So last night we found out that Auntie Dolores and Uncle Bruce were going to dump G&G at our house for the day. Ostensibly they were seeing friends who are going out of town for a few months, but they refused to say when they were coming back home and were dropping them off before lunch. Coincidence? I think not.

My rarely-heard-from cousin Janelle called my mom to freak out about various medication stuff right around the time when they were all supposed to arrive here, I kept thinking "Man, I hope she gets off the phone before they arrive." Nope, they weren't off. Mom asked Auntie D. if she wanted to talk to her daughter and Auntie D. did. not. look. happy. Geez.

Uncle Bruce asked how my boyfriend was and when I was going to bring him down to meet the family. I said "I'm working on it, don't know when, I'm still working on having him meet the parents yet." For some insane reason, my grandma decided about a minute or two after this to randomly spank me. I was Not. Thrilled. I was REALLY Not. Thrilled when Uncle Bruce told her that was my boyfriend's job. I'm all looking at him like "Do NOT say that in front of Grandma!" and he's all "Who would you rather prefer spank you?" I said "Nobody!" and he's all "That's not one of the choices." Gah.

So the aunt and uncle left, and we really had not a lot to do to entertain, so Dad put on my old favorite, Best Little Whorehouse in Texas. After a few minutes, Grandma tells me I'm too young to be seeing it. I'm all "I've been seeing it since I was what, six?" I told this to Mom and she was all "Oh, and she thinks Road House is okay, with some girl getting it from behind?"

(To explain that one, I was in third grade and in the throes of the requisite Patrick Swayze crush, and thus wanted to see all of his non-Dirty-Dancing flicks. I wanted to see Road House, which Grandma told Mom she saw and it was okay. We assume now that Grandma must have been on crack, since all I remember of Road House is topless chicks being thrown into a pool. Suffice it to say, Mom was not amused. She still let me watch it, I just had to hide my eyes during certain parts.)

Wanna hear something hilarious I noticed about Whorehouse today? There's an opening number where the girls are singing about Mona's rules of behavior on the job, and there's one part about how they can't get tattoos because they're tacky. They focus on the blonde chick in a filmy bathrobe sitting on the table as she (and the rest of them) are singing that "Brands are for cattle, and that's not what we're selling at Miss Mona's." At that point I noticed that the bathrobe fell off her shoulder a bit- AND SHE HAS A TATTOO!

After the movie, we went shopping. For some insane reason, they insisted on bringing the men along for shopping. Okay, the most people you should bring on a clothing spree is three. NOT five. Especially if several members of this group are older relatives and one is handicapped. The racket they were all making while I was in the dressing room was incredibly embarrassing. Oh well, at least I got new shoes and a new dress out of it.

When Mom dropped me off tonight, she wanted to stay at my place. I understand completely.

I'm so jealous of Dave, he's off hanging with Scott and Demma tonight (Spider-Man. Again.). Demma is now talking about going to her dad's next weekend and bringing Dave along on Sunday to sneak in seeing me. I'm wondering how the hell THAT would go, assuming it happens. (He does have Sunday off, though...)

Scott said that tonight was a "witch's moon"- something about the yellow-gold color- and that nearly all wishes made are supposed to come true then. I'm still wondering what Dave wished for, but he wouldn't tell me for fear of jinxing it.

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