Falling In Love With Objects
2003-10-09, 7:05 p.m.
In the bad news quota for the day, because we've got to have one, Dave got rejected for private health insurance. Par for the course, I suppose. Also, his best friend Jeremy is going around being a dick for no reason that he will state (it's presumed that Nikki is the reason), and his new girlfriend, who we're supposed to be visiting this weekend, is about ready to dump his prickly ass. Boy, that's gonna make the weekend fun.
I have decided to stick my head in the sand with regards to the whole job and money thing with regards to Dave. Every time someone asks me "Is he looking for a job? Is he ever going to go to school? What's he going to do now?" I start freaking out, getting all edgy, and bitching at him about what I think he should do, when really, it's his life and his decision and I don't have the right to whine and bitch when we do not share expenses yet. I'm tired of nagging him and having a cow every time he does something. So I'm declaring a moratorium on the anxiety. I cannot take it any more.
My "good luck" bamboo is dying. Is this a bad sign?
Incidentally, I got my Party Lite candles today, and Oh. My. God. The BEST smelling candles I've ever smelled in my life. I have a nearly defective nose, and I could smell them in their boxes from across the room. I LOVE that. Wowee.
It's October, and once again, the pain that is Buying Dad Birthday Presents starts. Mom whispered last night that he wants Bird on a Wire, which is great because normally he never wants a damn thing. I have yet to spot anything else he'd want, of course, and would have to order BoaW for $25 off Amazon, so the anxiety still continues.
Meanwhile, while in the bookstore, I found a billion things I'd want. I read through some "how to publish your first novel" literature and was about hit in the stomach by one agent saying, "You know what, just throw your first novel in a closet, no matter how good you think it is." I'm thinking that this idea of going for publication with mine is ludicrous now, and that I should throw that idea in the back of the closet with the novel. Might as well go LJ the novel or something if it's guaranteed crap right off the bat, eh?
I also found Sandman: Endless Nights and am currently whining that I want to buy it. I may go back and do so after I finish this entry and Survivor is over, because being a Good Girl and not buying something that I know I will get eventually at one point and another.
That thought actually leads me into what I wanted to say today.
I followed a link to this entry today and just adored it. That ring was destined for her. She loved it from afar all those years, waited for it to come to her the way diamonds are "supposed" to, it never did, and eventually she thought it was lost to her.
And then, one day she finds it. The very last one. And it fits her perfectly. Financially she shouldn't get it, but heartwise, how can she NOT? And she's never regretted it.
I am a big believer in "falling in love" with certain items. One expects to fall in love with people, and certainly some books, but other items, it's not necessarily a mental reference point.
It may not sound this way given how much I shop, but I have gotten pickier on what items I buy of late. When I go to something like the Harvest Festival, I've decided to only buy things that I've fallen in love with. If it's pretty, sure, gorgeous even, but I'll forget about it a few days from now, I can live without it. And I shouldn't buy it. If it's incredibly unique, if I can't get it anywhere else but here and now, that's another consideration in buying that will get me to pull out my wallet.
I am trying to stick to buying things that will haunt me; that if I don't get them, it will continue to bother me that I didn't buy it. Items like that are the ones that you were meant to have, cost be damned.
At any rate, I'm broke but happy, right?