Chaos Attraction

Another Day Of Drama

2018-11-01, 10:51 p.m.

Well, my day cannot possibly be as bad as my coworker's who found out on her son's birthday that he has heart failure. Which we unfortunately found out when someone else made an inadvertent joke that unbeknownst to us all, set her off crying. Oy. And that was just 8 a.m., y'all.

Today I found out that there are no public service employees around on Tuesdays and Thursdays so there are no people to answer the phones. You bleeping KNOW the first day I'm in that room I'll have to answer the phones immediately all day long "because we're so short staffed." Just shoot me now.

(Oh, and speaking of jokes one shouldn't say. I should probably not say that because at some point I'll probably make someone cry because their loved one got shot.)

I was job hunting again tonight, as usual am not thrilled with the options. I just need to get out but it doesn't seem possible.

Oh yeah, and I asked my mom if she wanted to go to the Hawaiian festival in her neck of the woods this weekend. She hedged that she didn't want to go because she should get work done and I was all fine, can I at least stay at your house, which she originally said fine to. Then she said the dreaded CALL ME DURING LUNCH (god, I don't want to, every fucking time she wants to talk during lunch we fight) and she started saying that if I'm going to get fired I should stop spending money and stop going to things. I said you're quite right, then I won't go.

See, I agreed with her and gave her exactly what she wanted. Then she starts going oh no, I don't want you to live in fear (something everyone keeps bringing up around me lately) and I said (a) too late, been doing it for six years now, (b) that is going to continue to happen as well, and (c) you're right, I should just stay home.

THEN she said I'll have to get rid of all of my stuff because if I have to move home she has no room, and that's when I started in on the hoarding and she started exploding at me and I very calmly said that I didn't want to keep discussing this and hung up on her.

Of course she's been frantically calling and calling and texting and texting and she called Mauricio and had HIM leave a message saying how sorry she was and I should go to the festival. I am refusing to respond, which probably means by 7:30 am. she will be threatening to call the cops to see if I am still alive. (Not joking.)

Why does she do that? Why does she say something like this and then when I agree with her and cave in, immediately backpedal and start yelling at me?

I am beyond tired of this game. I do not want to play. There is nothing she can say or do to make this better. Clearly she felt absolutely compelled to say what she said and meant it and wanted me to give in--so why then throw a fit when I do?

God.

If I go to the thing this weekend, I'll just drive down for the day and then go back without telling her. I don't know now because she has a point and I should be living in fear of firing and shouldn't be spending money--I've said it to myself. But god, why throw a fit over it? I'm tired of this. I am going to start the worst period of my life very soon and I don't need her drama too.


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