Blue Hawaii Day
2010-12-17, 11:42 a.m.
Before I begin today, let me share with you this: "I hate the holidays! I'm alone and miserable, you fucking dumb bit of toy!" Yeah, I'm in need of a meme today, and it's too rainy to do anything interesting. I saw this entry awhile back and thought, "Invent your own holiday. I like this idea."
My thoughts on this subject:
So, what to do?
If you think about it, holidays can be classified into the following groups, designated by their #1 purpose:
Party/food/drink holidays: New Year's, St. Patrick's Day, Thanksgiving.
So, what are the most fun holidays on this list for sheer partying? The ones involving face stuffing, outfits, and fire. Okay, so fireworks are probably out for a January party. But how's about...
The decor: Hit the dollar store or party store for cheap crappy island decorations, which you can usually find all year round in the birthday section. Inflatable trees, fake tie-on coconut bras, leis, pirate hats, whatever you can dig up. Cheapness is mandatory. Have a $5 or less rule for all decorations and they must look as bad as possible. If anyone's got any Iz albums (or if you're me, went out and bought Hawaiian pop music the last time you went there), put them on.
The wardrobe: The aforementioned cheap plastic leis and coconut bras. People must dig up whatever Hawaiian shirts are hidden in their summer wardrobes, fish them out, and put them on over their three layers of sweaters. If you've got a sarong, tie it on over your snowpants. The sillier, the better. (If you live in California, you're probably still dumb enough to be wearing your flip-flops and board shorts in the pouring rain anyway, so you guys are covered for wardrobe.)
If someone's willing to really crank up their heat, it'd be fun for folks to actually be able to throw off all their layers and wear those clothes as the sun god intended. But that's up to you and your heating bill and finances. Maybe pass around a hat for donations if everyone wants to be warm for a night.
The booze: all the fixins required to make a Blue Hawaii, of course, and any other tropical beverages you like. Cheesy umbrella drinks for everyone!
So, basically you're gonna dress and drink like it's July in January and brighten the hell out of a shitty month. How's that for an awesome needed holiday?