Chaos Attraction

A Baby Yoda Christmas Eve

2020-12-24, 8:01 p.m.

recently on Chaos Attraction
Extra Bonus Postables - 2020-12-29
The Postables - 2020-12-28
Betwixtmas - 2020-12-27
The Day After Christmas Is Always Dull - 2020-12-26
A Baby Yoda Christmas Day - 2020-12-25

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Cast list as of November 2019

Vacation Day 6:
Hours of sleep: 3. I did not figure out what to put on Scott's card before going to bed and thus stupidly woke up around 2-something a.m. and still didn't figure out what to bloody write until oh, about ten minutes before I had to leave. What a waste. I finally ended up writing uh... stuff about missing him, SIGH, what was I thinking...uh, obviously not sleeping level of thinking level of that. Shoulda just let it go but at the time I was all "eh, I'm not gonna be around when he reads it, he's not going to say anything, NBD...." (see below)
Exercise: skipped today, honestly. I'm a bit thrown off schedule by having gotten dressed and leaving the house and then hearing from Eva (see below) and I doubt I'm gonna feel like hiking round the house later tonight.

Projects
Patchwork sweater: just did more blocking today. I'm totally done with the fronts and sleeves, just have...I think maybe five more squares to knit and then it's time to put it all together.
Unfinished object 1: butterfly sweater: making more butterflies today, I think I am going to try to finish up the butterflies before I go back to the patchwork sweater. I made two butterflies to fit onto the side pieces and now I need to figure out the giant back piece I want to do. So far this is not going so great, I'll put it that way.
Dragon: done as of last night! Here's mine and here are shots of the two together. (As my mother pointed out, obviously I am living vicariously with these. Sigh. But true.)

Other Activities:
I went to go see Scott today. I wore the new Baby Yoda sweater AND the Christmas dress together to the store (seriously, it was like 30 degrees out and cold), and then ah, pulled up the sweater a few times to show people what was underneath, and turned on the lights....which was amusing to him, his mom, and the other employee (Kimberly) who was in there today. Then we had to explain Baby Yoda to Kimberly. Hopefully she too will embrace the Baby Yoda Gospel.

He spotted me when I came in pretty quickly, and followed me down the back aisle I was in, so our conversation wasn't right in the vicinity of his mom.... which in retrospect might have made it a bit different from the last few times I've been in. Not sure what exactly he thought of the dragon, cute but also...weird? ("Silly" and "adorable," specifically.) Yes, I admit it's weird that I keep making him stuffies, I can't really explain it myself other than the "that's what went off in my head as to what to do when I saw the pattern" though. But if I buy him actual stuff I end up duplicating stuff he already has, so....sigh. At some point I partially overheard something about Baby Yoda being in a cabinet? (I'm guessing the one I gave to him?) In that case, oops, dragon is kinda big for that. Ah well, I didn't expect it was going to come out over a foot high either while making it with an F hook, which is not that big in the grand scheme of yarn.

Anyway, even though I was attempting to sotto voce mutter "open the card later," I guess that did not ah, sink in there this time, because he did, and then I stood around feeling awkward AF and staring at the floor... I've had a fair amount of mortifying moments with Scott, mind you, but this one I really brought upon myself there. He did not say much, but I did get hugged, so there you go. (That's seven hugs from him total during a pandemic.....yeah, yeah, I know.)

He gave me another gift certificate to the store--which duh, this time I used right there--and then rainbow socks from his favorite sock store. I ended up getting the cross stitch fabric I had ordered, more stuffing since making dragons used up half a bag, some really pretty rainbow embroidery floss he got in, some little balls of yarn in a set that I was eyeing last time, and some giant safety pins designed for pinning heavy shit, which so far has worked a treat on the butterfly project at least. By the time I paid for it he'd gone back into the back, and I decided hell with waiting around to see if he came out again or not, I was just going to leave instead of hanging around for over an hour again on that. I don't want to be publicly weird about it. I only spent about a half hour in there, so hopefully that isn't too horribly bad for pandemic safety...one hopes. Then I ended up texting him when I got home and started opening my Christmas cards, some of which were quite amusing.

I'm starting to think maybe I just shouldn't show him certain stuff? I sent him a photo of the card Jackie sent involving kids putting a vibrator on a snowman (for the nose!), since lord knows we were making vibrator jokes last Christmas during "All I Want For Christmas Is You," but I think he might have been traumatized? Ditto the one about a cat pooping in a stocking I got from Jamie, which I also love. (It's been a good card day since most of the silly ones showed up today). Oy. Is that the issue? He's more horrified than amused at some of the stuff I show him, I think....? Maybe I just say the wrong thing. Finally I just said, "They are silly jokes. Or maybe I am just easily amused." His response: "Yes," with a smiley. I apologized if I traumatized him or anything and he said "no, not at all. They are indeed silly."

For the record, the card he got me features a hacker reindeer checking naughty search histories, which was obviously up my alley... and the note within said thanks for everything the last few months, this year can get fucked, hopefully next year is better for everyone.

I also got some texts from Robert (yay someone resurfacing!), saying my gift would be late but would happen sometime, and their hot water heater went out. Very 2020. I wasn't sure under the circumstances if he'd be doing gifts or not, so hmmmm....Last year I made him a joke yarn gift and got him a few books that I picked out in person, not sure what the hell to do this year. (You know what? I like giving presents to people a lot better if I know what to get or get some kind of idea inspiration, rather than just wandering around going "Uh, what would they like from the store I am in right now?" This worked out pretty well last year, but I dunno now...)

As I got home, I ran into Jan (former CC manager, lives about three blocks from me) and she was happy to see me, called me a "spirit" and took pictures of the outfit to show to her SO. Adorable.

Then I checked my email and heard from Eva, who was up for crafting in the afternoon! So we hung out on Zoom for a few hours talking about dudes and psychology, mostly. She said I deserve better--and I do--but that doesn't mean you get it. Which well, same goes for her with all her exes, really. Anyway...it's complicated and all that shit. If it happens, it happens, if it doesn't, it doesn't. If I find someone else somehow, then that's fine too. Whatever's supposed to work out, I guess.

Then I talked to Mom--apparently the robot Baby Yoda she ordered isn't coming until January 5. Ah well, what do you expect these days, I've gotten almost everything else as far as I know, so that is doing pretty good. She also sent photos of the dragons to Roger's sister and the sister likes them very much and hopes she can meet me someday. She said the expressions are perfect. I was less thrilled with the response Mom sent back, albeit it is utterly true, about how my life is going. "I feel for her when I am so lucky to have a man in my life who so totally loves me, quirks and all. She is 42 now and thinks she will not have a relationship like I have in her life. We all never know when things will work out." True, but...hell, I get so tired of waiting around and wasting time. But as usual, nothing I can do about it.

Now I am working on cooking Chinese food dinner. This did not go so well. I planned on making (a) orange chicken, (b) egg rolls, (c) rice. So I cooked the orange chicken in the oven at 400 degrees, then VERY MILDLY heated up the sauce, like at #3, then put the chicken in the sauce, removed it from the burner, turned off the burner, and put it into a dish. Then I turned on the oven to 425 degrees and put the egg rolls in. As they were heating, I was setting up the rice to cook it and had the skillet sitting on a burner that had not been turned on...and then EVEN THOUGH ALL THE BURNERS WERE OFF, THE PAN WAS STEAMING. WTF. I didn't even turn on the burner or try to cook the rice. After the egg rolls were done, I took them out...and then the fire alarm briefly went off. There was no smoke/steam going off at the time, I have no idea why the hell that did it, and it turned itself off on its own, thank god. But seriously, wtf is with my burners suddenly being too hot? Is this a typical thing with ovens? Because the last few days, it has boiled water VERY quickly with massive steam in like, a few minutes and that is not typical.

Ughhhhh.

I admit it doesn't really seem like Christmas while home alone, but what does this year, right?


Today's Viewing:
A Recipe for Seduction | Presented by Kentucky Fried Chicken:
Jessica needs to marry for money...and she has the hots for the chef, not rich ol' Billy Garibaldi.
"Beat it, crouton, get back to the kitchen!" "Don't call me crouton." Suddenly I want croutons.
Sooooo, wait a minute: Billy used to bang Bunny but now she wants him to marry her daughter? WHY CAN'T BUNNY JUST MARRY HIM FOR HIS MONEY?!? And the banging?
Oh noes! Billy found the secret recipe! Lee has seen the Bunny banging and gets banged over the head for his trouble.
Harland has been kidnapped by Billy! Lee takes Billy out. Jessica and Harland kiss.
One year later, they are getting married and the bad people are....plotting in an institution?


I also watched the Lego Star Wars Holiday Special. The plot: Rey runs out on the Life Day celebrations to go on a quest or whatever and travels through time. She gets all fangirl at watching past Jedi masters. Meanwhile, everyone else just shows up to party.
* I love the BB8 holiday sweater and want one.
* I don't know what "tipyip" is but they are literally saying it every two seconds.
* I like how Lego Rey falls through a portal, her hair falls off, and she just puts it back on.
* "WHO! CARES! ABOUT! A TRADE DISPUTE!" I HEAR YA.
* Oh, wait, they actually allowed Rose Tico to be in this? Will the fanboys murder us all for that?
* Everyone take a time out to admire Baby Yoda's cuteness!
* I was not expecting Hux to be lusting after shirtless Kylo Ren in a "kids" special, and yet here we are.
* "How are you here?" "Uh....Life Day miracle?"
* "I've always hated you!" "Kid, I've never seen you before in my life."
* NOW VADER HAS A HOLIDAY SWEATER.
* Oh, sure, now the Emperor wants that "Best Emperor Ever" mug.
* "IT'S A LIFE DAY MIRACLE!....."
* Babu Frik breakdances.
* Just as I'm thinking "God, I miss Carrie Fisher..."


The final one on my Netflix list: Dolly Parton's Christmas on the Square. It's a musical.
* I do not know what to make of Dolly dressed up like the Little Match Girl, or...whatever the heck that is. Much as I hate to say "Dolly's a little made up to be homeless...."
* Christine Baranski wants the hell out of this town. In song. "Are you sure you want to serve eviction notices to the ENTIRE TOWN right before Christmas?"
* Jeanine Mason is in this, I really like her on Roswell. She is The Tortured Assistant Felicity who clearly feels miserable about the whole thing.
* You can sell an entire town to a mall?!?! Well, this is gonna have a lot of lulz. Even colder to do that to your "best friend" and expect your hair to get done by her tomorrow.
* Regina the bad lady bitches at seeing her first "homeless" here. Dolly bitches back that you're going to see a lot more of them now.
* The pastor's name is "Pastor Christian." Really?
* Maybe you shouldn't let your super mad "best friend" do your hair? Because at this point if she did something shitty to it, you can't stop her. "You do your own damn hair."
* "Oh, I'm going to get change out of you one way or the other!" Dolly yells. She also gives the "you me eyes" gesture.
* Regina may have a brain tumor. Her doctor is reasonably concerned about her driving and her vision...
* Dolly shows again, in her usual bling and uh...floating. "That's not an emergency button, that's a Sucret." Also, if you get kidnapped, this whole town would be fine with that. Do you have a name? "Angel." *eye-roll*
* "I hope if I have another hallucination, it won't be wearing rhinestones."
* "Hey, no damn cussin' in the church house!"
* They dub her the "Wicked Witch of the Middle." Middle????
* This is the most OPENLY CHEESY CHRISTMAS THING I'VE SEEN IN YEARS.
* "Maybe we'll just smack her!"
* (After a ton of death threats) "Maybe saying there were no bad ideas was a little premature." "YEAH."
* "It's against the law to drive and hallucinate at the same time."
* "I knew brain tumors were deadly, I had no idea they were so OBNOXIOUS."
* "Cheetah Mall will cheat us all" would make an excellent sign slogan.
* "I wonder if booze is good for brain tumors."
* "Aren't you a little young to be bartending?" "I'm an old soul." Sweetie, you look like you're 8. NO. No, seriously, WE ARE WATCHING A YOUNG CHILD SERVING UP WHISKEY BY HERSELF. "I'm growing up in the back of a bar with access to the Internet." Her name is Violet and her mom died because she had to drive to a pharmacy far away for her kid.
* "Or if your house is infested with so many birds and mice that they can do a production number, get an exterminator!"
* "Maybe every kid should be raised in the back of a bar."
* We find out that Felicity the Assistant is really an angel-in-training, and she's not doing too well. Seriously, this is the gripiest I have ever seen Dolly in my life. It is a hoot.
* This movie's idea of disco is a song called "Happy Town." Why Carl and Regina broke up: she saw him handing a ring to another girl, she got knocked up by some random dude for revenge, THAT WENT WELL. Dad got rid of the baby, Regina left town.
* Violet's been in a car accident. Regina tells Felicity to call the best doctors and calls Angel. "Give her my life." It doesn't go that far. Suffice it to say, kid will be fine.
* Regina had a baby boy and he is secretly....I'm gonna guess the pastor. (It is.)
* "Regina, we have got to stop almost killing me like this." -Regina hits the doctor with her car again. Btw, you don't have a brain tumor!
* "I knew it all along!" says one rando as the pastor announces his mom. "No, you didn't!" She apologizes and won't sell now.


Back to Hallmark: The Christmas Bow:

Kate the violinist accidentally gets her hand slammed in a door. She'll have to do something else for six weeks. Whatever will she do? Make gingerbread houses and wreaths, same as everyone else!

Okay, I've been working during this whole show and didn't take notes, but Patrick is a guy Kate knew as a child who is now her physical therapist (and everyone's PT, really). Kate keeps freaking about whether or not she'll ever be able to play as well again, as this injury lost her the New Your Philharmonic. Everyone freaks out about how Kate will inevitably go back on tour again, and/or Patrick will go off to "Not Doctors Without Borders" (yeah, right).

Um....is the relative that Patrick keeps hanging out with his mother or his cousin? Because seriously, she seems like a really young mom if she's his mom? Is the little boy her kid or just some random cousin? I have lost track. Like I think it's his mom but she looks like she's around his age?

This one gets diversity props: several Asian characters (I feel like we don't see them in Hallmark much) and a handicapped supporting character. So, good job there. I am also amused that the grandpa in Dash and Lily is in this one too, also playing a grandpa who just returned from Florida. They also had what, three kisses going on during this one? Downright racy, Hallmark!


And finally, "The Wickhams: Christmas At Pemberley" has been turned into a radio play for this year:

I really loved the first "Christmas at Pemberley" in which Mary Bennet was fixed up with a fellow nerd, but when they had the second sequel last year, I was less motivated to go haul ass to Sacramento to go see it. Happily, now it's a radio play so I don't have to haul ass anywhere. (Plot here.)

Anyway: the whole family is coming: pregnant Jane, and Lydia by herself, thank gawd, because nobody wants to be reminded Wickham exists, except Lydia talks about him incessantly and the Darcys still feel kind of bad about the bad match even though it had to be done.

Anyway, even though Wickham's forbidden from Pemberley (and Lydia still doesn't know why), he staggers up drunk and punched one night. The housekeeper, Mrs. Reynolds, is still sympathetic to him since she knew him as a child, so he's hidden "downstairs" from the fancy household for as long as they can get away with it. Brian the guy servant isn't so much, and new servant Cassie can tell that Wickham's a rotter right off even though he tries to claim they are "friends" and "the same" and "friends do favors for each other...." Cassie finds a letter from a guy claiming that Wickham knocked up his sister and promised marriage, and passes it on, leading Lizzy to be all "Ooh, we can use this to get Lydia divorced!" Lydia eventually overhears Wickham ragging on her and is brokenhearted, and between that and the pregnancy and whatnot, she's fine with that divorce. I give credit to the playwrights for this being a play in which Lydia grows up a bit and gets rid of her shitty husband, so huzzah! Love that Lauren Gunderson!

And now I am officially All Caught Up on show reviews. Time for fresh ones tomorrow since I will have nothing else to do!


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