It’s 5:30 and I’m drinking again! You know what that means!

* Meg, who continues to change her travel plans willy-nilly, is now supposed to be coming into town Thursday. I guess we shall see if this ever happens, but until then, I AM HOME DRINKING!

* The office was fucking crazypants from when I came in to...y’know, most of the day. I did not clear out my avalanche. I spent two hours of the day being out in the morning picking up prescriptions and was behind the rest of the day. This is supposed to be a QUIET WEEK HERE, FFS.

* At one point my boss came over to me with a giant pile of “could you call a giant number of people today” and I was all, “I AM DROWNING HERE” before she came over, and she was all “check in later if it clears out.” It technically never did clear out. I say this not because I was deliberately avoiding calling a giant number of people, but it didn’t hurt. At this point, try me tomorrow afternoon.

* Weird drama, weird drama, weird drama, again, of course. I had to do a thing I’m forbidden to do because I was thrown into a catch-22 situation, which is a joy. (Otherwise known as “this girl’s life will be RUINED FOREVER” if you don’t.) I apologized to the tech team for this.

* She Who Will Not Be Named Who Does Not Like Me has decided to proofread me for errors and she found one! Huzzah for her! She wins! She is superior to me in every single possible way!* So she was all, I found this error, could you please explain to me why it’s there, I already fixed it, I’m just telling you this so you can fix the spreadsheet. Which she was already in and had me locked out of.

* No, seriously, she actually is. Higher ranked position than me, more privileges and pay. I truly do not get why the hell she seems to think I’m any kind of anything compared to her. It’s like, why should a human care about an ant’s life, unless a movie is being made about it anyway.

I was just rolling my eyes so hard at this pettiness. You ain’t the first one to tell me I made a mistake today. Everyone does it sometime, even me, I don’t go around telling people I’m perfect at it either. I was all, “I made a mistake, thanks for bringing it to my attention, and since you’re in the spreadsheet and I can’t get in it, you can fix that too.” Especially since I had to go into the bowels of the building for an hour of archival special hell after that and had no time for her issues. So she fixed it and got out.

Again, I debated whether or not to bring this up to her boss like, “Shouldn’t she be doing this project now since I am supposedly being transferred out of it?” Except that would get her attention and bugger that. Someday she’ll have to do it anyway and I’m sure she will be absolutely perfect at it and never make any mistakes, because she never does.

I don’t get these people who “have” to win against someone else. If you want to pick a fight with me, you’ve come to the wrong person because I do not care. Find someone else to fight with or go home and screw with the Sims and prevent them from peeing or something. Fine! You win! Yay you! You got your win! You are the best and I am the worst! Yay you! Now do you feel better so we can all move on with our lives? *insert eye roll here*

* Good news: someone else decided to use international mail. Bad news: literally the second after he hit the send button, he was calling here and being an asshole to the girl who answered the phone, wanting his thing RIGHT NOW. (Again, the shipping company is supposed to be getting these calls. So far they are not, we are still getting calls. Goddammit.) FINE, I SAID, I WILL HAVE IT SHIPPED LITERALLY IMMEDIATELY AND DROP EVERYTHING JUST FOR YOU RIGHT NOW...which was a super ass move to do around the newbies in training. I apologized later. I don’t think anyone super cared because dude was being a douche and everyone knew it, but I did get a lot of “It’s okay, we’re here to support you, we don’t want you to lose your shit” conversations after that. My boss in particular had a very amusing speech that was approximately the polite equivalent of “screw this dude’s behavior, his emergency isn’t our emergency.” Even though in this job it uh, kinda is. Sigh. Ah well.

GQ update: I think I should possibly change his name to Morgan, as in Derek Morgan of Criminal Minds, because at this point he and I are buddies enough and he already calls me Penelope anyway. I dubbed him this after he was being super helpful.

I also helped him out: during his lunchtime nap he finally got a call for a job (he has applied for 53 here so far!) and then was not in a position to write down which job it was. He tried looking (hell, we all looked) through his record of job applications and we could NOT find this job. The two listed in this department had already been filled, so heck if we know. I advised him to call the lady back and tell her he was walking at the time and unable to write this stuff down, which he tried and which she understood entirely. However, even the lady could not find the job listing anywhere. He was all, “I guess the universe just wants me to wing it!” I said to at least read their webpage. We are all still kind of confused as to what is going on with it, but he has two weeks to figure it out. I guess his wife wondered on this one and he was saying something or other like “Don’t think I can’t do it, or I’ll divorce you!” (I forget the phrasing). I don’t think he was serious, but I was all, “yeah, pretty sure she’s thinking like YOU were that you were surprised at getting this stretch job.”

Later on, once again, my favorite recurring “WTF” situation came back again. Let me refresh: there is a dude who lives on the other side of the state who has been working on the same thing for over ten years here--supposedly--and since the 1970’s elsewhere, has dropped in and out of here even more times since I last checked, and is now circling the drain of theoretically being done except he’s still never done and really over the limits of what he should be doing and it’s such a giant “wtf.” And he wants to add EVEN MORE THINGS to his pursuits. Like, dude is in his sixties and still working on this and he wants to keep on going even if he ever finishes. Which, who the hell knows, but he wants to come back again....

As I was reading the latest updates to this drama and going “WTF?” GQ took an interest and tried to figure out why this guy keeps dropping in and out all the time. He thinks this is possibly some sort of scam for getting governmental money because “game recognizes game.” Frankly, trying to get some kind of financial benefit for being temporarily “in” here is the most sense I have ever heard of this entire perpetual situation.

GQ and I would just love to hear what the hell this guy thinks he is doing, honestly, except, y’know, he’s never here.

Anyway, that’s today’s ludicrousness, I am tired and I’ve hiked five miles today on top of all of that, so ON TO DRINK.

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