Chaos Attraction

Appreciative Inquiry

2021-03-24, 10:11 p.m.

We had phone training today. I learned that the phone system through the computer does not work very well, as Adventure Girl couldn't even get it to work, so it was most of an hour about Things To Say To People, especially What Not To Say. Hope (who is being forced to do this with me) was pretty bored. But says she can do customer service just fine, whereas I am an awful trainwreck. Sounds like she was told we were doing phone backup because they are not going to hire another person. (I'm still thinking uh, they haven't even been asking Dianna to do much backup and they've been staffed....but who knows here.) Hope said she couldn't do the things I do, like "I can't do your speed reading, your artsy stuff, your bravery for plays, etc. You're good at all of that stuff. I SUCK. lol Like I said, we've all got our things!"

On the good news side, at least SOME of the dreaded international mailing got done today, huzzah.

I finished the rainbow unicorn sweater last night, and sewed in the ends and photographed it today. I'm really happy with it.

Jackie called--she's getting her second shot on Friday. Obviously she thinks I'm a crazy person because I'm not planning on going whole hog on my all clear date or whatever. Ooookay then. I told her she knows I'm crazy and it's going to take me awhile to work up to acting like a normal person again. I sent her pics of the unicorn sweater and the robots and she said, "omg how you and him holding hands and walking through a field of daisies lol."

After work I went to a lecture by Deanna Moffitt, who used to put on storytelling shows and now is going to do monthly talks on stuff. This month was appreciative inquiry--study of what gives life to human systems when they function at their best. I think I'll pass this stuff on to the collage group since this is pretty vision board-y.

5 Core Principles of AI: Constructionist Principle: * Worlds Create Worlds * Reality as we know it is subjective rather than objective * We create our worlds socially through language and conversations. *We are the author of our life.

"The power of our stories is sometimes beyond our comprehension." The way we tell our stories creates our reality. It is impossible to talk yourself out of trauma. How we tell the stories of our experiences become our experiences. One person is traumatized watching a car wreck, another wants to become a doctor. "You can create a different situation even if it seems impossible." What's the story you're telling yourself about it? (That I can't escape and I need to put up with this.) "When I was doing Crossfit, I was telling myself so many shitty little stories."

Poetic Principle: * We can find whatever we want in any situation. * What we choose to focus on is fateful. * All is available in any given moment--love, fear, beauty, ugly, joy and sorry * We are conditioned away from choice. * This is largely an unconscious process unless we choose to bring it to our awareness. :"it puts us into freeze mode so we can't DO anything." * In a challenging situation or relationship, what are you choosing to focus on? * You have to let it move through your body, you have to come to terms. * You're dealing with stuff that's so old, decades past, we need to help people let go of the process.

Simultaneity Principle: * Change beings the moment we ask a question * Questions are a powerful tool for change * They are the fuel to our experience * When we ask better questions, we get better answers * They can immediately change our focus. * Your experience changes the moment you ask a question. * Your brain is going to answer the questions you give it * We inhabit the world of our questions * They can restrict us to a world we want to leave, or hold the keys to a world we want to create. * We want answers right away, and when we don't get that, we don't even feel worthy of asking the questions any more. * What is something you want more of in your life? Frame it into the form of a question. * We know the answers because we've been there, and those questions keep us small and safe. The bigger, scarier questions move us closer to the edges. * The closer you push yourself to the edge, the edge moves. * Be really specific as to what you want, ask those questions.

Anticipatory Principle: * Images inspire action. * Images we create in our mind can influence the future we experience. * Visualization is both a mental and physical tool. * Visualization helps clarify what we want. * The moment you can create a better vision is the moment you step into that. * All we can possibly know about the future is what we hope, dream and imagine. * We align ourselves to the images we create.

Positive Principle: * Positive emotion is essential for effective change. * Focus on the positive core in yourself and others * Using more positive framed questions leads to more long-lasting positive change * Momentum for change requires positive affect and social bonding. * We co-create our lives with others. Choose wisely. * How can you create more positive emotions and relationships in your life?

Finishing off Women's Storytelling Festival, Sunday night, watching a few days later:

Laura Packer: "it uses the anatomically correct word for male genitalia." She always wanted to "paleontologist, fireman, president" and got told she has to do woman jobs instead. "There was an obvious and easy solution for this, I had a straw, some tape, and a Magic Marker." "I had a penis. Now I could be a paleontologist, a fireman, and a president." So she could pee through it, and did. "My penis got really soggy." "I had my penis, I had my career, I was all set." She told a friend and uh, somehow they didn't end up playing together too much after that. Then her mom walks in one day. "Mooooom, it's my penis!" "It was so realistic looking that I was surprised," Mom says, and left the room. "I could have an imaginary penis and everything would be fine!" she decides. "I have an invisible penis," she says to another friend, who declares that she has one too, and they pull down their pants and compare. But her invisible penis "just disappeared, I guess I didn't need it any more."

Kristin Pedemonti: being turned into Japanese broken pottery art. "My wounds are art! I am kintsugi!"

Claire Hennessy: on failed diets and denial and getting diabetes and becoming "a complete and utter keto bore."

Robin Bady: her building in Chicago was being sold in the 70's and gentrification and everyone was being kicked out... They got a lawyer, they protested, they won! (Somehow!)

Ellouise Schoettler: all about not having a wedding dress when she got married, and wanting one, and then her kid wants a wedding dress, and...

Laura Deal: "I was thinking we could do hot goat yoga, but that might not be so good for the goats...I was thinking kangaroo yoga, but someone else is doing it." (I'll note that she lives in Boulder and was talking about going to King Sooper's and then I was all "omg shooting," but this was a few days before. I still checked the list of the dead to make sure she wasn't on it.) Then she ends up having an elephant sighting, by which I mean she and another guy are "shaping" a cloud into an elephant and then she says the elephant came down... The elephant touches her third eye and "I get a full download of what my new business should be." WHY CAN'T I EVER HAVE AN EXPERIENCE LIKE THAT?! Her new business is ah, dream cloud therapy. (Yeah, I looked at her website.) Laura is very hippie and so is Boulder and it has tons of synchronicities, she says. Hm, maybe someday I should check out Boulder, if travel ever becomes an option again.

Donna Washington: talked about January 6 and how people expect "terrorists" to look a certain way (i.e. not white Republicans). "We're defined by these stories," she said, which is sounding like the talk I watched earlier.

Andrea Young: spraining her ankle mountain climbing as a teenager on a school trip, while having a crush on a guy. He did not come through for her, of course.

Margarita Rozenfield: having a quarterlife crisis, why can't she get herself out of her hell job? Surprise, her life purpose is to help people! (Why am I such an asshole that I DON'T want to help people?! All jobs are about helping people, for fuck's sake.) Though she points out that she wants a secure job, and I'm all oh yeah. Then she gets told by her boss she has to put in extra, like skipping your son's graduation. So she quit, started her own business, and everything is happy for the last 19 years! ....sigh...why don't stories like this .... does it always have to be "start your own business?!"

Diana Veiga: going clubbing in Paris and meeting dudes at age 20. "Oh shit, it was his cousin!" she says as she gets busted

Mary Theresa Archbold: lone performer in her family, all her brothers got stable jobs. She thinks her dad was probably weirded out by that, but he accepted it and wanted her to be happy.

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