Spilling The Tea About 2019
2019-12-02, 7:35 p.m.
recently on Chaos Attraction
Before we begin this year...
Hi, everyone! It has been A Year here like you would not believe.
I feel like y'all are going to need a big ol' primer as to how my year has gone before you read anything during Holidailies this month. Things have changed since y’all last saw me.
Short version: I have now actually gotten into theater shows and I'm interested in someone romantically again after a 15 year drought. However... as the kids say, it's complicated and we are definitely not together romantically and may never be for all I know. Read on....
At the end of the month, well... a line was drawn here between this and all other entries herein. If you choose to read any of the links within, read these two I mention at the end of July because they overshadow everything else from then on. Basically,
After people mentioned trying to fix him up, he kinda snapped that night at karaoke and well, it turns out he'd figured out I was interested and preemptively turned me down. That's not everything, exactly...
Turns out that I am on the list of women he's interested in but not going to do anything about....though his last ex and his longtime crush Cameron (also an actress, as far as I can tell on my own observations and heard from Redhead Sarah, does not seem to be interested in him in that way back) are very clearly ahead of me in line here. Sigh. Others advise me to wait it out. We'll see.
I auditioned for three other shows that month and did not get into any of them. I was only bummed about one of them because I did not get in and most of the rest of my friends did. I also got my own office at work. Huzzah!
I auditioned for Coney Island Christmas and did more storytelling about auditions. I got into Coney Island as an extra. Basically the director was being nice to let me in, as I was not needed. But that's sweet of her.
I'd love it if things finally worked out between us. After fifteen years (and rapidly approaching sixteen very soon) of singledom, I'm ready for it to be over. I really like this guy. He's amazing and adorable and sweet and funny and kind and we have a lot in common and and (surprise) he likes me back... just not as much....by comparison... So that sucks.
So as of December 2, that's where we are here. Show has three more showings to go. He's always with her, she's cool, I'm politely ignoring this as much as I can and wondering why the hell I was so hellbent on being in this show that didn't need me and trying to develop whatever the hell this is with someone who genuinely likes me, but not as much as others ahead of me in history/line. Whee! Drama!
So that'll be what goes on this month: theater shows, another audition coming up and me needing to work on getting over a pointless crush. Consider yourself warned....though hell, it's still better than The December In Which I Almost Got Fired, amirite?