Working While Incompetent, Day 2
2020-10-12, 7:59 p.m.
recently on Chaos Attraction
Work: Day Two of "I Can't Send My Own Email" continues. I tried to cut down on the amount of them I normally would send, but I couldn't respond to most of them, I couldn't get much done, I presume my boss couldn't get much done either. Grandboss required that we have a 15 minute meeting per day to discuss the emails, which I scheduled for a half hour (and really should be an hour), and my boss canceled on it today because she's so behind on the emails. As for the actual emails, pretty much the same: a few deemed okay, a few just nitpicking, occasionally actually we get to constructive stuff. Mostly I just can't respond to the easiest of things, like "here is how to sign up to get a tracking" number, or "I have filled out your paperwork," come on, which is ridiculous. And in one case, someone made a "Let's eat, Grandma!"/"Let's eat Grandma" comma mistake in her email. I won't spell out what it was, but in the first email she's saying somebody under her is okay to do X and in the very next email she's saying it isn't. My boss was all "I don't understand this," and .... sigh.
I would like to point out that one of the things I got In Trouble for last week, turned out I WAS RIGHT, THEY DID WANT IT THAT WAY, NYAH NYAH....not that I can say that, of course.
I got scheduled to do MORE EMAIL TRAINING this week, all week, so I did very few of the avalanche of emails in the shared box today. I got to about three of them today, again. So that's going great.
Oh, and in special "Oh fuuuuuuuuuuck" news, we have to deal with Death Announcements in this area and there have been a ridiculous amount of them lately. Like probably double what we get all year long, at least. I remember one spring there were four, and this year we're at....at least six, maybe, in the last few months? Before you ask, no, they're not virus deaths. We're usually not told of what anyone died of*, but there have only been two deaths in my county of it and they have not been recent. Mostly they say nothing or "Pending" and in one case, accident. However, we had two notices come in within the last few days and ah....I just saw a newspaper article saying that the one we did today randomly murdered two people in a store before shooting himself. They definitely didn't say anything about method of death in that one. It doesn't sound like he killed anyone else in giant org's clientele, but still, fuuuuuuuck.
* We had an ex-coworker who got obsessed with suicide after her daughter's boyfriend killed himself, and was on the Death List, and every time we got one she'd call my coworker Esther and ask how he died. And every time Esther would be all, "I DON'T KNOW, YOU'RE ON THE SAME LIST, YOU KNOW IT DOESN'T SAY."
I did end up calling the ombuds office and making an appointment for Friday during lunch, for what that's worth.
One of my coworkers went to Apple Hill this weekend and said it was totally crowded, they weren't trying to limit anybody, and everyone was crowded all over at 10 a.m. Sunday. I am deeply concerned that my mom is going tomorrow, even if she's going on retiree hours on a Tuesday. I hope it's not bad. She did make comments about this being a "State of Jefferson" area (i.e. Republicans), so....sigh. She has been told to drop apples off on my porch since she is likely to "drop by" while I'm in the middle of all of my afternoon Zoom meetings, sigh.
Reggie was outside when I tried to go out on break. He spent the weekend at his girlfriend's, out shopping and dealing with dog poop. He also called me an alcoholic for finishing off the bottle ("I didn't, it's still in the house") and then said he was drinking a six-pack and I was all "Maybe you're an alcoholic." None of this was terribly serious, mind you, but when he said the neighbor between us was looking funny at him and he said he wanted to come over with a mask on, I said I had to go back to work and then didn't go back outside again after work even though I had planned to. Sigh. Maybe I just won't go back out again for awhile.
He was also basically, "You're not looking for another job or planning on leaving?" and well, I just don't see the point in trying any more when job hunting just wasn't working and that was before a pandemic. I wouldn't hire me. I'm absolute shit, I can't do a job I've been doing for years, I sure as fuck can't learn a new one--I'm not managing it now anyway. I can't sell myself. I deserve to be unemployed and homeless. I'm a useless piece of shit who deserves what is inevitably coming to her. On the other hand: so far I have managed to survive every other bad thing happening to me at work and I've outlasted everyone but my bully at this job so far that tried to take me down or had to punish me or anything. So who knows. It took me something like 14 years to find someone who could teach me how to drive. It took me 15 years to find someone to be interested in again. By that estimate, I've got another seven years to endure in this job before I am likely to find a way out.
For the last two days I've been walking around the house memorizing my lines, or trying to, anyway. I haven't actually memorized lines in about a year, and the nice thing about online theater is that so far I haven't actually had to bother. But since this show has the idea that people are going to be moving around (though heck if I know how, I doubt they have the OBS software or whatever a la SF Shakes), I figure I should work on memorizing just in case. I don't have rehearsal again until Saturday (they are rehearsing the animal scenes this week, I guess humans come in later) so I got the time. I normally memorize things by walking around and reading them aloud, which I have been doing indoors.
It occurs to me that this show probably has more lines in it for me than the other plays I've done IRL. I only have lines on around 12 2-page sections and most of the time they're not even all that many lines, mind you, but what I'm doing is studying each 2 page section in 15 minute chunks of just reading aloud all my lines on the page and then switching to the next two pages. After 3 hours of studying for the last two days, I finally circled back to the first section and I still don't remember any of those lines from yesterday. This is concerning. I did photograph all pages with my lines and put them into a document, just in case I can sub them in somehow...
Tonight I watched City Theater's Much Ado About Nothing, a show I wanted to audition for, but I had Robin Hood still going on at the time. The stage manager came out to say that you should know where the exits are, you can eat what you want, who cares about your phones, and the intermission will be about a minute.
* I gotta say, I'm biased, but I much prefer my Beatrice to the girl they cast. I like the Benedick better, at least.