I actually had a sound good night's sleep and a nice lie-in afterwards, huzzah.

It's a Stiches At Home weekend, and even though I'm not taking any classes, I got a free presentation ticket. I watched a Stitches presentation on the creation of a Ruth Bader Ginsburg-esque cowl, and later watched one on thrift shopping which was pretty much a THIS IS MAH HAUL rather than tips or whatever. shrug

I have had a Knitting Incident....I finished the second sleeve of the Halloween costume and much to my annoyance, it came out really...weird and limp and baggy compared to the first one? I just picked up around the edge like the first one without counting every stitch and I guess THAT didn't go well. The tiny flimsy fingering yarn I'm using for this did NOT want to come out easily and I hacked away at the edge trying to get it undone for like 2 hours. SHEEESH. I now have it all undone and counted before starting over. On a related note, the other thing I'm working on, I had to pick up stitches around the arm and somehow that didn't come out evenly either. I don't get it.

I went to dance improv class, enjoyed it, used up the last class on my dance card. I'm told they aren't going to have that class for 3 weeks to prep for a show, so I won't be missing anything, I suppose. And much to my annoyance today, I just checked my email and they just dropped the face mask policy. Good news!...sigh. Dammit, that was the last place in town that had any precautions.

I went to Target to get sleeping pills and Easter candy and was bummed out to not be able to find those lemon flavored KitKats from last year, the heck? Then I went back to the UFO place because the robots were supposed to be there again...but it was kids building robots, I don't know how to build a robot, so I just left. Went to the library, got some exercise, it's a nice day, but otherwise not doing much. I now have four new books to read and with what time? Hmmmm.

I did a storytelling workshop tonight with my old teacher Lisa--I haven't done that/gone to anything there in quite sometime and I had to say right off that I can't tell any stories (they had slots open) because I haven't been able to write/tell any for the last few years. Very embarrassing. Anyway, the two that stood out to me today were:

(a) There was a 3-minute spontaneous story thing based on a poem that the leader, Diana, wrote about being five. I didn't do it because age 5 was awful for me, but one lady actually DID do it about the shitty teacher she had in kindergarten--and now she's a teacher so she's not like that lady.

(b) One guy I knew years ago told a story about randomly going into the Subway in my hometown (me: "I was there last weekend!") and he was in there with his very picky mother and the lady making the sandwich was so great about making a custom sandwich for her that he actually called corporate to compliment her. Corporate said, "We were considering firing her, but now we'll give her another chance." John finished off by musing, "who are you in this story? Are you Natalie, my mom, corporate, the sandwich?" and I was definitely Natalie. Reminded me that even if work thinks I'm shit, maybe others do not.

Lisa said something around the end of it about not always having/putting a bow on a story, and I said that's a problem I'm having lately because my life isn't really coming out with any "moral of the story" stuff these days. She said YES on the chat, so....hm.

Did end up going to karaoke with Ashley and Jim. She had yet another turned blue/blackout moment out of nowhere yesterday afternoon, they don't know why other than "I walked for a block," but since the blackout was less than 10 seconds, Ashley elected not to go to the ER. Her medical team constantly tells her to go to the ER for everything (she might as well live at the ER if she did that, I think she has some kind of incident at least 3x/week as far as I can tell) and she said "what's the point, they'd hospitalize me all weekend and just pump fluids into me," and since she can drink her own, she did not. Which is to say, she felt fine enough to go to the bar. She and the bartender came up with a "mocktail" of lemon juice and water, which seems to have perked her up. Her pacemaker finally kicked in 7 hours later and she felt better after that, or maybe it was the lemon juice?

Anyway, I had two Creamsicles and sang a few songs, and we got Taco Bell afterwards, and all was all. I have also now discovered that a song called "Dicked Down In Dallas" exists and is as dirty as it sounds.

I have come up with a new idea: when I want to write some whiny-ass letter to an advice columnist, I should really just go through their archives, because something similar to my whine has probably already been answered. In this case, this letter, in which a friend blew someone off and doesn't even remember it any more, but letter writer is still very angry and hurt to this day.

Captain said that the friend probably doesn't remember this at all/understand the anger.

"You’re worried about wrecking the friendship by speaking up, but doesn’t your anger about this already wreck it, for you? You’ve got to either pick off the scab and lance the infection of anger underneath, keep drifting away, or decide in yourself to forgive her in a way that allows you to let go of the anger but hold on to the good parts. Waiting in silence, pulling ever-so-slightly further away, waiting for her to notice what’s wrong isn’t going to get it done. So think your first step here is to figure out what you want your friendship to look like going forward. If things could be fixed, how often do you want to see her? In what contexts and venues? Do you want to be as close as before, or do you want to find a more arms-length resting point where you still have your history and relationship with her children, but you look elsewhere for that deep bond? If you got an apology for what happened, would it be enough for you to move forward? What does “fixed” look like?

Very good questions, and I guess the answer here is I don't know? Or frankly, just being like things are now: I see you at parties, I'm not attached. I guess that would be best outcome here since if I ever try to be closer than that again, I'll just be a clinging nutjob.

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