Chaos Attraction

I Hate New Year's

2011-01-01, 12:52 p.m.

Happy fucking New Year and it already sucks. I woke up and watched the Rose Parade, which was, as usual, awesome. Then Mom came in and screamed at me for not reading her mind and KNOWING that she wanted me out there helping her make dinner. (She has the goddamned Hostessing Bug once again, which means she'll be a shrieking shrew all day while she cooks, demand that I "help" and then scream at me for doing it wrong. Gee, I can't imagine why I wasn't out there clamoring to help from the second she woke up.) I should have KNOWN this. How DARE I want to be alone in her house or any house. How DARE I not want to be screamed at! Because we NEVER scream in the kitchen, oh no, it's all skittles and beer and love in there!

So, yeah. Already in trouble by 12:30, that's awesome.

Most of this time has been mellow, but yesterday we seemed to switch bad moods. I was hoping for a relaxed last day of the year, but no. The good news is that another resolution technically got done early in that I went to her credit union and sucked it up and got a credit card. Yes, the lady thought I was a total fucking idiot for not having gotten one in college. "Seriously, you have NO credit report whatsoever." So that was a joy. Oh well, it could have been worse, this time there wasn't anyone I went to school with watching me be lame. Anyway, that bullet has now been bitten and it's up to me to not fuck it up. Good luck with that.

And then Mom's car broke down (or at least, now it won't start). AAA was called, and it was jump started, but she still had to take it to the dealership and get a loaner. She was pretty cranky about it, though I was all, "hey, coulda been worse, could have happened late at night when you can't call anyone, could have happened in SF yesterday," etc. This didn't help much.

Then I was crabby that night. The plan was that she and I and Mauricio would go to the movies, except he wanted to see different things. And I absolutely categorically refuse to see Little Fockers. I don't know why she thought I'd magically change my mind and decide that that series is cute and funny and I would totally want to see that, but I ended up basically screaming in her face about it (I'm not proud of this) because she WOULD NOT LET IT GO AND STOP ASKING ALREADY. People keep telling me that I have to "set boundaries" and "keep saying no," but it is so fucking unpleasant to have to hit the point of screaming and she still keeps asking.

Finally, after two hours of screaming and negotiations, we agreed to see Tangled again, followed by The Tourist (M's choice). It was an all right movie, or at least I am sure it topped the Fockers by a mile. I had read about the twist in it online and saw that various people were pissed about it, but I actually think the movie wouldn't work if they hadn't had that in there. It makes a lot more sense if it's there. So I was entertained well enough.

Alas, he wanted to go home early (has to work today), so my usual strategy of avoiding midnight by being in a movie during the countdown did not happen. Mostly on New Year's I am trying to fucking forget it's New Year's, because I desperately want to be at a party and I haven't been invited to one since college, plus whatever I do I have Mom to deal with. Hence the movies. Then she yelled at me for not wanting to go to bed ASAP so I could "wake up early" (for what?!?), which was fun. Oh, now I know: wake up so I can "help" her cook. Because M is now making us go over to the house of some old lady he babysits for dinner, and Mom wants to hostess! I guess it's better than having people over to the junk pit because there is nowhere to sit and nowhere to hide her piles of paper crap and then having the Cleaning Scream on top of the Cooking Scream, but still.

So there we are, another icky New Year's Day after the parade is over. At least I don't have to pack up and leave in a few hours, so there's that, but dear god, I hate it when she wakes up lonely and decides to ask for love by demanding that I have read her mind hours ago and what kind of heartless awful person am I.

Dear god, I'll probably still be having New Year's like this when I"m 45 years old.

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