Chaos Attraction

What The Hell Was I Thinking?

2019-09-30, 10:21 p.m.

What the hell was I thinking wanting to be in this show?

So theoretically Phase 4 of the Theatrical Universe started tonight: which is to say, Coney Island Christmas (from now on lazily abbreviated as CIC) rehearsals. Y’know, minus everyone who’s doing tech week in The Viewing Room, of course. So that boiled down to a lot of kids, a very few adults that I did not know, one kid I knew (Isadora, who got the role of Young Shirley after all) and.... yeah, that’s about it.

I got there tonight, they’re having rehearsal this week in an alternate location, and the fire alarm was going off. I do not chalk this up to my chaos magnet going off since clearly I wasn’t even in town or the one who set off the alarm, but it is the sort of thing that would make my pagan friends yell “All hail Eris!” about.

Maybe it’s a sign. Not a great sign, mind you (even though today I found four heart playing cards and someone drew a heart on a bench I walked by, so all the signs of that nature are still going on here), but I am wondering.

I have no idea if Robert is actually in this or not. He was certainly on the email list (as was Touchstone Jim) but he wasn’t mentioned tonight as to what his part was, if any. Is he even in it? Jim wasn’t there either, though for all I know he got emailed because he does publicity. Je ne comprends pas.

They cast older actors, or at least the guy actor (Trent somebody), for Mr. Abramowitz. He was very enthusiastic about the theater and did a good job on that one. Whoever got the Mrs. wasn’t there tonight but I guess she looks young because Anita said they’d have to use makeup or something. Scott of course got the role of Mr. Hilton. Upon hearing the dude reading his part for tonight, I was thinking, “Wow, this is going to be weird. Mr. Hilton is like...twinkly and cheerful.” Which uh, Scott so isn’t. This shall be strange, to say the least.

And who got Miss Glace? Cameron, of course. On the one hand: Cameron would be the only person you could cast for that role who can actually play a French Jew (turns out Miss Glace is Jewish) and look right for the part and probably does a better French accent than I do. Whereas I am a blonde Italian looking shiksa who is not so great on the accent. I could get a wig, but the face ain’t even close to Jewish or French. Really, she has to play it. On the other hand, seriously, didn’t she say she wasn’t going to be acting in this one?! Wasn’t she supposed to be doing some other thing in this show like assistant directing or whatever? Je ne comprends pas.

We read through the entire script. Since Cameron wasn’t there, I got to read Miss Glace. This gave me something to do because as the sideshow hawker, my actual “part,” I seriously did not even get to read all two of my own lines, because DUDES STARTED READING THEM FOR ME. WTF. I noticed that kids got cast in multiple roles and I have...the one...with two lines... that I didn’t get to read...

What is the point of me being in this? There really isn’t any point on a practical level. Now I know how Formerly Redhead Sarah was feeling when she dropped out of TnT.

I had reasons for wanting to do this show. I think the concept is funny. I need more experience. I want any excuse to ham up shit on a stage. And... well, if anyone was reading this*, they could certainly guess the rest of my motivation, which I am now kicking myself about as is. But now I am seriously pondering just dropping out after this week out of pointlessness (though I said I’d do Miss Glace the rest of the week) because who needs me? You could get any ol’ kid to do that one.

* which nobody is, and I really only write this and any other websites I do for my own amusement/ability to track shit for funny links or reviews or for storytelling later. It’s a lot easier than digging through my mixed up files.

That said, other than my semi ridiculous French accent, I think I did a very amusing/good job of doing Miss Glace tonight. I got some laughs, which was nice, and I think I sold her whole “I am an American and Shirley can do what she wants” little speech. She doesn’t have a lot to do, but let’s face it, almost everyone not playing a Shirley or the dad doesn’t get to do much in this. And still more than what I’ll actually be doing. One doesn’t want to wish for one’s friend to actually not be able to do her part and I would not be good at fitting the role otherwise, but I had brief thoughts of “hey, what if she got laryngitis and I could understudy” go through my head, and I’m ashamed of myself.

I really wished I could go to karaoke tonight* and drink. It’s not on tonight so I can’t, so I went home to drink. Seriously, this rehearsal made me want to smoke a bong and get stupid for the first time in my life, and since I have never had interest in smoking anything in my life, this is unusual.

* and sing "Little Girls" from Annie.

Funny lines from the night:

“Do Siamese twins have to be the same height?” -Anita
“Yes....?” Trent

“And pretend you know how to sing, Pilgrims.” -Anita

One of the shepherds misread the line “That’s ridiculous!” as “You’re ridiculous!” Hear hear, sir.

There is a song in the show in which the kids get to sing about asses. “Don’t get attached to that song,” said Anita.

“So by tomorrow you will all have your lines memorized, right?” -Anita

Just texted with Formerly Redhead Sarah about all this and she said "just stick it out," that she felt bad for not sticking it out in TnT, and "stick around. the magic will happen." Awww. Good one. I will try.

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