Chaos Attraction

Lambtown Sheep to Shawl

2019-10-06, 9:13 p.m.

Today I went to Lambtown. I usually show up to this in the last few hours of the event on the last day, but this time I actually showed up fairly early, so I got to see Sheep to Shawl, which was on Sunday this year. I know a few people on a team: my spinning teacher Debra and my knitting group buddy Alison, so I got to watch them start and finish. A team has four spinners, one plyer, one “gofer” who was dealing with the fiber in the back, one weaver (Alison) and an “educational” person who was there to explain what was going on. They have 4.5 hours to spin and weave a shawl from more or less scratch, and then it gets judged.

I ran into Vera and she’s still wearing tie dye, as was I because I decided to rewear the outfit from Friday since it was Lambtown. Everyone loved it. LOVED IT. About 3/4 of them thought I’d made the top because it’s lacy, but as far as I can tell it’s fabric rather than crochet, ah well.

I bought the following:
(a) Four craft books at $1 apiece, which inspired me to decide to design a vest out of the current fiddling project I am working on (this twist thing), which means I’m going to have to rip out what I did so far and make it larger.
(b) The rainbow and black yarn from this picture, which I have been eyeing since Stitches. I think I will use it to make this skirt.
(c) A shirt that says “Yarn Wench.” ‘Nuff said.

My favorite vendor, Colleen, was mysteriously missing. I hope she’s okay. Maybe just retired for all I know.

I briefly watched sheep dog trials but mostly they were doing sheep shearing demos instead. Watching the guy just grab the sheep by the fluffies and swing them around into submission was a damn hoot.

Everyone I knew there turned up at the end for Sheep to Shawl. There were seven teams this year. Two of them were disqualified for not finishing in time. A third was disqualified for being not long enough for regulations. And Alison’s team’s shawl... well. They were apparently hell bent on doing a fancy shawl that’s double layered and double woven, and it sounds like that had some issues the first time they tried it in May. The judge definitely gave bonus points in her brain for difficulty level ("for sheer chutzpah, these guys take it"), but it sounds like it got disqualified(?) for having mistakes on the bottom that there was literally no way for her to see. I’m sad for her since usually her team straight up wins. Maybe they were getting bored/cocky.

At one point the judge (whose nametag said "Da Judge") lost her tape measure and when someone asked where it was, someone said, "I hid it." The judge then hid it behind her own back. Also, some guy at the end (who was wearing a shirt from a disqualified team, so he was NOT the husband of someone on one of the top three, as others claimed) spoke up to ask why one team won and another one didn't, and after she answered, she said, "Sir, would you like the job?" This was quickly followed by "He's running away." Yes, yes he was.

I also met some interesting people, like a lady named Liz who had on an interesting shawl and amazing amounts of snark. She said my outfit was "covering up for my dull personality" and after I talked about the vest I wanted to design, said, "You're not as dumb as you look, are you?" and when I showed her the yarn I bought, said "You gotta get out of your rainbow rut." She amused me greatly.

I overheard a lady saying the following: "I don't want to discourage you from becoming a sheep farmer, but it's a lot of fucking work."

After that on my way out of town, I hit WalMart. I have been trying to find iridescent rainbow license plate frames and the Internet has been all “close but no cigar” on that one. I saw a possible frame that didn’t look shiny but was otherwise multicolored and while I was in the vicinity, I thought “what the hell, I’ll look.” THEY HAD IT. Totally shocked. Guess who I need to go ask to put those on. Though later I found some kind of engraving device for $2.99 so now I’m considering trying to engrave the things first? I also found two cute watches for $4, some needles, some pouches to try to incorporate into my Halloween costume, and another umbrella because I go through umbrellas like I do watches and all of mine are broken again.

Then I went back to town and well, hit Goodwill and bought myself a fairly decent brown wig for $10, along with a purple cloche hat. Do I need any of this? No. Do I think it'll make a fun disguise sometime? Apparently so!

I checked my email and as a member of the costume team, I got sent this video of another version of Coney Island Christmas. I thought of much snark, which I may email off to my friends.

(a) Clara is a Gryffindor in this one.
(b) I really look forward to making a giant turkey tail....somehow....I assume using things all bought from the Dollar Store from looking at this one.
(c) Miss Glace seems to have lost the French accent somewhere over the Atlantic? Also she only conducts kids with one hand while the other arm is doing a broken duck wing? Lord, she's not very good.
(d) I am definitely getting gay vibe from this Mr. Hilton. For once, that might be inappropriate in the theater since he and Miss Glace are supposed to be having vibe. Wait until you see the fortune teller bling outfit.
(e) Audience reactions 43 minutes in: "It's kinda cute." "It's not bad."
(f) "RUN SHIRLEY, RUN LIKE THE WIIIIIIIIIIIIND!" is my favorite moment. Yum, ham in a Jewish play.
(g) I love the "NO VACANCY" sign at the inn. Very authentic!
(h) Robert has to do better at Santa Claus than this girl did.
(l) The Three Wise Men have a bit of posing rapper vibe going on, somehow.
(j) "I'm the Ghost of Christmas Past, but I think we went too... far.... baaaaaack...." (flies backward with the arms or something?)
(k) I can't even with Ebenezer Scrooge, who really isn't even trying to look like a dude and whatever that is on her head....? I'm guessing a bald cap she wasn't bothering to actually wear?
(l) Never mind, the best moment is when Mr. Hilton dramatically chucks his paper microphone. And then outta nowhere, it goes all Beauty and the Beast-ish dance number.

I need to go do something bloody else now besides writing things....

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