Today I got told that we're taking a bunch of FAQ stuff off our webpage--specifically saying, "We can't order X, Y, and Z, please contact Other Offices for that"--because BigBoss "feels very strongly that we have to be Positive." To which I was all, "so they're just going to send in their money, asking for something we can't offer, and that's okay with you?" Apparently, yes. I think this was one of those "my boss got overruled" moments there. Seriously, the fuck.

On a not particularly related note, she said it was Picture Day last week. One kid had to go into school for the photo and they only TOOK one photo. The other kid was photographed at home, and then she noticed that he forgot to button a button. I was all, you can crop that out. Also, one of her kids was notably slacking at science last spring, to the point where they had to spend all Memorial Day weekend doing science makeup. Now the kid actually likes and "is engaged in" science. My boss was all, "Who is this kid?!"

Other than that, it was a chill day, and the phone wasn't brought up. Unfortunately, some random guy called ME when he was trying to call Lioness to ask about something financial. I had no effing idea, of course, and was all THE NIGHTMARE HAS ALREADY STARTED. And since unfortunately this guy found a live one, he kept calling me (sadly, the Jabber works Just Fine and everyone can call me!) until I finally bothered Lioness enough to get back to him, sigh.

I already have Yet Another International who keeps emailing saying they dropped out of some other international program and we have to get it off their record ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!! or else they can't get into some other international program, and we have no record of this dropping out in the first place and it definitely is before my time in this area of the job, so hell if I know. My boss and I have tried contacting people at this office and then this one keeps freaking out that we haven't responded and I keep saying the tactful equivalent of THEY HAVEN'T WRITTEN US BACK YET EITHER, I KNOW YOU ARE IN A RUSH BUT I CAN'T EXACTLY GO TO THE LADY'S HOUSE AND MAKE HER GIVE YOU AN ANSWER EITHER, nor can I make anyone answer their phones, which was today's complaint. I'm sure it doesn't help that the lady running said program is out for like 3 weeks and my boss had to look for other random people to try contacting either. Guess what, we can't get a "live one" either.

Things I don't enjoy dealing with: international clientele drama and finances. Things being forced upon me in this job over the years: same.

In other news, Jackie's grandma is doing better and I got a "Hi, how are you?" video from her (obviously Jackie filmed/sent it). Awww!

I love this video theme, also talks about S names. Hah. Supposedly in ten days something will happen....yeah right, I just wish. But it has like, all my symbols in it (feathers, keys, locks, hearts) and...well, I wish.

I have nothing else to do with my life, so back to The Crown, season 2:

Episode 1: Misadventure: in which Philip is gone, but his affairs live on.
Elizabeth and Philip are on the royal yacht (there's paparazzi in the rain who clearly can't see shit, so why are they doing that), marital spatting. Since divorce isn't an option, what will it take? What do you want to make this work, she asks him. Ohhhhh, this takes place after Philip's 5 month tour.
Flashback time. Things were doing a lot better, with actual affection going on. "Come back to bed." "No, darling, I've got 20 star jumps to do." DUDE, JUST GET LAID ALREADY. He takes the hint.
Elizabeth wants to leave Philip a little gift in his suitcase and finds some picture of another woman, a ballerina. And then the Suez Canal offices got seized. I AM NOT IN THE MOOD TO HAVE A LECTURE ON THE SUEZ CANAL RIGHT NOW!!!! Elizabeth thinks, and stomps off in mid-lecture.
Charles is told to say goodbye properly. He assumes that's a handshake. Philip is all "we're not in front of the cameras now" and permits hugging.
Elizabeth left a note: "Always remember you have a family." "I can see a conspiracy to drive me insane is well underway."
Margaret has a hangover and doesn't like having an unexpected lunch invite from her sister. Margaret points out that Mike the private secretary (who I guess we are supposed to care about now?) likes to hook you up with hot chicks.
Whoever Lady Mountbatten is, she MAD, dude.
"Speak your mind." "Well, I'm not really supposed to do that."
"Everything that should have been hot was cold," Dickie says, not liking the food at the palace. I thought that was how British food went?
"We both married a wild spirit...You put up with anything."
Elizabeth, don't go to the ballet to check out the girl. You're categorically not going to feel better if you do that. At least she skips meeting her.
Oh, the HORROR in her eyes before she spits out, "The Prime Minister ALWAYS has the sovereign's support."

Episode 2: A Company of Men: in which Philip has a good time until a reporter buzzkills him.

I guess Matt Smith got most of last week off, so this week it's Claire Foy's time off. Lots of men in clean white uniforms. Mike Parker the horndog secretary is recounting all of their exploits to his entire horndog club back at home, which a dude reads out sleazily. "Everywhere we've gone, we've had our own small scale Olympics." While there's no Queen, EVERYBODY PARTIES!!!!!!!! "In New Guinea, there is no such thing as infidelity!" "By the end of this tour, I think we'll be able to make a qualitative assessment about where the finest women in the world come from." And also, pass around a LOT of venereal disease. My soul needs a shower now.

To his credit, Philip does try to phone home, but has a bad line. "Damn telephones." "This is why I don't bother," says shitty Mike who doesn't even bother to call his kid on her birthday in the last episode. Mike's wife wants a divorce. "You'll need one of the big three: adultery, unreasonable behavior or insanity." She hits up a waitress at the Thursday Club, who (yup) banged him, not knowing he was married.

Eden is bugging off to Jamaica for his health. Elizabeth seems a bit skeptical of this. Eileen Parker's divorce dreams are making their way around the rumor mill, apparently.

Philip has gone into this interview being all "I'm going to bone this hot blonde," (seriously, his leering!) but she is all "What about this war here?" and "What about the horrors that happened to your dead relatives?" and "Wait, what, my mother had a breakdown?!" and "Oh yeah, don't you have Nazi sisters?" Philip stomps out, grumbling "Don't let my vanity get in the way of me again!"

The waitress won't testify and court, and the secretary men won't let Mrs. Parker get a divorce in case anyone figures out that Philip is banging around. They're going to have...a beard growing competition. Um, I was expecting orgies, not this. Philip is being forced to make a Christmas speech about the importance of family and he can't say no.

They pick up a random dying man in a tiny boat and Philip wants to bring him home. The captain just wants to dump him off somewhere randomly. I give Philip points for this, if nothing much else. The hugs, awwww. The waitress filches one of Mike's letters to the club for Eileen. Good luck, indeed. "Is that really Philip? Or some kind of Philip impersonator?"

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