Monday:

From the morning meeting:
(a) Lioness got a flat tire on the way home from camping
(b) Another coworker's dog may have eaten a rock while they were out kayaking.
(c) I saw my mom and got all weirded out and sad and mopey about it.
Who's wrong with this picture?
(d) Thankfully, Penguin Girl understood because she said her brother decided to randomly take off to go to LA, which led to the cancellation of her vacation to go visit her sister because sister didn't want anyone coming who wasn't taking precautions. So at least PG was feeling it too. Said she just spent the rest of the weekend watching videos and sitting in a kiddie pool. I hear ya. Grandboss made a crack about "we can't have her brother infecting her shoe collection."

Also per Grandboss: "When do you want me back in the office? Not for the foreseeable future." "Maybe January "was said, but hahahahay yeah right on that. We are going to have as few people around as possible, I think.

I nearly got myself into hot water with Grandboss today. Joy. I wasn't entirely clear as to what the heck they wanted me to fix (it sounded like, "fix X thing, then go key Y thing, which I have put in Z folder", except I couldn't find Z folder and then when she sent me the link to Z folder, Y thing wasn't in it) and then she was all, "Interesting. Please copy and paste exactly what I said that made you think that that was what I said." (WTF?) Then I apologized out the wazoo and she conceded that yes, she could see why I thought I was being asked to key Y thing immediately.

sigh

Other than that, just worked on addresses all day and kept emailing a guy to say "Hey, you have like, only 100 things wrong when normally when you send me the list, it's like 300. You should probably check that...." I really hated saying that because it will only cause me more trouble, but I don't want to get in trouble for something else either.

I got a text from PG&E saying they are likely to run blackouts from 3-10 p.m. for most of the week, please use less power, etc. So I have been sitting in the dark even more than usual at this point. Hey, as long as the computer keeps working.

People liked that I saved their amusing quotes and took screenshots, so that's a yay. Other than that, I have nothing to say about today. It's just another day to endure and exist in. Not horrible, at least, even if it's 110 outside (I ain't in it) and the world is literally on fire again, but that's just another day too.

Weird things I wish I had more of in quarantine:
(a) Pillows. Mostly because I am sick of sitting in kitchen table chairs. I don't wish for office chairs because I do not have room for them, but when you sit for all day and night, you want better pillows, and I am squishing most of them in the house.
(b) Wigs, for theater purposes or just hiding my pandemic hair.

Tuesday:

So last night was very blah and then I got the bright idea to read an old favorite romance novel, Welcome to Temptation. Seriously, I think it's about my favorite romance novel ever--that and Mr. Impossible. (Which I also want to reread, just haven't found where it is in the house yet.) It's just excellent and really took me away from the world, which I needed. Instead of just waiting for the hours to tick by while wasting my life here...I was theoretically going to go to bed early and then ended up staying up till the usual rereading this and going, "Awwww, Phin and Sophie are just so cuuuuuuute in their whole, 'I just want it to be about the sex but here we are snuggling on the porch while our relatives complain about us dating!'" thing.

I'm not sleeping much. I sleep well and then wake up halfway through the night and can't lose consciousness again unless I don't have a time to get up at the next day. Blech. Typical for me, but blech.

I dreamed I was at the karaoke bar except karaoke wasn't going on.

Work: I spent the day either proofreading addresses or attempting to address exhausting incomprehensible emails. I got through more of the pile, but the pile of shit I don't know how to do is large, urgent, and scaring me. I REALLY CAN'T HANDLE THE SPECIAL SHIT AND MY JOB TOO. I REALLY EFFING CAN'T.

PG&E has now helpfully put up a website of when you can expect to have a blackout. I'm not on the schedule today, but looks like I'm on to be blacked out circa 8 p.m. tomorrow, guessing from how the webpage looked. When I was going to be in storytelling Zoom performances. I guess I'll just phone 'em in, literally. And make dinner ahead of time....though I started making rice and then forgot oh, I think I'm not supposed to use the stove when it's 112 and on fire out? I turned off all the other lights, hope that compensates! But seriously, the hottest it gets inside here is at night when I have to turn on lights and/or use the stove. I'm a little confused on the blackout website because when I compare it to the outage website, I don't see any here? Though Vacaville, as usual, is blacked out... at Scott's house, again.

Talked to my therapist today but I don't feel like saying much about it. Mostly told her about seeing Mom and how I don't know how I feel about it. I pretty much feel like I was going to be forced to give in, but what I really hated was having to say no to her multiple times when it was hard enough to say no--to things I ABSOLUTELY WISH I COULD DO without risk of death--in the first place. We did discuss the whole DNR thing and how we can't really talk about it, mostly because I suspect she'd want to be strung out as long as possible and I disagree with that.

I got permission to "leave" work an hour early to watch Finish the Fight!, a performance about women's suffrage. Probably wouldn't have done that had I known it was going to be online later because I thought it was a one time streaming thing, but heck, you can watch it if you like apparently.

"The New York Times has commissioned “Finish the Fight,” a new production in which the acclaimed playwright Ming Peiffer (“Usual Girls”), the 2020 Obie-winning director Whitney White (“Our Dear Dead Drug Lord,” “What to Send Up When It Goes Down”) and a cast of celebrated actresses bring to theatrical life the biographies of lesser-known activists who helped to win voting rights for women. The play adapts the forthcoming book “Finish the Fight!: The Brave and Revolutionary Women Who Fought for the Right to Vote,” written by Veronica Chambers, a Times senior editor, and the Times journalists Jennifer Schuessler, Amisha Padnani, Jennifer Harlan, Sandra E. Garcia and Vivian Wang."

It more or less starts out with asking young women of color what they think suffragists were like, and the answers are kind of obnoxious like "bonnets," "women who don't have sex" and "rich" and.... oy. But then it gives five profiles of ladies from the book. My favorite--and going from the Q&A afterwards, she was a favorite for everyone--was Mabel Ping-Hua Lee, who is portrayed as a 'tudey teenager joining the suffragist movement and riding around on a horse. "Basically everyone got pissed when I joined the suffrage movement." I also liked Jovita Idar, the newspaper editor.

They did a Q&A afterwards on how adapting the book into a play was pretty different and they just ended up doing monologues in "liminal space" where the ladies could talk to each other. Mabel "was a favorite from the beginning." They also described the process of working on the show as "playing telephone with a piece of art" and "it's like collage."

Other than that, I am so bored that I am cleaning the bathroom voluntarily on a Tuesday night. WTF. Used up the rest of my Drano, which I wasn't able to replace last time I ordered from Safeway. Argh. Maybe I need to amuse myself like a Victorian.

I did hear from Shanna, because they are having a blackout where she lives. I made sure to check all the flashlights I could find after that.

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