Another day, another disaster. Checking my sidebar list, it's been a few weeks since the last disaster occurred, so I guess we were due for the batch of disasters that have to start up for November. There's nothing like having a good night for once and then having it fucking quashed the next day. It's a good thing I don't really believe in karma, or else I'd think I come from a family of mass murderers.

(I am also listening to Dido and "Life for Rent" right now. Hence the title.)

Got home around elevenish from the auction last night to find a lovely message from Auntie Dolores saying to call the second we got in. Figuring that didn't mean "call us at midnight", Mom waited until the next day to find out the latest bad news.

We've been waiting around for Grandma to do something that'll justify calling adult protective services on her, and yesterday she done did it. She drove into a pole at the nearby gas station and totaled the truck. She came out of it with two black eyes and stitches across the nose. I guess Grandpa is banged up but otherwise not too injured. Naturally, they don't wear seat belts. The lovely thing about this story is that there was a GAS TANK behind that pole. If Grandma had hit it any harder, there could have been a huge fireball lighting up half of Anaconda, Montana.

Not that Grandma would give a shit if that happened, mind you.

Naturally, we didn't find out this had gone on because Grandma called and told us the news or anything. No, Auntie D. got two phone calls- one from the neighbor and one from Grandpa's friend Bernard- saying what had gone on. Bernard also mentioned that Grandma isn't paying the bills or going to the doctor any more and their garbage has been shut off.

Oh, and apparently Grandpa called the place where the TOTALED truck was towed to and asked them to put a new battery in it. Yeah, that'll work.

Now when D&B called Grandma, she said, "Oh, everything's fine, we went out to breakfast this morning." Naturally, she doesn't remember crashing the car, despite any er, physical pain she might be going through right now. When she got asked, "So, how are your two black eyes?" Grandma lost it at that point and was really pissed off she'd been tattled on from multiple sources. She dropped the F-bomb a lot and claims that we just want to kill her off for her money. (What money?)

Supposedly, D&B are going to call adult protective services on her. Course, considering that (a) they're going to visit Janelle, who just had her wedding anniversary and is naturally feeling miserable, tomorrow, and then (b) they have to come back to make Auntie D get physical therapy, and then (c) she goes in for a consultation about knee surgery on Thursday...well, I told Mom if she's got the number, she'd better make the call. Mom said she didn't have the power of attorney to do that. *sigh*

Dad's not going to get to hear about this news, at least.

Update, 5:30 p.m. Still at Mom's house. Pardon me if I bitch?

She STILL hasn't gotten her stupid beloved couch and loveseat she bought last Christmas delivered to the house yet, and she is taking tomorrow off from work to work on the auction crap. She kept saying all through Friday and Saturday that she should call the furniture store and have them deliver the furniture while she was home all day. I nagged her and nagged her to put in her order for tomorrow or else she'd never do it. So she calls them around 11, and they are all, "Hey! Why don't we deliver it for you TODAY?" and Mom is all, "That's just grrreat! Go right ahead!" and they were all, "Fine and dandy! We'll deliver it between 4 and 6 p.m.!"

At which point she gets off of the phone and I'm all, "Excuse me? TODAY? Don't you realize what horrendously bad timing it is to have them deliver it TODAY between 4 and 6, i.e. when we need to leave to get my ass back home?" Not to mention that she'd been going on about how she needed to go pick up stuff at 3 or 4 different places today AND clean up the living room before the furniture people came over AND work on the auction stuff, and then there's the whole "we must visit Dad daily or we're shitty people" thing...

And she just blithely shrugs it off and says, "Well, at least I'll get the delivery over with!"

So it takes her all day long to rearrange her crap so that the living room has enough space to put the couch in. though there is STILL NOT ENOUGH ROOM IN HERE FOR A FUCKING LOVESEAT (honest to God, I don't care how much you are in love with a fucking couch, if you have to buy it with a loveseat that you don't have the room for and have to get rid of a third of your furniture in order to fucking fit both pieces into your house, IT AIN'T WORTH THE TROUBLE. It's not like it's leather or angora or velvet either, for chrissake.). It takes her so long to do that she doesn't get any of the errands done she was going to do either.

Especially since going through her crap means that either she starts reading papers at the speed of slow or finding crap of my grandparents' and then moping and crying over it. (For example, "I just found this camera of your grandfather's and your aunt has always wanted it and she's asked me about where to find it for years and she's the one that does photography and I don't even know how to operate it, but I want it, and...waaaah! What should I dooooooo?" I can't speak for her, but that just made me want to pop some more Excedrin. Not to mention feel glad that as the only child, I'll never have to deal with the "but my sibling wants this and I want it too" games.) And given that it's nearly 5:45 as I type and THEY STILL HAVEN'T SHOWN UP YET, not only am I going to be getting home around midnight, she sure as hell won't be able to squeeze in tonight's guilt visit to Dad and then she'll cry some more. While driving. On the freeway. In the dark.

I love my mom and all, but (a) she has NO SENSE OF TIME WHATSOEVER, NOT A CLUE, (b) her priorities are what a teacher of mine back in the day would classify as "fuzzy mess", and (c) she's so easily distracted that trying to get her to get anything done outside of work/volunteering...well, it's easier to herd cats.

Oh well, at least I'm FINALLY back on track (and a bit ahead) for NaNo after waiting around all day.

Update, 6 p.m.: They showed up at 6 on the dot. Much to my surprise, they have managed to fit both pieces of furniture in the house (barely).

Mom is still convinced that we have plenty of time to see Dad.

*sigh*

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