Chaos Attraction

The Worst Good News, Bad News Ever

2018-10-24, 8:49 p.m.

So everyone in the shark tank had their private meetings with the BigBoss today. Mine went the worst.

Like this is the most "good news, bad news" day ever.

The person who used to bully me went first and was out in five minutes, presumably reassured that no, her ex-manager wasn't likely to get the job. Or so I am guessing because it was only five minutes.

My plan to suggest my old awesome manager flew out the window when the BigBoss came in a few minutes after that first meeting and announced that someone has to apply for the job and she can't just appoint someone (this seems odd). So I was all, okay, fine, I'll just address some other stuff. And it turned out not to matter in the end.

Because she's transferring me out of the shark tank. Back to public service. With That Manager who bullies people as my direct supervisor. And I'm not allowed to object to that. I'll have to go back to the same job I did before, and yes, that's phones and front counter, which everyone sure loooooves me doing. She claimed I wouldn't have to do that much of it and I was all uh, when I did that before I was told I would hardly ever have to do it and then we were constantly short staffed and doing it every single day. "Oh, they hardly do it any more, but I'll verify that."

(Note: I went to my old/future team after this and asked if this was true and they said that yes, they aren't doing phones much any more and only do counter once in a while...except they are doing it a lot when the front counter person is out, and they were asked to cover the phones while I was in there...OH JESUS JUST STRIKE ME DOWN WITH LIGHTNING NOW.)

I pointed out that I had reservations since I tend to inadvertently piss people off and with this person in particular it would be A Problem, and she was all "don't worry about it" and "you don't know all the details and don't believe everything you hear" and "her supervisor has been working with her."

Oh, and this is happening the second my boss is gone in 2.5 weeks.

I can't even be happy to get physically out of the shark tank because I have no idea when I can get physically moved out of the shark tank. She said she'd move me out and I said can I go back to my old desk and that sounded like a no because they were told it was ergonomically bad to squeeze that many people in there even though they've fit 3 people in a narrow office for years and it didn't bother me before. So I literally can't even leave there. I guess I'll have to work in the call center or the toilet, I dunno which.

And this manager does not like suggestions or improvements, so everything I've tried to improve at best will be at a standstill. Forget progress now.

Honestly, this is the worst news I've had since anything regarding my dad's disease and death. This is my fucking nightmare. Well, it's not quite as bad as the "fired, homeless and raped" one, but that one is coming.

My former bully hasn't heard this news yet but the guys did. I bet they will all be dancing around and singing "ding dong the bitch is dead" about this. It will make her fucking day tomorrow to know that I'm going to inevitably get fired now. She wins, she wins, she wins, and I am going to get fired, homeless and dead.

I had to tell my mother this news and she just wanted to be cheerful at me and tell me to look on the bright side and oh my god, I just could not take it. I can't even be happy about getting out of the shark tank because I don't even know when I will be out of their daily presence. I'll still have to sit there, answering the phones while they report me to my new manager. THAT'LL GO WELL.

Oh yeah, and the sharks are probably going to keep an aspect of my job that I like and am super experienced at, so that sucks. They don't even know how to do all of it because they fill in during one season a year.

I actively wish I was dead because that's the only way out of this. I seriously pondered running out in front of cars today on the way home.

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