Chaos Attraction

Exhausted

2018-07-15, 9:18 p.m.

Thursday: I got my review on paper. Of course, the good is in the end trumped by the usual "Jennifer can't interact with human beings in the way that we want literally no matter what she does or even if she takes fifty classes in socialization." With added bonus of ... and I don't get this at all, I should be in charge of getting tons of other offices on board with improving things.

Uh, I have no power, nobody listens to me, I have no control over others and oh, EVERY TIME I TALK SOMEONE IS MAD. This is a good idea? Seriously?

I normally think my boss is awesome but this is a giant WTF. I can't say I'm shocked at the "yes, you still suck and we just can't let it go because you are The Worst no matter what," (seriously, I've gone over a year now without that kind of complaint from the public) but on top of that? Come on! I know he's into Leadership and I disagree with this because I hate that shit, but...WTF

I also stupidly walked five miles in heels that day. I normally don't wear high heels except once in a blue moon (after several trips on the broken curbs in platform shoes one summer, I gave this up), but I found some really cute rainbow comfy ones and decided to give it a go. I did not think I was going to end up walking 5 miles that day and being in said heels till after 11 p.m. because my volunteer job ran REALLY late that day. My legs were sore and turned into Barbie legs for two days.


Friday: I called in sick to work and went back to bed until 2:15 that day.

I felt slightly recovered enough to do something fun as per my shrink's suggestion, so I saw Ant-Man and the Wasp once I got out of bed and did stuff like go to Kaiser. It was pretty good. I liked it well enough, especially the special effects. Ending is a bummer though. Thanks, Thanos!


Saturday: Still felt tired but decided to spin yarn all day (I got 6 balls done) and I went to go see "The Thanksgiving Play," which is written by a Native American playwright who was sick of hearing how nobody can put on her plays because they can't find Native American actors and are afraid to cast anyone not-NA for fear of controversy. So she wrote a whole play about Native American issues with all white characters--a vegan hippie drama teacher, her hacky-sackin' street performer hippie boyfriend, a nerdy history buff who wants to write, and a bimbo actress who they THOUGHT was Native American but actually isn't, trying to write a Thanksgiving play for children. It was very funny.


Sunday: I still felt like exhausted chicken fried ass that day but decided to drag myself anyway to Bricks By The Bay, a big ol' Lego exhibition/con in Santa Clara. It is quite an amazing thing to see. Giant cities, an entire street fair, artworks, ships, castles, Civil War reenactments, giant ball transport systems, animation, and one group made an entire giant tree that has minifigs cilmbing it in an active show to fight a dragon or two at the top. AWESOME. I think that probably won the contest.

Even these days, politics is in the Lego. There was a Leia's "MeToo" moment in which she thought of Jabba (won an award for "best mashup"), and there was a hidden Families Belong Together protest in one little city. When I went into the vendor room, I saw one vendor with MAGA signs and when I saw the "Prisoner Hillary" custom minifig, I was all, FUCK THIS SHIT NOT BUYING HERE.

There were several vendors offering "make your own minifigs from these bins" and I found some bins that had tons of Star Wars figs, so I ended up making FOUR Princess Leias (the fancy ceremonial dress I wore for Halloween, her Endor camo outfit, even her Endor dress, and I forget the other right now), which I didn't even know existed. I then got four Han Solos to match. So that made me happy. I came home and set up all my minifigs in displays. I also bought a hat that has Lego bits on it and put all the Leis and Hans on it. Next year, something to wear to the con.


Monday: I wish I hadn't called in sick Friday because everything was on fucking fire today at work and it took most of the day to put out every single urgent plea, incoherent phone message (if you want a call, you gotta leave a number first), and found out that one government agency refuses whatsoever to accept what we send them. I also had to deal with a foreign government agency which isn't even as insane as the usual ones I deal with, and, and, and....I was very tired.

I missed all the political drama today so now I am home reading it and drinking again.

Meg is getting harassed by her neighbors and I feel horrible for her.

Though I did hear a funny story at knitting group about, no joke, a gang that makes scrapbooks. THIS IS A THING A GANG DOES. With stickers.

I also sat through a class on dialogue and how to not lose your mind fighting with crazy people, which is relevant to all of our interests.

My review is tomorrow. I hope I can just sit there, take my punishment and keep my mouth shut because I have been upset for days about this and I cannot speak up about it.


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