Work was one of those "I got a lot of emails, I've been out for days, I'm gonna pay for it" days. Well, I at least got through my pile of emails by the end of the day, at least, and some shit went wrong because I wasn't there...sigh. Ugh. On the bad news side, someone on the tech side told my managers "oh, we can custom fix X if you give us a list." This is what I heard was going on circa Monday/Tuesday. While I was out, tech was all "oh, we'll just run the job (guy who's out) always does." This of course meant it didn't work for what we needed At All, and I had to point that out to management, sigh. Well, I didn't think they had the nuance to make those custom fixes anyway, so...not a shocker there. On the shocking good news side for my work, after literally TWENTY YEARS OF THIS SHIZNIT of having long names cut off with a 15 character limit for no good reason....they finally fixed it today. Like, it actually worked and everything. I had totally given up on this and now I'm just kinda shellshocked something actually got fixed around here?! You'd think I'd be more excited....well, maybe later.

They also had a lecture on how to interview today, which I went to. They said that the interviewer makes their decision in five minutes and then spend the rest of the interview justifying their choice. I guess I'm bad right from the get-go? Well, to be fair, I'm not at all enthusiastic about jobs any more either.

On a related note, I saw two job listings today. The job I interviewed for in September (we'll call it Job A) was apparently working closely with some other assistant lady (we'll call that Job B). Well, Job B lady left and now Job B is open. Very similar to the other job, same department, most likely working for the same lady and same interview panel as before. Should I consider interviewing again? I have nothing new to offer and they already knew and rejected me as is, so probably not. Someone online said "is it any better than your current job" and I said "other than a clean slate, not really," so....yeah. The other job listing .... was being an assistant for the Gods of the Giant Org, which I hate. The job itself sounded manageable, but it's working for a group that has been a thorn in my side for the last ten years, and probably in person again. Also I was all "does that mean the assistant we work with is leaving?" and that wasn't listed online (OldBoss also had a mini-freakout seeing this along with me), but that probably means she's moving on too. Eh.... honestly I just hate all jobs? I just feel like I have to consider the few that are listed that aren't math-y.

Other news is none really. I got the spinny ring and vocal straws Morgan had me order in the mail today, a day early. The spinny ring is iridescent shiny. I had to order a replacement cord for my interchangeable knitting needles because somehow the smallest cord keeps catching on everything and maybe getting a new one will fix it? And for some reason FasTrak thinks I violated a toll, which confuses me since I've got the damn tag in there and have for years. It's kind of not worked so well/intermittently for like the last year or so, so I put in to get a replacement tag. I filled out the form to say "yes, I DO have an account and the gadget and all that stuff," but also paid the extra fee via check for $12 because let's face it, me arguing with them will probably get me nowhere even though clearly I have electronic evidence/account of having the damn tag thingie.

I talked to Mom, who said (a) she hasn't been working As Hard in physical therapy as she should probably be doing because she's not sure if she should be doing exercises when it hurts or not (talk to them, I guess), and (b) Roger has finally fessed up that he has deduced that "the rest of the house is as bad as the garage." Uh-HUH. (Alas, my therapist is in Jamaica for her birthday right now or else she'd have a comment.) He said he'd help. We'll see if she actually lets him. I attempted to talk to her about my angstiness and as usual she got yell-y about it. I hate that she does that SO Much.

I told her that about 60% of me does not want to be his friend, 40% of me does, but when I do anything with regards to that, I'm so desperate that I relapse and I take any scraps as hope, so I need to cut it off. Except I can't 100% cut it off forever. She said "then you know what you need to do then, say hi when you run into him and that's all." She also said earlier, what would I regret doing since I'm normally not mean like this. Honestly, I think I'm going to regret/be unhappy with any choice I make? I feel shitty about totally cutting him off, but also I need to do it so I stop having caring, but I don't WANT to have to stop caring and go back to my old totally barren loveless self, but also I don't have the option to not do that because I'm not going to get love out of this situation EVER....arghhhhhhhhhhhh.

I am still doing the tapping seminar thing, and tonight they dropped their big-deal tapping documentary. Honestly, it's pretty effing dull to watch, but they only put it up for 24 hours, so. Good thing I have no plans this season, I suppose.

Heard from Cameron: she is hating the "Art" play and says being in it with Robert is the only good thing about it, isn't sure if she's going to do TnT and if so, audition for someone else or not. I'll try to talk her into it...at least for doing something fun. I hope that works...not that anything worked in the past. I have some good arguments though!

previous entry - next entry
archives - current entry