head of the giant org had to write a piece saying essentially, “we can’t fire him, he is immune to firing unless the SUPER HEAD of the entire organization wants to, and uh, we’re looking into the situation.” Ooooookay then.

I don’t know what to think about this. Clearly numbnuts is an idiot who needs to learn a lesson about how Not All Cops Are Killers, Yes, Even After Stephon Clark And Everyone Else, and Clearly Natalie Did Not Do That Shit So Stop Painting Them All With The Same Brush. I do not approve of the shit he said. I don’t know him in person but after this, think he is a moron. I don’t want to defend his dumb ass. But as some folks pointed out, free speech, dude rabble rouses and goes up against cops and does protests and shit periodically so that is what he does as his schtick; and finally: is this “you fuck up on Twitter and get fired” culture a good idea every single time? Do we want our world to be all “One mistake and we’ll kill you,” per SNL? (Though in this dude’s case, it ain’t one Justine Sacco bad joke fuckup, it’s “been advocating for this for years on Twitter and even in interviews with other media." Joy.)

If he digs his own hole, gets fired, and ends up having to drive a bus for a living like some article I read a few weeks ago about another guy who got fired and killed his career for fucking up on Twitter, that’s really on him and his own stupidity, I suppose. Not that my opinion matters on this, as it’s not up to my control, nor is it even under the control of my giant org, apparently.

There is going to be a rally to get the guy fired on Friday at noon, run by the Republicans. Whee. I’m gonna go find a basement to hide in.

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