Chaos Attraction

Mom's In A Pot Now

2019-06-29, 10:06 p.m.

Laurel’s mom’s funeral. Here’s how it went:

I got there before everyone else and said hi to Laurel and hugged her. She had a table with photos and books and portable lights (apparently she is as into those little strings of lights as I am and had them up in her house later, of course I showed her my Christmas tree outfit) and another table for an art project to have people sign or otherwise decorate with glitter and gems and stamps or whatever on a sky picture. I appreciated that.

I wasn’t sure what to wear--either all black or go colorful if it’s “celebration of life?” and went with wearing my Loretta dress since the rest of my funeral-appropriate wear is for cold weather. Laurel also had a black dress on (one of her mom’s, she said later) so at the time I felt appropriate, but was still eyeing people in pretty colorful dresses during the whole thing. Cameron came in next and said she’d been having the same fashion debate and also went for black. Scott came in after that and well, just wore dark colors because being a dude, I guess. Thus concludes the fashion debate, I suppose. Sarah never showed but I assume she probably had kid issues/no sitter. Valentin came, sat on the opposite end from us and then apparently bolted after and said hi to no one.

The pre-show slide show featured some amusing photos, such as (a) a goldfish wearing a shark fin and text saying “Don’t tell me who I can’t be” (or something like that, went too fast for me to photograph), (b) statues of ducks wearing knitted hats, and (c) a drawing about positive vibes that has stick figures vomiting rainbows at a person.

There was a lot of music during the show--her mom’s choral group, various family friends, audience participation singing (as usual, Scott and Cameron were fabulous and I was....so low you can’t hear me), and a freaking ten piece mariachi band, which reminded me uh, way too much of 90’s movies. (disclaimer: OJ is in that clip). Relatives that couldn’t attend sent emails to be read aloud. Laurel did a sweet speech in which she was ah, commenting about how her mom now fits in a pot...It was a lot more fun and sweet than say, my dad’s funeral back in the day (and god knows there were more people speaking). Her mom sounded awesome and we all said we were sorry we never met her but it’s clear where Laurel gets it from.

That said, I was pretty well frozen still during the whole thing and had a hard time getting up when we were supposed to. I was bizarrely still, for me. And then the end had people singing, “You Are My Sunshine,” which is when I started to break down. Oh dear god, having to sing “please don’t take my sunshine away” at a funeral? Roadkill, absolute roadkill. I managed to not like, do beyond a few tears so there’s that and I didn’t embarrass myself or run out of the building or anything (was tempted once that song started), but Cameron agreed with me afterwards about that song.

Laurel was worried about people not showing, but it was pretty full in the end. We also saw some folks we recognized from TnT’s Wedding later and said hi to them (“oh, she caught the bouquet!” “I remember them from the dancing!” “I have the same outfit on!”). Some said they want to come back for As You Like It. Mostly the three of us hung together and had random conversations about Marvel movies, whether or not people look like other people, silly voices, relatives, and at one point Scott found some book written by the QI people on the memorial table and started reading to us extremely weird facts about octopus legs and their detachable penises. I seem to recall that Cameron and I were talking about how much we liked this whole theater people friend group.

We talked to Laurel around the end and also to her friend Lindsay, who invited us to come by Laurel’s house afterward. Cameron declined, saying she was too tired, but Scott and I went over. We had a very nice time hanging out on her patio. We talked about what musical instruments folks played and Laurel busted out a guitar for Scott to noodle on. Laurel has a dog and cat and we made friends with the dog, but the cat remained elusive and hiding. She was in a pretty good mood, all things considered, after the whole event was over. I know that whole “relief” thing. She talked about what she was doing with the house now that she owns it.

And after awhile she got the idea to go walk around the creek...the actual, running-water creek that’s in this town, not the stagnant pond we call a “creek” that is the arboretum, which was dammed off due to flooding yonks ago. This is something I’ve tried to drive around and find and never did, which turns out to be because the actual location is pretty far off campus and the creek is fairly far down from where you park. So we hiked around, found baby birds and rope swings, and when they got down to the creek, Lindsay and Laurel went swimming. Those of us who had had no idea that swimming might be an option of the day and were not dressed for it did not.

It seemed like Laurel came out of it in a good mood and happier and relieved after doing something fun. So yay for that.


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