Chaos Attraction

A Phone Call

2022-12-18, 9:56 a.m.

(This is covering Saturday since I'm a day behind. If I cover anything happening after 9 p.m. that day, it happens...sigh.)

I had a conversation with Mom this morning while Roger was out. It was actually pleasant and sane.

* I asked if I could go back on the 26th to work on the lights and she said that was fine, or at least didn't seem too broken up about it. Honestly, I figured I 'might be at neck-wringing with her by that point anyway and I wasn't sure how to handle seven days in one room. Texted Steve to let him know and he said "yay."

* I note that Evan (mom's boyfriend Roger's son) was supposed to stay for I don't know how long, but apparently he'll be there the 23rd through 25th and then he's leaving CHRISTMAS DAY to go back here to his bestie's for dinner. Mom was all DO NOT TALK TO ROGER ABOUT THIS DO NOT SAY ANYTHING and I was all, I won't, I don't know what's going on there anyway. But suffice it to say, not an issue for her to go back on the 26th either.

* Mom heard from my cousin Matt: his mother is doing extremely poorly, has to be in a home (or various ones), has no short term memory and nobody wants to visit her any more. I think Matt and Mom are a bit broken up about her being abandoned by even her sister, but I said it's probably heartbreaking to watch and it's not like they can have a conversation any more if she can't. His mom wishes she could die, which... well, under the circumstances, yes, that seems reasonable. Apparently Matt misses hearing from me...maybe I'll email? It's depressing shit, but I went through similar with all the grandparents and Dad, so.

Then she asked if I was mad at her during the meeting in which the hospital wanted to pull the plug on Dad back in the day. I said I wasn't surprised. I was unhappy about it, but I knew she'd keep him alive and my opinion (or the doctors' opinions) weren't going to matter on that score. I note that the only reason she agreed to let him die was when the hospital kicked him out and we'd have to pay $24,000 a year to keep him alive, which...yeah. She said now she understands--also my aunt told her she'd never let my mom be power of attorney because Mom would string her along. I said I'd rather not have her as PoA either, but nobody else in the family cares about me and I can't trust that friends will be there either, so she's my only option--but I don't want to be strung out. She said she understood.

After that I went shopping...again. I was trying to figure out a little sumpin-sumpin for Loretta. I know she doesn't super care with regards to presents/want much in the way of stuff, but I feel bad giving Dawn presents (which Loretta knows about) without giving her something, and unlike other folks this year, she's a loyal friend. (Seriously, my list of people to buy or make for is.... low this year.) I finally ended up picking out a portable puzzle set thing that also comes with little dishes to sort the pieces, which could be useful for paper crafts too. Hope she doesn't hate it. I was trying to come up with smaller stuff, but nothing was working there.

Ashley called while I was wandering TJ Maxx, wanting to go to karaoke tonight. I was pretty surprised at that since she said last week or so she went, didn't like people giving her shit about the mask, and didn't want to go again for awhile. Go figure. So I'll be finishing this up tonight before I go, I suppose.

Then I did grocery shopping, which I haven't done in...3 or 4 weeks?! It was $200+ I think a lot of the time when I go weekly, i.e. getting fresh fixins for lunch (instead of "hm, what can I MacGyver a lunch out of for office days?" which I have done for like 3 weeks), I end up spending $100+, and when I had groceries ordered during the pandemic I'd get about $400 worth every six weeks. I think the longer I go without, the less I spend overall even if it's a bigger amount at the time?

I have figured out my New Year's gala outfit! I have a GORGEOUS beyond believable long dress that's strapless I've never really worn anywhere and got at a thrift store years ago. However, I think I'll be too cold to go around in boobies-popping-out, and it occurred to me that I've got this long black velvet top that kind of drapes over other things and has a long tail, and trying that on with the dress looked gorgeous and flowing. I'll have to wear heels with it though since the dress is too long, but eh...I got all these Victorian boots now :P Too bad my hair looks like crap these days...roots, faded, etc. I was going to book an appointment with my hairdresser, but she's left! Dammit! Hopefully the hair formula she came up with is still on my records...?

Mom asked me what plans I had and I was all, "um...none? I don't know what you're able to do?" And then Jackie immediately wants to make plans and I'm all "hell if I know if Mom can do that," sigh. Mom said the same.

Other than that, I spent the afternoon crocheting and watching more Hallmark, I'll hold the reviews for a slow or busy day at the moment, also I need to catch back up on my backlog.

I did go out to karaoke with Ashley tonight, which was fun. I would have figured the bar would have been empty this time of year, but nope, it was as packed as ever. We had a table outside by the door, which is as good as it gets. We did three songs apiece before leaving, I didn't do them the best but eh...I don't really care, sometimes you try things.

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