Chaos Attraction

Why You Should Just Keep To Yourself

2019-05-22, 12:56 p.m.

I despise Twitter but these days you have to read the occasional feed. In this case, the feed of my favorite author:

”In my last full-time office, there was a girl who hated the smell of microwave popcorn. Out of deference to her, I ate it less, even though it's one of my primary food groups. She didn't care. She started reporting me to HR for popping corn in the kitchen.This culminated in her reporting me for burning my popcorn and stinking up the office while I was on vacation. I got back to my desk after a week, to find a letter from HR banning popcorn because people were bothered by the smell.I responded, in all honesty, that I hated the smell of coffee. Because I do. I don't drink the stuff, and I LOATHE the smell of brewing coffee. If they were banning my popcorn, I said, they needed to ban coffee.Suddenly, one person's non-medical scent sensitivities weren't as important. I ate at least one bag of popcorn a day for the remainder of my time in that office.”

Someone else replied: ”Having flashbacks to when a co-worker complained to our supervisor that I typed “loudly and aggressively.”

She replied, “I've gotten that one, too! Because I can control my typing?”

Deja vu, y’all. I couldn’t eat popcorn or type but it’s fine to HAND GRIND COFFEE in the office? I almost kind of wish I had done this and complained back about that. (Except I know better as a non-coffee-drinker who is way outnumbered in the world to start that war. It’s like picking fights about Catholicism.) But I like how Seanan worked that to her advantage. Go, girl.

Lioness called out sick last Monday, and maybe the Monday before that (I forget) and then Monday and Tuesday this week. She came back today and was utterly quiet and wilted, which is not this girl’s natural personality at all. It’s really sad. I wonder how long she’s going to last before she just calls out on stress leave too or quits or what. Or if they can live off her husband’s job alone or something. I doubt she will endure this forever like I do, especially if concerns about her continued sobriety are coming up for her.

New story from Hamster Girl: she spent $35 on a “quiet” hamster wheel because after a month of no interest in the wheel, Hamster 2.0 has decided he loves it and runs in it all night long. “He cost $12.95.” She also mentioned the time when she had to petsit two guinea pigs named Bubbles and Macho and they had five babies. “I had to name them all. It was awful.” But she says she got better at naming after that....I would like to note here that her hamsters have so many names I can’t even recall them all...We also discussed hamster mazes and I said her daughter could make one out of Legos on her own if necessary, and she liked the idea.

High Horse actually said hi to me in the hall today. Whoa. I had to help him with something the other day so maybe he is feeling like I am slightly less awful or something?

I saw an audition for something cool I totally could have done (except they want a resume and photo and that would have been an issue), except the performance is when I am at the Fremont conference. DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT. Meanwhile I think I am pondering doing the Shakespeare audition more to just get myself into a show again because just looking at Shakespearean dialogue in a script is not fun. No wonder I prefer it live.

I saw the professor’s show again. I decided I’d get there early and then hide in the back (added bonus: in that particular room if you go in the back in the middle by some pillar they have back there, nobody cares if you have your purse over there or tries to walk over you). Since the last few times I’ve went to a show in that room it has turned into a giant racket of noisy while waiting around for the show, I got the bright idea to get some earplugs. By which I mean, I had no earplugs so I got out headphones and attempted to listen to my iPod, which has had some sad sound degradation over the years. Except it actually started sounding pretty interesting if only partial bits of the sound was going through...which is weird. So I was knitting, reading the aforementioned Gottlieb book (my neighbor found this interesting eventually) and iPodding and...y’know, blending in with the nearest wall.

Slight problem with this one is that the room did not totally fill up like it’s a Friday night.

Anyway...she did see me and come over to ask what I was knitting (I’m attempting to design a Captain Marvel sweater, this is...attempt #2). Not sure if she actually like, remembered me from before or was just curious, I suppose. I felt like she was almost going to say something else, and then the phone rang, and there were issues getting her camera crew to the right locations...and that was the end of that and I ended up talking to my neighbor.

The show was awesome as always, I like how she updates it with whatever crazy-ass medical disasters she’s had since the last time. I asked a question (oh what the hell, she knows I was in there) about medical insurance when she’s in England. She did make one vague reference about getting around to e-mails. I assume at some point the video will be online for this one too so I don’t think I’ll attempt recapping it again, but I really enjoyed it even beyond reasons of “I don’t want to be home sad missing rehearsal” and “y’know, just feeling angsty.”

I wanted to wait around to talk to her after the show, and kept thinking of cool shit I’d like to tell her about in the last few months.... but instead I just got up and went home this time. So good for me there. I guess. It wasn’t what I wanted to do but probably what she’d want me to do, i.e. bug off.

I have no idea if it was a case of “I just forgot on e-mail” or a case of “Nah, she wasn’t great and I’m just going to ignore this,” and I will probably never know. And let’s face it, do you want to ask if it’s the latter? (Or answer if someone asked you that and that was your true answer?)

But as my therapist said, odds are she didn’t remember me since then anyway, and have a little self-respect, Jennifer, don’t just hang around looking for crumbs. Or hoping that she somehow e-mails me because that shit never happens (except with the one ex and that didn’t go well, now did it?).

Maybe just don’t check the personal e-mail tomorrow. I keep hoping to hear from cast members too and that’s not helping either.

Uh, that said, there’s another stand-up comedy show on Friday night. I should be even more invisible in a bigger room though, so.

I did a tarot reading about this (past/present/future and got Queen of Swords (clearly her), the Star and then 8 of Cups. Clearly 8 of Cups says “move on ya dumbass,” so I don’t know why the Star is in there like there’s hope.


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