So staff meeting was fun this morning! I came on to find Lioness crying (and apologizing for crying on Zoom) because she is so exhausted after every day that she has to nap for 2.5 hours every day after work, she talked to a union rep or someone and was told that things are only going to get worse for the next several years. She pointed out that one person (i.e. me) cannot keep up with all the things. She was asking to have BigBoss come to one of our team meetings.

Frankly, I don't see the point in that one. BigBoss has apparently hugely squashed our boss, because ours can't answer anything any more and has been told to direct all questions to BigBoss. Also, what is BigBoss going to do? I'm sure she's told us everything she knows about what HR is doing, so there shouldn't be "new" news. What else can she do, just spout some more platitudes at us? We already have Grandboss for that (which certainly went on today). BigBosses in general never seem all that aware of what is going on in the office, since that is grandboss territory to deal with that shit and BigBosses' primary job is to deal with other offices anyway--directly stated by BigBoss #2 since I started here, that is an "ambassador" job.

Frankly, I'd have more respect for management if they were all, "Look, we get it, we're sorry this is happening, we tried to hire other people, but we got cockblocked by HR again, there isn't shit we can do to help you, and you are just going to have to carry on doing the best you can for as long as you possibly can until you collapse. There are no other options and you need jobs and there is no way to get another job now." Just be honest with me that I'm fucked and you're useless. I don't need platitudes, they are not helping. Hell, that's yet another reason why I'm not bothering to speak.

That said, I did text Lioness privately that yes, I cry all the time, that's why I'm off camera, she is absolutely right to point out that with only one person, things will not be kept up....but they're not going to do anything about it but penalize me, so I am not going to speak up. No response on that one, but I assume she is quite busy today and I will likely hear later.

Penguin Girl said something about "look for appropriate spaces to express how you're feeling." Ooookay then. Then the conversation morphed into how Sacramento is now on a curfew, and Grandboss (who used to work for police) said that if you see piles of rocks somewhere, someone is stocking up to do some damage, so watch out. She also said that in her day, most of the cops were good, but there were a few obvious bad apples that needed to be gotten rid of. My boss said, "My parents live in Long Beach. I woke up to," and then she held up her phone, with a picture of something on fire. Someone else said a state of emergency had been declared here. Grandboss (currently located in Washington with the other grandchildren) said that her plan was to come back to California in mid-June "based solely on the pandemic," but now her relatives have objections to her coming back there to be all alone. I wouldn't argue with that one. Being alone makes you nutterpants. "2020 has been really, really...." Grandboss couldn't finish that sentence.
My boss's signoff in that meeting: "Have a best Monday as you can."

I started thinking that maybe I won't be able to get groceries at all if things get even crazier.

Right after that I had my smaller team meeting (boss, Tigress, Coworker Sarah), in which boss said she isn't allowed to answer anything and "I already got my hand slapped for asking too many questions." OH THAT IS REALLY BAD. Coworker Sarah was once again directed to talk to BigBoss. Her response to that was, "Hi BigBoss, I petted your dog once, I'm a single mom who wants to know about her future..." Tigress volunteered to talk to BigBoss because they can't hurt her any more, and also said, "Because they don't care, bottom line." My boss was all, "Everybody knows it's too much. There's no disputing that." Everybody is either out of a job or overloaded now.

Anyway, I pointed out in all the meetings that my current huge name proofreading situation is now a Dire On Fire Emergency (I already got asked to provide an estimate of when it'll be done and I was all, "HAHAHAHA NOOOOOO I STILL HAVE LIKE 150 PAGES TO DO HERE") and I can't do training today, I can't do anything at all else today BUT that, so boss delegated that all three of them pass off the name document per hour to work on it for me. They got their end of it done and kept me out of training today, but I'm still not done yet and had hours of training scheduled on me starting bright and early at 8 a.m. the next few days! Gee, thanks for taking away the two hours during the day I might have to do some work.

I had to have an Important Document shipped to someone in town and UPS notified me that they weren't delivering it due to either a weather issue or a severe emergency. The weather seems fine and sunny out as far as I can tell, so what the hell was the emergency? Are protesters out on the freeway or something? (Spoiler alert: turns out dumbass didn’t bother to mention that he was having it sent to his friend and UPS refused to deliver it because the name didn’t match. God, I’m so tired of my clients being stupid. I tell them this over and over again. PLEASE TELL ME IF IT IS GOING TO YOUR DAMN FRIEND.)

In other news of the outdoors, one of my upstairs neighbors is now hocking loogies off the patio. THERE IS A FUCKING PANDEMIC GOING ON, WHY CAN YOU NOT KEEP YOUR BODILY FLUIDS TO YOURSELF?!?!?! God, I wish I could just hang around outside in the sunshine on my own (rental) property without having to think about everyone else's bodily fluids flinging themselves in my direction. And y'all wonder why I've gone insaner than usual.

I was chatting with one of the younger coworkers briefly and she asked what I was making for Halloween and I said probably nothing because of the pandemic, guess I'll just recycle a costume or something, and she was all, "yeah, I forgot that was going on," and I was all, HOW?1?!? and she was all, "yeah, my germ pool and I just socialize by ourselves outside." Hah, “germ pool.”

On a good news side, I pimped my new show to various folks online as per requested, some expressed interest, and several said they signed up to see it! Huzzah! I also heard from Cameron saying that she missed seeing me and am I up for her mailing me random letters from time to time for fun? Sure! (We have discussed this before, but while we were walking around at her birthday, so we never like, got addresses and whatnot. As of my posting this days later, I see that it’s in the mail but I haven’t actually gotten mail out yet.) I had fun emailing with Coleman about the next play and rehearsals and whatnot (she shall play Bertram, I think that'll be fun for her because he's such a rich snot). The list is out to all now, huzzah to that too.

My mother, of course, ignored the whole thing but sent me a ton of email forwards instead. You know what, that's fine, she's not going to like a play about a formerly suicidal mom who smoke e-cigs anyway and I literally have not even told her the plot for her to complain about it. But I am gonna say it's still shitty mom parenting. I think quarantining alone is good for not getting contaminated, but bad for the psyche in a lot of ways. I kinda wish I wasn't going to be utterly alone for the next several years at least, but my only option would have been to do it with Mom and I would have wrung her neck after a week.

I spent the evening figuring out how to order delivery on safeway.com. It's been 82 days since I last got groceries.They had plenty of available times and no restrictions on well, anything, and only charged $5.95 for delivery, which seems ridiculously cheap, but then again, I ended up spending $400 on groceries. Then again, if you don't buy any groceries for 2.5 months, it saves you a lot of money. I used to go once a week for lunch fixins and then one giant trip per month. Unfortunately, a lot of the stuff I was getting on sale expired tomorrow, so I had to have them deliver it during the work day--I chose 12-1 because that is when everyone else is at lunch and hopefully that means they won't bother me so much. Hopefully this works out, but we'll see.

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