Chaos Attraction

State Fair and The Greatest Showman

2018-07-28, 10:24 p.m.

I went to the state fair today. Notable moments:

* I bought two dresses that are lovely at my favorite vendor, and three pendants. I like the pendants but even getting a “deal” they were probably too much for what they were worth and then I got upsold on “having” to buy chains, which I did not realize was happening until the card came out. Ugh. You know someone’s a good salesperson when they get way more money out of you than you wanted to spend and you feel uncomfortable afterwards. Sigh. But ain’t no way I am going to argue with someone about this shit. At least I talked myself out of buying the other dresses I was eyeing, mostly because they were see through or awkward to wear or in the case of one vendor, she kept standing by the damn dress and she was SO attentive and watching my every move that I just wanted to leave.

Seriously, if I’m not committed to buying a thing, acting like that just creeps me OUT. I know it’s their job but I don’t need you asking me if I need help for 2 seconds and commenting on my selections and whatnot, I want some breathing room to think. Also, I do not like being called out and yelled at to come over by salespeople at these things, it freaks me out and I had no interest in buying their damn thing anyway. I go into the sales buildings to look at about 2 booths and the rest of them have such huckster shit I’d be embarrassed to go into their booths. Assuming I wanted that crap, which I do not.

* I saw cute baby llamas and alpacas.

* There were no sweaters in the fair this year, it was all toys, doilies and shawls and blankets. That is strange. I did see a wedding cake and umbrella, so points for those.

* They had a “silent disco” this year which I loved. They pass out headphones and have three different musical channels (my best guess were oldies/country = red, oldies/70s/disco = blue, modern pop/techno = green) you can listen to and dance around while they have a ball and lights and whatnot. Even though I was freaking exhausted the second time I went (according to the apps on my phone I walked about either 10 or 12 miles that day), dancing in there was fun. I don’t get to dance enough. I wish they would do this again next year and every year, but probably not.

* They were supposed to be having the “Weiner Nationals” today, i.e. dachshund racing, at the racetrack. Little did I know this was a thing they would do for 5 minutes per heat in between horse races. I have never bothered to watch horse races before and while they let anyone sit where they wanted to (unlike the Scottish Games near my hometown, which walls off the seating for pay) and it was nice and cool there unlike most of the fair, it takes 30+ minutes (at least) in between horse races, which lasted somewhere between 30 seconds and a couple of minutes if they bothered to use the whole track. This is officially even longer and more boring of a wait than if you go to a rodeo (3 seconds of riding the bull, 20 minutes to set up the next bull). I eventually gave up on waiting around to watch 1 dog heat per hour.

* “The Greatest Showman” was A Theme this year. I saw one dance show where everyone was dressed as different characters down to the bearded lady. I really liked that show, especially since the folks in it were...not your typical dancer bodies, ages, or genders, I’ll put it that way. That one was cool.

I later watched a costume contest at the horse area where horses and riders were dressed up. There was a ringmaster (later in the show below), Mary Poppins, a Headless Horseman, a little kid dressed as Spider-Man and his horse was draped in a spider web fabric and had pipes hanging off for legs, a mermaid with blingy horse (my favorite!), a dressed up cart that had a fake horse on the back that the announcer grudgingly said “well, I guess we didn’t say the horse had to be LIVE,” someone as some kind of hybrid of Alice in Wonderland characters...The costumes were great but they forced the poor contestants to stand around in hot costumes with no shade (and horses) for a half hour while they tried to decide who got awards. I felt sorry for them.

And finally, they did a horse show tribute to “The Greatest Showman.” For the record, I haven’t seen it as yet--I’m not great about going to movies that don’t involve superheroes because if you don’t get to seeing Star Wars/Marvel flicks pretty soon everyone’s spoiling them (Thanos, anyone?) and if you want in on the conversation, get to it. I wasn’t too aware of the movie except for when I was in Gumbo doing a dance number to “This Is Me.”

Therefore, I can’t vouch for the accuracy of anything, but....
* They had a romantic couple who did some horse riding and dancing/spinning on a hanging ring to “Rewrite the Stars,” which I liked very much.
* They had two guys lipsyncing very well (and doing some pommel work and horse work) to “The Other Side,” which I also liked very much.
* I was also blown away and getting chills from the “Come Alive” song. I bought all these songs online the next day, shocker.
* They had a girl in a giant white dress (in a horse stadium) singing “Never Enough” live. I think we all felt sorry for her having to schlep around in that dress in a horse stadium.
* Sometimes they were a bit crowded--I felt like the best action during one scene was taking place during one pair but then there were there others on horses trying to stand up on them and it wasn’t too focused.
* And I hate to say it, but...whoever was cast as the bearded lady was probably not enjoying this role. They also had the joy of schlepping around the horse arena in a fancy dress (barefoot?!), with a fake beard and having to hear shit like the kid behind me going “Is that a boy in a dress?” (Who knows any more kid, who knows.) I suspect they had a hard time finding a dress for the number because it looked like they had to fill in a lot of fabric where a zipper would normally go (been there, the curse of big ol’ boobs). But in general they did not look like they were enjoying being in this show and were kind of doing the bare minimum they had to do in the opening number and then having to do “This Is Me,” which could have been more of a showstopper with some verve. But...yeah, that is probably a hard role to find to get anyone to do, I am guessing, for the various aesthetic issues.

Anyway, I had a good time but was very tired by the end of the night.

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