Chaos Attraction

Always Look On The Bright Side of Life

2019-07-11, 1:20 p.m.

Tonight’s rehearsal got surprising. I don’t normally see rehearsals of act 1 and 2 (so far) so we all found out a few things going on... I also ended up playing Rosalind again since Cameron comes in late on Thursdays. She is teaching a class in Woodland and got held up by her supervisor coming in.

Laure thinks Shelly is a blonde (she isn’t) and was mixing her up with Sarah (who is). Huh? Meanwhile, I, the other blonde with glasses, is just sitting there next to her. Huh.

“I’m in a really sassy mood.” -Sarah

Sarah also told a story about sleepwalking at camp and being found by a counselor: “Apparently I thought she was a Japanese man and I said no tea...”

Jeff was there again bringing props. There are a bunch of old protest signs from when they did “Inherit the Wind” backstage and he came out and said, “Okay, I have something to say...” and then held up the sign saying “My Ancestors Aren’t Apes.”

“That’s how I know I have it memorized. When it sounds crazy, I know I have it down.” --Jim

“It’s bitchslappin’ time!” -me watching Cody and Scott fight in the first scene. Cody seems to have really choreographed his fight scenes, incidentally.
“This is a very long rant while you’re strangling somebody.” -me, watching same scene

When Laurel says that someone should bear the fallen Charles the wrestler away, she snaps her fingers for some lackeys to come out and do it. She also pokes him with a toe to check. When rehearsing, the guy playing Charles was all, “oh, fall,” and then she’s all, “he can’t speak.” Her Le Beau is such fun.

I was playing Rosalind during the wrestling scene and she gives Orlando a necklace. I pulled one of mine off and gave it to him the first time and that went great...and then on round 2, it caught in my hair SO bad and ridiculously. Thankfully, Cameron came in at that point so I could decamp and get everything out of my hair. I even knocked out an earring, which she found later for me.

“Cody, who do you play again?” -Sarah
“They haven’t told me yet. I’m a pinch hitter.” -Cory

I suggested part switching and Cody said he wanted to play Charles so he wouldn’t have to do much.

“We need a couple guys to take up space here,” Laure announced during one scene, so Cody and Brian marched on and bro’d it up hilariously.
“Is there Thanksgiving? There’s a lot of ham in here.” -Scott
“No, it’s all the turkeys.” -me
“At least it’s not a synagogue.” -Scott

Cody raided the dinosaur egg machine again and Scott was all, “Life finds a way, Cody.”

Valentin straight up ate a banana peel tonight. “It’s appealing,” said Brian.

Scott had on a shirt that was a Peanuts parody--instead of Schroeder playing the piano, it was Freddie Mercury.
“Did Schroeder have a midlife crisis?” -Jeff
“He wants to break free.” -Scott

“I’ll bring marshmallows!” -Sarah
“Yay! I hate marshmallows!” -Laurel (discussing sleepovers)

We discussed caller ID and robo-calls. Cameron mentioned getting one ID’d as “Fruitland” and wondered if it was Candyland’s more health-conscious cousin.
“If someone had told me that I could be getting phone calls from robots, I would have thought that was cool.” -Cameron

“I drink 1 glass of wine and fall asleep.” -Cameron
“That’s a problem. It cuts down on your drinking time.” -Jeff

Jeff made the mistake of suggesting that Cameron be forced to do karaoke. “I’m squirrely,” she said. I said, “Also it’s hard to drag her by the hair.” Also Cameron said she would bite him, and “I am a classically trained opera singer and I can scream like a banshee.”

Oh, we had Monty Python come up tonight. As in, remember how Laure doesn’t like the Shakespeare songs? She has now decided to split up the Amiens part that Jean bailed out on and split it up among three people and the song she wants sung there is... no joke... “Always Look On The Bright Side of Life” from Life of Brian.

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat? Yes, we are now going from “all the world’s a stage” to “always look on the bright side of life,” I guess. Also, so much for staying period? Also Shelly is singing it like an opera singer, which makes it the prettiest version of this song you’ve ever heard.

Liz, who plays Duchess Frederica and was just waiting around for ages to be in a scene again and was playing solitaire on her phone: “I look up and was all, What was this?!”

Scott decided to ride some horse/coconuts around the room once this started going down. At some point around this area of the notes I have down that Cameron said, “Jennifer’s an easily gratifying audience.” True. Who knows what bit I was laughing at this time but could be anything at this point....

This was about making those of us not in the scene lose our minds and/or debate about how this is not legal (Jeff said that mentioning that not legal ...I think it didn’t go well?). Cameron was all “Shakespeare is rolling in his grave.”

Now I am seriously wondering what I am going to end up doing in lieu of singing about lovers and goats. “Every Sperm is Sacred?” “Muskrat Love?” I had to explain this one to Scott: “It’s absolutely awful and exactly what it sounds like.” I listen to way too much bad music for the horrorz.

“I think the Monty Python foot could come down and squash us all.”
“Or the police come and arrest us all.” -Scott and Cameron, though I forget exactly who said what.

“This is our reality.” -Cameron
“We must be in some weird episode of Twilight Zone right now.” -Scott

Shelly, while rehearsing and the people on stage are doing some kind of lazy kickline: “You need to give us something to do or else we’ll just keep doing this.” The actress playing Adam (Carol) wasn’t there that night and the guy filling in for her was all, “should Adam be dancing during this?” Jim suggested, “That’s why Carol’s not here, she’s practicing her dance moves.”

Later, Jeff mentioned that he made a crack about “can I wear suspenders and a bra?” during the War of the Worlds play and only Robert (uh, another Robert...Elizabeth’s dad, I believe) and Scott got the joke. Why am I not surprised.

Scott got this bright idea: “I’m gonna Deadpool the shit out of Oliver.” I was all, “PLEASE DO IT.”

And finally, Laurel and Blonde Sarah have asked to be added to the karaoke text. After getting Sarah’s number I sent out a test text, which she did not get. I then ended up refiguring out to do another version of the group text again and then got the bright idea to send a test text to see who was getting them (since most of the folks on the text are here anyway). “If you got this, say something weird to prove you are alive.” (Blonde Sarah did not text back, but said she got it, so there’s that. No idea if Manny ever receives anything.)

Redhead Sarah: “Schnicklefritz.”
Valentin: “We’re the church”
Brian: “I saw Valentin eat a banana peel, that was pretty weird.”
Laurel: “Upside down for eternity.”
Robert: “I apparently have a potato-chip dance.”

At this point Scott was all to me, “What gave you the giggles now?” I was all, “check your phone.” He eventually chimed in with a joke about a vet finding a rectal thermometer in his pocket and saying “some asshole’s got my pen,” and I was all, “saving that for my cousin in vet school.”

Then Laurel was confused as to who was texting what when they were not in the phone (or at least, who said the bit about the banana peel) and Brian responded that it was him, “aka cookie crumble. Was that the nickname that was decided for me?” Valentin said yes and “if Brian is Cookie Crumbles, who’s Booberry?” I know this cereal discussion went on backstage sometime circa Tuesday but I walked in partway through so I have no idea what this was all about. I don’t think Scott was even on that end of the stage at the time to hear this whole cereal thing, but then he went in with, “somewhat round, pale as a ghost, with a weird voice? I think that’s me,” and then I said something about with this kind of logic, I should be Fruit Loops.

And that’s all the comedy recap for this week....

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