Sleep report: woke up 2 hours in, was probably tired enough to have fallen back to sleep, except I was feeling emotionally shitty about the usual, couldn't get myself to lose consciousness, gave up sleeping at 4 a.m. or so and started watching For All Mankind instead. Drink half a bottle of caffeinated water and then went back to sleep-ish for 2 more hours. So...yeah....????

My blood test results have been coming in since 1:30 this morning. Who the shit is testing this stuff in the middle of the night? That wasn't an emergency and let people got to bed, for fuck's sake. That said, so far almost everything has come out in happily normal range except for...the B12. Normal is 301 and above, I got 226, in "borderline" range.

I started reading up on "pernicious anemia" (translation: you have to get B12 shots, what Scott has apparently and what Loretta's doctors are checking her for) and I guess I'm not THAT bad if I'm in borderline? Kind of weird that I have it lower than usual since I don't have any of the usual suspects stuff going on like being vegan. Mysterious. I don't think I have much in the way of symptoms other than well, my mental decline, though. I emailed the doctor as to what to do, then texted Loretta and she told me what she gets at the co-op, so I picked that up.

IOP: ways to cope with anxiety and depression, mostly calming techniques and distraction techniques, like cat videos and Tetris. Nothing wrong with any of that. I was glad something new was still happening even though it's my ninth class.

After IOP I went out to do errands before it started pouring as threatened this afternoon. I got the aforementioned B12 pills and also returned library books and printed out my audition sheet music and what medical documentation I do have.
I know I should go drop off Rae's gifts, but honestly, I don't want to go over there and be there all day and night? I'm really reluctant to hang out with her after the big ol' meltdown. I'm not As Bad right now, but still concerned?..

Instead of doing that, I took a nap so I now have six hours of sleep on my record. I woke up and somehow it's still dry outside?!

Tonight I am watching all of the "What If..." shows, while reading scripts for the next Shiny Unicorns readings (my online theater company). I admit I am very uncomfortable reading the script with a sexy slutty character coming onto her professor...not that I'm playing that part, mind you (I play the artist girlfriend who gets cheated on), and the playwright has been to the country it's set in so I presume she met people like that IRL (seriously she describes all Bulgarian women as dressing like dominatrixes!!!!)... but it feels like stereotypical black leather clad foreign slutty slut, speaks broken English cliches, stalks him, snoops through his work paperwork, and comes on to him tackily and mercilessly. Ick. I know we like the playwright and have read her work before, but hoo boy on this. I probably shouldn't repeat the dialogue, but it's soooooooooooo horrendously bad, like you'd think a man wrote this in the past or something, not a woman in the 2020's. Like I'd only be into this if it was meant as a joke and sadly I don't think it is meant as a joke. I don't think it helps that I'm watching television with Black Widow in it, a much more superior version of a black leather woman, while I'm reading this either :P Dana's gonna have to read this dialogue and I'm sure she'll make hay out of it, but good god, I would not be able to read it with a straight face.

OH NO AND THEN SLUTTY SLUT DRESSES UP AS HER AUNT AND PULLS A GUN ON HIM TRYING TO FORCE HIM TO MARRY HER, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS NONSENSE. Oh, and she SHOOTS and then we cut to Our Hero talking with his now-ex-girlfriend and I am all WHAT THE SHIT.
I don't like to be rude or insulting or diss someone who's asking for advice on their work, but all I can think is, "please let this be a joke or else just light this script on fire, this is possibly the worst script I've ever read and I seriously want to go bug my friend and go, "why are we reading this, I am flabbergasted at how terrible it is." Except that seems rude too.
We have two plays by the same playwright and the other one is quite reasonable/more typical, so that's a relief, at least. But seriously, WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH THE OTHER ONE WHAT THE HELL WAS SHE THINKING.

I did get invited to Jean (costumes)'s NYD party this year, YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY, so I will be going to that. I intended to go last year but ended up at Scott's the whole time...which will not be happening this year, of course. I'm wondering who all is invited because the invite was on the Oklahoma cast page and so far I haven't seen any other notifications on other pages I have access to. I'm not entirely sure if the people invited are just the ones in the most recent casts, but then again, I've been in the most recent casts in November/December/January the last few years one way or another. Two years ago she had covid and had to cancel, last year I didn't make it, this year I am going. I need distraction for sure.

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