Chaos Attraction

Ugly Christmas Sweater #1

2014-12-02, 2:56 p.m.

Today was the office holiday party. Which was waaaaaaaaaaaay too early in the season to be having it, in my opinion (plus it's pouring rain), but ah well. The gift exchange was kinda dull for me this year--I got smelly pinecones that were stolen and then ended up with boring placemats, whereas other people got the joke book and cat unicorn horn and gnome ornament. DAMMIT. The main stealing occurred at my table where two women kept swapping who got the giant jingle elf slippers vs. blanket. I dunno, I used to recap the amusements of swapping, but all I can recall this year was one of my coworkers being told at random to keep her shirt on. (And that joke keeps on going today....) The gift I bought was a Twinkie pan (way on sale for $10 at CVS), which got a lot of oohs and ahs when opened, but it wasn't stolen. Darn it. The food was good, though. Last year's was pretty much disgusting, but this year, everything was delicious.

Probably the most fun part of it for me was that in addition to my usual Christmas tree bling hat that I wear to parties (and then use to decorate the office afterwards), and buying a light-up necklace that I loaned out to a coworker--I need to pick her up one later-- I had something ah, special and new to wear.

Go check this out--I'll wait: Gavle Goat 2005--Don't Blaze Me Bro. Yes, I finally came through on that ugly sweater idea from last year. And I did it about the Burning Goat.

So far people have quite liked it, and a few have taken photographs with it. One guy suggested selling it, though it'd probably uh, cost a lot for anyone to buy it. Another chick posed for pictures with me and we were talking about how our office should have an ugly sweater day. Most of my group at work is on board with this idea except for one party pooper :P But yeah, I'd loooooooove to be invited to an ugly sweater party, because I am stocking up on those for the year even beyond making my own.

I'm working on a Hawaiian one right now. After debating alllll year long about whether or not to play it safe and easy and do some kind of Hawaiian Santa or go full balls out and try to replicate the entire Hawaiian version of Twelve Days of Christmas....yeah, I'm going for the latter. And I am going to attempt to put ALL OF THE ITEMS on the darned thing. Hey, I've got a front and back and sleeves, right?

So far I've covered numbers one through three (bird in tree, coconuts, squid), five (pigs), and seven (shrimp). I'm working on eight (ukuleles) and nine (poi) right now. The poi is one of the trickier ones-- I'm just making a bowl of poi sitting on a taro leaf right now, but I might add the other sort of poi as well to help clarify that one. I will put leis (#4) around the neckline and probably the bottom and sleeve ends to cheat that one, but still have 6 (hula lessons) 10 (beer), 11 (missionaries) and 12 (televisions) to go. I really dread the people ones because those will be the hardest, especially those damn eleven missionaries. How am I supposed to represent those? Old school or modern? I should probably go with old school if it's Hawaii, but the actual Hawaiian missionaries don't look that drastically uh, distinct as what they are, so....not sure what I'm going to go with lookwise. Either way it's gonna be hard, and less fun than making a bunch of cute hula girls. And even worse, where am I gonna fit them all? On the back of the sweater mostly, I think....

So yeah, these are the things I think about instead of having a life. Making wackadoo sweaters and uh... yeah, pretty much just making wackadoo sweaters these days.

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