Chaos Attraction

More on the Internet Boyfriend

2011-05-05, 3:50 p.m.

So, Mom and her Internet Boyfriend are going to go to Disneyland together around the end of May. In a fancy-schmancy hotel room. Yes, they're sharing.

Cue the LOLCat O RLY face out of me there. I have thoughts, such as, "Hey, if I was meeting a dude off the Internet, I wouldn't go shacking up in a hotel room with him right off the bat, and you'd have a shitfit if I did that. Shouldn't you at least pay for your own hotel room just in case you don't like each other so much in person?" But I restrained myself. She's 60 years old and has yet to listen to me about much of anything.

Also fun: apparently Internet Boyfriend likes guns. This is where I found out that my dad had guns in the house*, because apparently he has two that Internet Boyfriend has on his Life Bucket List of Stuff To Acquire. Mom literally said that this coinkidink made them soulmates.

The mind boggles.

* "I never knew we had guns in the house! Where?"
"Your dad was from Montana. Of COURSE he had guns. What did you think?"
"That he shot guns when he lived in Montana and/or before I was born. I had no idea we still had guns in the house since I've been around. Where the hell were they?"
"In the closet."

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