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Let It Go - 2020-12-07
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Cast list as of November 2019
I liked this plague times meme list and shall do it myself:
Day 1 of serious isolation behavior: March 18 after I was permitted to work from home.
First trip you had to cancel. I didn't have anything officially scheduled that I had to cancel, probably going to anything around St. Patrick's Day and the Scottish Games for events.
Other trips canceled: I would have gone to Sierra Storytelling, Renaissance Faires, Hawaiian faires, craft fairs.... I didn't have real trips scheduled as of yet though that I lost money on/physically had to cancel.
Last trip out of town before isolation. I went to Pantheacon and Stitches West in February.
Have you been out of town overnight since isolation? Nope.
Furthest from home since isolation. I went to my mom's house, so an hour and a half away.
Last Plane Ride in the before times. When I went to San Diego in September.
Ridden plane since? No, see above.
Last Meal sitting in a restaurant before Isolation. March 7, Ocean Chinese Restaurant, with Jim and Ashley from karaoke. God, I think back upon that.
Have you eaten a meal in a restaurant since isolation? No.
Inside a restaurant? No, see above.
First event you didn’t attend due to virus. St. Patrick's Day karaoke.
First event you cancelled due to virus: I canceled on going to a crafting party at Dawn's because we stupidly didn't finish and thought we were going to be able to have another night of it.
Date and event of last over 200-person event: Stitches West, last weekend of February.
Last live music event: I don't remember the exact date, it was going to see Willie K in Rancho Nicasio in December.
Things you are eating more of since isolation: My own cooking, sigh. Garlic bread, eggs, stuffing, rice.
Things you are eating less of since isolation. Fresh foods in general since I only get groceries every six weeks. Salad. Restaurant food, see above.
Non-perishable things you have purchased in isolation:, New laptop that can handle green screen Zoom backgrounds, Baby Yodas (four so far), card making craft kit, patterns, books, yarn, some hippie happiness pills I haven't eaten yet to see if they work, a Baby Yoda Christmas sweater, face masks, a Remington Steele DVD, craft eyes, the Transformation Game, a Brita water filter I still haven't bothered to open or use. I don't like them but figured I'd better have it around in case I run out of drinkable water (water out of the tap here is...not).
What restaurants have you gotten take-out meals from? None. I'm afraid to eat "outside food" that hasn't sat around for 3 days, still, despite updated warnings, and I just want to have as little contact with other humans as possible so I can't justify takeout for myself.
Have you found yourself bored in isolation? No, been entertaining myself for years.
Have you gained or lost weight? I have no idea, I don't have a scale and I no longer wear pants with zippers so who gives a shit.
Do you feel you are in better shape or worse shape? Eh. I miss being able to exercise better and more frequently than I can do in-house, can't go to the gym, and I've only been outside walking once in the pandemic and I can't say I was really enjoying that. But I don't feel out of shape either. I am definitely inclined to exercise less though.
What exercises are you doing? All I do is walk around the house for 90 minutes and/or sometimes try to lift weights with water bottles. I tried online Zumba, but in all honesty, dancing in my house during a pandemic is not fun anymore.
Do you drink alcohol? Yes!
If so, more or less in isolation? Probably about the same, my drinking usually depends on how bad my work day has gone.
What kinds of drinks have you had? Bottles of grape(?) wine and pink moscato from Safeway. Whatever random tiny bottles of weird alcohol I've had around the house for years, like blackberry....something, tiny vodka bottles that are so harsh I have to water them down, whatever.
What entertainments have you explored? LOTS of streaming video and online plays. LOTS of YouTube. I got addicted to Pick-A-Card tarot readings online about my imaginary love life.
What are your sources of entertainment? YouTube, Hulu, Netflix. frndlytv, Disney+.
How many books have you read? Maybe about 11-12? Okay, I just counted my book blog and it's more like 24. That's better than expected. There's a lot of "not finished" in there too.
More or less book reading than usual? Less because I used to read while walking, hanging out outside, during lunch, etc.
Have you done crosswords? Online ones, yes.
Played board games? Once, the Transformation Game with Meg on my birthday since I got my own board and we could play that over the Internet that way.
Done jigsaw puzzles? No, I don't have table space to do one here, my table is covered in computers now.
Have you cleaned out some cabinet, drawer, closet, etc. thoroughly? No, I did the yearly industrial clean in January and frankly haven't felt the urge since. My closet could use a cleanup, but these days, WHY BOTHER.
Did you find anything interesting? See above.
Are you spending about the same amount of money? Definitely less money since I am not going anywhere. I actually have more disposable income these days than I did before, which is odd. Not spending money on gas except every 3-4 months, not making weekly trips for groceries, not going anywhere to shop, not going to any events. This is why I've occasionally done crazy shit like buy a 1000 piece Baby Yoda Lego set (wait until Christmas!). I've also donated more money to people/theaters/politics than ever before, which is very weird for me.
Done Zoom, Facetime, etc. meetups? Yes.
Done outside walks? Only once, because I had to get the oil changed on my car and I couldn't wait inside the waiting room any more. Not fun to do in 30 degree weather at 8 a.m. and I don't like having to worry about making sure I move away from other people.
Kept a paper journal? Yeah, I have like...three of those outside of this online journal? Project-related.
Followed COVID information. Constantly.
Sources? NYT (have access for free), Washington Post (subscribed), The Atlantic (subscribed), Vox, Buzzfeed News, basically the entire Internet that isn't behind paywalls.
Had a social occasion with a small group of people you consider safe? I don't like the "small group of people you consider safe" bit of that, but yes, I finally caved in and did one this fall. So far nobody got it.
Did you vote? Of course.
In Person? On Election Day? Heck no, via mail as I always do, weeks ahead of time, though I did drive my ballot a few blocks over to the nearest dropoff box to make sure this year.
Might I suggest some others to add to this meme?
Are you living alone or with others? 100% alone. I've made myself yarn pets.
How have you changed mentally since this pandemic started? I cried a lot for months. My brain has been quite scrambled. It's better than it was at the start, slowly improving, but it's still not great. I'm a lot more paranoid and freaked out and crazy than I used to be. I'm afraid of having contact with other human beings and became mostly agoraphobic due to that. I'm afraid of the outdoors because people are there that can't be controlled. I don't like who I'm becoming. I leave my house every two weeks to do the following: (a) take out trash, (b) go to the mailbox, (c) drive the car enough so that the battery doesn't die. You have to drive it for something like at least a half hour with some speeds over 50 mph, which explains the times where I've left the house. I order $350-ish worth of groceries every 6 weeks, mostly nonperishables, and have them delivered so I have as little contact with others as possible. I live in pajamas and bathrobe/sweats/workout clothes most of the time, sleep in them, roll out of bed 15 minutes before work starts and don't bother to change because well, why? Who's seeing me?
How are you sleeping compared to the beforetimes? About the same, really. I wasn't a consistent'/great sleeper before and I'm still not, but not having to get up by 7:10 to get to work by 8 has helped me a LOT. I'm not exhausted and 'falling asleep" in work meetings any more, but also I can look at the computer and knit and things like that during them too without anyone bitching that I'm not sitting perfectly still and staring at them for an hour.
How many people from the beforetimes have you seen in person since it started? (I'm not counting medical professionals for this one: just people you would have seen in regular life.) My mom, Dawn, Loretta, Reggie the neighbor, another one of my neighbors, my friend Jackie's cousin dropping stuff off, apartment manager, Ashley and Jim, Scott and his mother. Wow, that actually went over two hands and makes me sound a lot saner than I actually am.
Have you touched anyone other than medical professionals/people you live with since it started? Scott, even though I know I shouldn't be doing that.
Have you made any new friends online since it started? Yes, several, mostly through online plays.
Have you started doing anything interesting/unusual hobbywise since it started? Yes, doing plays online, even a green screen one.
Have you started doing anything interesting/unusual cookingwise since it started? Yes. Drinking old booze, eating food in the house that's expired--so far only the nuts were inedible. I also started making omelets with mushrooms and ramen and sometimes potato chips in there....yes, that's weird, this is what happens if I look at recipe websites.
What do you do that's pandemic good behavior? I wear masks if I go anywhere other than my own patio, I go out as little as possible (not quite as good as I used to be, though) and only do things outside if I absolutely have to, almost all of the time. I'm not seeing my mom for the holidays. I wash my hands any time I touched something like a package, and anything coming into the house that doesn't require me to immediately deal with it like cold goods sits in the house for 3 days before being touched. I do Silkwood showers any time I've had to go out. I do handwashing in the sink/shower and I don't ever go to the laundromat and I try to dirty as few clothes as possible so I just wear the same clothes for days on end since I'm not around other humans any more.
What do you do that's pandemic bad behavior? Go to Scott's store and hang out and talk to him in person and hug him. I caved into seeing Dawn and Loretta and my mom (all over 60) at a distance. I did not successfully keep distant enough from my mother, who doesn't do too well with that stuff. I don't put on a mask to go out on my patio, most of the time. I probably don't need to since I'm not even close to anyone, but still.
What actually works better for you in a pandemic than in the beforetimes? Work in some respects is better, at least with regards to my physically being tired less, being able to knit/fidget without complaints, being able to go start dinner at 4 p.m. when I'm already hungry. I get more quiet. I can get ahold of almost anybody a whole lot faster online than having to hope the boss is in her office or whatever. I can also schedule a lot of stuff literally back to back online because there's no commute time, and I can do activities on the East Coast as well.
On a related note, I present to you this music video.
This morning's work meeting, all quotes from my boss about how we were allowed to not work for 2 weeks and now still have to work again:
"It's the (giant org) way."
"Thanks to 2020 for being resilient again and rising to the occasion."
"I'd love to say I have answers, but I don't."
"This is December 2, so who knows at this point?"
Hope asked what she'd have to do if she worked during "break" and Lioness trotted out a giant list of disasters and panic and phone calls. Joy. Also, Lioness complained that she didn't feel well while at her mother's last week and I was all !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Boss at the end of the meeting: "Hope some of you feel better that don't feel so great right now."
I'm annoyed AF that I ordered my mom some presents from Amazon a few days ago, then within 24 hours of that or so I found a Baby Yoda calendar online and ordered it for myself...and I got notification today that the vendor sent it to my mom's! Um, NO, I checked the order and I said to ship it to ME.... GRRRRRRRRRRRR. Either that means she gets to keep it or she trots her 70-year-old self off to the post office again and I 'd rather she not do that.... GRRRRRRRRRRRR.
Other than that, guess what, I found Yet Another Problem With Important Documents That's My Fault, so now I'm probably going to have to spend at least another week dealing with that. SIGH. I feel so dumb and inadequate at this job all the time. In a sane world it'd be like "okay, fine, so you forgot one thing that happened months ago, big deal," but here....sigh.
In other news, my disposal is dying....and I got a "new" one what, within the last two years? The last goddamned thing I want to do is call my shitty apartment manager for help and have someone come in and fix it while I have to be in the apartment, but literally it clogs so hard ON JUST WATER and won't even go down today. I was pre-rinsing the dishes and it backed up so much water it filled half the sink and won't drain out. I'm going to have to leave it alone for however long and see if it goes down on its own. God, I miss my old apartment, the drains on this side are terrible and clog on water ANYWAY, but this is even worse than usual.
After work I went to an online storytelling open mic. I didn't bother to sign up to tell this time, just signed up for audience to give myself something to do after work.
The teacher, Amy this time, is very quotable:
"I don't leave my apartment any more." -Amy on living in Minneapolis, where the murder rate has gone up.
"We want the human experience, more than we want cars, bikes, motorcycles."
"We would probably like to get past objectifying women in the 2020's." (The guy she said this to then proceeded to argue that calling a woman attractive is not objectifying.)
"I was born the most extraverted fetus in the world. I was born to do theater."
One guy talked about what he called "The Great Unraveling" all kinds of things he thought were true were no longer true, like a drastically changing workspace/work culture. Hopefully it's for the good, he said.
One guy told a story about his flaky ex-con deadbeat dad coming back into his life after years, and how he stole a few hundred dollars from his bank when dad wanted money. They pretty much caught him right off but didn't call him out on it--just put him on probation and said he'd get insta-fired if he was off by a penny. OMG. Also fun is that he (used to?) worked at my main bank and to quote someone from the chat about how he thought about their security: "“loosey goosey” and “bank” in the same sentence is not reassuring."
A mom told story of taking her daughter to see "Stomp" and at one point she just pouts and yells, "CAN WE GO NOW?" and everyone hears her. The entire show, the performers are performing TO HER, girl keeps on pouting, mom is ashamed. They ask to take her backstage after the show...20 minutes later she comes out with pizza and a smile and is happy. "I will never understand this, but Stomp understood it!" The lady said later she forgot to mention that all the kid wanted was pizza.
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