Chaos Attraction

Last Day As A 20Something

2008-04-23, 3:49 p.m.

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Last post as a 20something. Sigh.

Remember yesterday's wish list fiasco? Here's fiasco #4: I now have to come up with a list of "Don't you want anything THAT ISN'T BOOKS? Seriously, don't you want some nice bath products?" Yes, I got e-mailed asking if there was ANYTHING ELSE I WANT THAT ISN'T BOOKS, puh-LEEZE. I gather my aunt is annoyed at my book whoring, combined with the general family attitude of "I'd rather give you what I want." Meanwhile, between the gift-givers and Mom whoring it up at Bath and Body Works every time she's within a 50-mile radius of a store, I seriously have enough bath products to open my own store and run it out of my bathroom. I would put easy money on my having at least fifty bottles of lotion alone around here, and I need to use up some of that before anyone gives me more.

I had five things I wanted that weren't books. Three of them Mom got for me, and the other two are shoes (which uh, can't be gifted). What the fuck else am I supposed to tell her? I said "uh, craft gift certificate?," but Mom has a loathe-on for gift certificates, so I bet she doesn't tell my aunt that.

Last year, my gang o' friends sprung a surprise birthday party for me on Beltane. Which was awesome and unexpected considering that we'd been palling around as a gang for a few months at the time, and heck, I don't think I'd even mentioned the b-day much.

This year, um, I am kind of wondering if anything like that is happening again. Some people in the group have had birthdays in the last few months, and parties were planned with the full knowledge of the birthday boy/girl. One surprise party was being planned for someone else, but when it turned out she couldn't come to her own party, that got scrapped. So far nobody's said a word to me about anything. I kind of figure something is going on, probably at Sunday's next group meeting or at the next Beltane-ish party next weekend, but I obviously can't say for sure.

This kind of makes it awkward since I am debating whether or not to go out of town for the weekend (at the very least, some shoe shopping needs to be done before summer and I can't do that here), and it's not like I can outright ask, "Hey, is anything going on before Sunday night that I should know about and/or be in town for?" Erk. I tried doing some fishing about that, but am still perplexed. And I feel kind of stupid even assuming such a thing enough to need to fish around asking. Like, what if there isn't anything going on and I just look stupid?

I need a birthday craft.

I am happy to report that after uh, six years of working here, my boss has remembered that my coworker and I have birthdays next to each other. She specially came in today to bring him cake/candles/balloon/card. I am monumentally impressed. I even think she'll do the same for me tomorrow! Yay!

This helps my OMGTHISISMYLASTDAYINMY20SOMGSOOLD panic some, because I woke up at 6 a.m. with that in my head. Not pleasant. Time to dig up my copy of "Facing 30" I bought years ago.

I just wish I had some plans in mind as to what to DO with my life from that day forward. I had to accept years ago that my 20's were going to be a wash on that sort of thing due to caregiving/parental hell, but I have been in "Dammit, you should know something by now so you can move on" cranky mood all of 2008, and turning That Age with NO plan and no clue gives me the wiggins. It makes me feel like when I turn 40 I'll be in the exact same state if I don't start moving NOWNOWNOW. And apparently, I ain't moving.

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