Chaos Attraction

Good Luck Rituals

2023-12-31, 6:42 p.m.

Here is how today went, up until I went out to Winters for NYE. I'll update that tomorrow.

Today: woke up at 7 a.m., which was nicely late on my befucked schedule these days. I note that I was...shaking...this morning and that freaked me the hell out, but that seems to have worn off or at least Rae didn't notice it and she probably would have if I'd kept it up. So, whew?

While reading in bed, I saw some crackassed New Year's Eve articles about luck, and frankly, decided I wanted to do some of the things. Such as wearing red underwear, which I do not own, and this whole "eat twelve grapes for love" thing, to which I was all, I WANT TO DO THIS, followed by "um...I'm gonna be in public in a giant dress at 11:59 p.m., is this even feasible to climb under a table?" (Probably not?) I decided to make a Target run for both items, because I need some luck for this upcoming hell year that I dread, no question. Hell, some article said "don't eat chicken at New Year's" and I'm avoiding eating chicken and I eat so much chicken I cluck, y'all. I ate soup all day. Not chicken noodle.

I spent the morning finishing up Rae's gifts and just as I'd gotten that wrapped, she called me wanting to hang out. I mentioned Target and she wanted to go. She of course wanted some red underwear too....and I was all, "this is going to be interesting to explain to your mother." (Her reaction: "well, at least she didn't tell you she didn't have any.") I got that and the grapes, WHICH ARE HUUUUUUUUUUGE and that's going to be another problem, then we went to Panera and had her open her Christmas gift there. Thank god, she loved it AND she could tell what it was right off the bat, which I had...concerns...about.

I will note that she mentioned unicorn mermaids and Ariel in her party discussion today, so the birthday gifts will work out. She also got a large African-American Ariel doll at Target--a pretty magnificent one, really, it has GREAT hair--so now I feel relieved that my 50-50 "do I make African-American Ariel or white Ariel" debate panned out. I can't even recall how I made that decision at this point (maybe I assumed she had an AA one?), but now she has a set, more or less. I have the skin tones for both dolls but after looking at Rae's stuffie, that doll has such amazing hair I think I would have been hard pressed to replicate it. It's a mix of multiple strands and colors, and I can't find the thing online (seriously? grr) but it looks very cool.

After that we went to Boheme, where she fell in love with a giant unicorn/castle wall hanging, yes, I caved in and got it, and also got a dachshund bag I found for Dawn. Then we had ice cream and went to her house for an hour to watch videos. I note that when I got there she couldn't find her remote control and asked me to help her find it. I got the bright idea to say, "Hey, St. Anthony, can you find her remote?" AND THEN SHE LITERALLY OPENED A DRAWER AND FOUND ONE. Then it turned out that that one didn't work (must need new batteries) and she indicated there were other remotes, so I said, "Hey, St. Anthony, apparently there's more than one remote...." AND THEN LIKE THIRTY SECONDS LATER I FOUND THE REST OF THE REMOTES, hidden by stuffed animals by the TV. So that's hilarious, right there.

Why doesn't this trick work with love or jobs, I'd like to know? Probably because those things are impossible to find.

I was going to hang around until Rae's mom got there at 2, but she was running late and didn't make it. However, she did call me to let me know she got me a gift certificate...to Scott's store, because remember how we were going to go over there awhile back and then her son had some phone drama and it never happened? Well, she'd like to reschedule sometime and, um....I do not know what to say to this, now. At bloody all.

I went home for my singing lesson, still working on "Fifty Percent" for the audition. She said to lean into the acting and the technique would come, I'm still kind of not getting the long note at the end half the time and effing up the rhythm at the end a bit on my end, she wants to nitpick some of the sounds I'm making...I don't feel totally like I've got this down, but also it doesn't matter because I could sing "Happy Birthday" or fucking opera and still get ensemble, so whatever.

After that, I showered, put on the red underwear, fruitlessly went through town looking for SMALLER GRAPES, which did not exist, and then the battery on my key fob went out and I tried to make an emergency run to the hardware store...which, of course, was already closed. The good news is, I have a spare fob, the bad news is it's probably also dead because last time this happened both batteries ran out at once even though I was only using one of the things. I CAN'T GET IT FIXED AT NEW YEAR'S, GRR, ARGH....at least I know of where the key's embedded in the thing if I have to use it.

Page 2 is this year's New Year's Eve meme.


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