Chaos Attraction

Happy Nothing Special Is Going On Day

2022-12-15, 6:56 p.m.

In-office day. I proofread addresses, did emails, wrote a silly bit for potential Christmas cards if I ever sent any. I went to lunch with my friend Rachel and we caught up on all the shows we've been doing and how the strike is going--it's officially over for her. Afterwards she sent me their Christmas playlist they do every year, which came along with a holiday letter that cracked me up with lines like "he developed a distinguished limp and had the opportunity to visit many medical professionals" and "Even though Rachel is a research scientist, she's a member of the auto workers union, because that makes sense," and referring to her being in Madagascar, "she played a zookeeper, foosa, and dancing steak." Ergo, I wrote a list of all the "parts" I played in musicals, ranging from "fancy dressed lady" or "poor lady" or "misc. wives" to stuff like "girl gang" and "dancing fork" and "Nazi, because at some point everyone in theater plays a Nazi."

It's Jess's birthday today, but since she's fed up with birthdays and holidays, I sent a "happy nothing special is going on" day email, which led to silly conversations about corgis and my sending her and Mike the Christmas card draft. They were amused.

Packagegate: our printer lady is fed up with all of our stupid package drama, I think, because SHE moved the mailing address to the nearest UPS store without asking permission. She said UPS was just going to return it again. On a related note, UPS's returned package came here, so that's being sent to mail services while I'm out. I doubt they'll pick it up while I'm out, but at least the joint will hold it. SO WE'LL SEE if any show up before I'm gone.

It was a pleasant day, except for being told that we have to have ANOTHER meeting, with OldBoss, about my performance review. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY I ALREADY KNOW I'M THE WORST, DO WE HAVE TO CONSTANTLY KEEP DISCUSSING EVERY SINGLE FAILURE IN GREAT DETAIL?!? But we have to get it in before you leave!... kill me now.

Robert may or may not go tomorrow, what wit still being sick...oy. I don't know what to think there, I asked if he was still infectious and got "unclear, probably not" according to the doctor....yeah, maybe he should stay home. He says Janene is going no matter what though. Well, there's one person...

I've been watching (since like 5:30 a.m., grr, I keep waking up early) the Harry and Meghan series. I am Team Sussex all the way, so I'm glad they're getting their truth out, especially the shitty behavior of Charles and William. I admit I get angry on their behalf. I'm not going to recap them all because PLENTY of others are going to and you can look that up if you like, but good for them I did watch "Harry and Meghan: Escaping The Palace" last night, which starts out cheesy AF with bad lines ("He's the king of the castle, I'm the dirty rascal") and super divey/hedgey William and Kate and some made up bitch named "Victoria" and the Queen comes in for one scene and doesn't do much (guess that was like real life). I was going to recap it for the lulz, but then it just felt more and more serious and I stopped taking notes.


Hallmark reviews!

All Saints Christmas:

Lisette Toussaint is a famous singer with a famous musician dad who broke up with her boyfriend Matthew a few years ago, after refusing to bring him home to the family. They run into each other in public and her ring falls off, which he picks up and gives to her, albeit his back freezes up in A Certain Position. This leads to them getting their picture taken and everyone writing up that they're engaged and a reporter from her hometown of New Orleans is coming over to stalk her and the family for Christmas. Since this suddenly becomes a massive career boost for Lisette (as some teenage rival of hers is getting a publicity bump from dating someone else), she's all "hey, let's be fake engaged!" Matthew seems baffled, but goes along.

I'm amused at the gag of her mother's fruitcake being WAY TOO FULL OF BOOZE THAT HAS NOT BAKED OUT WHEN SHE SAID IT DOES. The kids refuse to eat it and are all 'we used to hide it in the plants until it killed the plants."

Anyway, this is mostly one of those "hang out doing pleasant Christmas things" movies, so I don't have much to recap about it. I note that he used to produce at least one record of hers and she's with a different company and so is he, and his business partner is all "HOO BOY WE IN THE MONEY WE SCORING HER AS A CLIENT NOW" and Michael is all "dude, I love her, I'm not in it for that" and the partner announces to everyone that she quit her label (which isn't treating her well anyway, see above) and there's the third act small breakup drama. She quits her label but doesn't sign to his right off to sing at dad's business for awhile.

The singing is lovely, the family seems sweet, this is a pretty chill, pleasant one to watch with great sound. Three and a half stars.


The Royal Nanny:

This is one of the best Hallmark plots I've ever seen, as it has a nice balance between "hang out and do fun Christmas things and give each other the eye" and MI5 action. Also, Claire and Colin are legitimately cute as heck every time they look at each other, d'awwww. It is a cross between Mary Poppins, Miss Congeniality, and the Parasol Protectorate books (I do hope someone's mentioned this movie to Gail Carriger).

I note this takes place in an alt-universe England where Charles/Wills/Harry/etc. are nowhere to be seen, but Frogmore, Sandringham, etc. are being lived in, and Princess Rose is the firstborn heir with two nice-if-prank-y children and a husband off with the military, and Prince Colin is happy to be spare and primarily work on his children's charity. But someone working for the charity has been spying on the family, and agent Claire Champion is subbed in as the new royal nanny to keep an eye on everyone.

She's sent to a high class nanny school (I seriously read about one that exists recently, Norland) for 24 hours of training, where the lady who runs it is nicknamed "Scary Poppins" (by Colin, her old charge) but is very nice AND has contacts all over through her nanny school and generally gives the impression she's some kind of secret agent contact. Plus she teaches you to fight with an umbrella. Claire is basically all "I grew up in foster care, I don't have kids, I'm not around kids" but she seems to get along fine with them. She later mentions being an older kid in foster care and looking after other ones, which presumably led to her current career and gave her a lot of experience in thwarting otther's pranks, which she does to great effect with the royal children and the royal uncle by making sure the spaghetti is dumped on his head rather than hers.

Anyway, Claire is fun and not above a bit of pranking herself, so she hits it off with everyone and everyone loves her, but there's that whole impending kidnapping plot...which is why frankly this was the most interesting Hallmark Christmas movie of all time and not just the ol' "save the business" plot. Actually it turns out to BE a "save the businses" plot, but one involving royal kidnapping and Claire using an umbrella and marbles to excellent effect. And the romance is cute as shit and they are really going for that kiss at the end as the doors close.

Four stars! One of the best this year!


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